Hole in your Face 1/4

[abcdefghiluvyou]

Pairing: Baekhyun x Baekhyun
Side Pairing: Chanyeol/Baekhyun
Length: 32k
Rating: NC-17

Disclaimer:The celebrities' names/images are merely borrowed and do not represent who the celebrities are in real life. No offense is intended towards them, their families or friends. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this fictional work. No copyright infringement is intended.

Summary: Baekhyun's twin was the first. The one who was with him from the beginning, the one who took care of him and protected him from harm when his dreams twisted into nightmares. But he's also the one responsible for them.

Warnings: a lot of ChanBaek!, smut, dubious relationship, manipulation, emotional abuse, twincest, intimate piercing, this fic has a lot of triggers!!! please read the trigger warnings to be safe (that will spoiler you, though, so be sure you want to read them) [TRIGGER WARNINGS/SPOILER] (highlight to read) mental disorder, murder, gore, graphic violence and abuse, character death (but no sad ending), this fic has a lot of triggers!!!

Notes: This somehow ended up with an equal amount of ChanBaek, but it's a twin!Baek fic.
I need to thank Dyris for all her help and patience while this made me cry every other day.
Beta Camiele you're really the best!



Hole in your Face

There was a sudden sense of déjà-vu when hands closed around the give of his hips and that was the only reason Baekhyun didn’t freak out.

He didn't snap, that's not who he was, but the tips of his ears tinted pink with anger as he turned around and backed away. The hands didn't let go of him, but the second Baekhyun realized who was holding him his annoyance dissolved and he wanted to whimper and sigh. He coiled away cowardly instead, but the pink wandered from the tip of his ears to his cheeks where it glowed warm and bright and embarrassing.

Up close Park Chanyeol was devastatingly handsome, even more than he was from afar where Baekhyun always watched him. His friendly eyes and open smile rendered Baekhyun speechless, as did the sudden close proximity to his long-term crush.

Baekhyun was internally dying, shriveling up like a raisin left in the sun, dehydrated and all, because he felt his mouth drying and his bones turning brittle like pressed ash when Chanyeol's smile twisted into a smirk and his hands around Baekhyun's hip tightened.

Chanyeol pulled and Baekhyun stumbled forwards ungracefully, his form falling against the taller boy's broad chest with a dull sound. He just barely managed to swallow down a squeak before long fingers slipped up his sides and grabbed his chin.

His head was tipped back, the fingers around his chin curling, and Baekhyun felt his lips wobbling in distress as he looked up and in Park Chanyeol's dark eyes. He felt his breath hitching in his chest and his heart beating wildly enough to leave him dizzy while thoughts of panic and confusion shot lightning fast through his muddled brain. Pressed up close against the other boy he was barely keeping himself from fainting while Chanyeol looked down at him unfazed.

Baekhyun stared with wide eyes, utter confusion hanging on his tongue, but then Chanyeol leaned down close enough for their breaths to mingle and Baekhyun's brain shut down as he instinctively shrank back from him. He whimpered somewhere at the back of his throat and felt the blush on his cheeks deepening when Chanyeol laughed quietly at the pathetic sound.

Confused and embarrassed Baekhyun let his head hang low in shame, thankful for his messy bangs falling into his red face to hide him away. The fingers let go of his chin after they squeezed his flesh for a second longer, but then grabbed back around the give of his hips.

"Hi, babe," was murmured into his ear with a voice so gravely deep that Baekhyun squeezed his eyes shut at the sudden shivers running down his spine. They were pleasant, tingling in a way that had Baekhyun's cheeks flaring with heat again and his lungs felt too full and oddly quivery when he took in a shuddering gulp of air. He only started squirming when he felt Chanyeol's warm breath tickling the shell of his ear.

Baekhyun's face was bright red, his shaking hands fisting the fabric of his own shirt without noticing it and his whole body was tense and stunned in shock. He didn't understand how he got into this situation all of a sudden. This close to Chanyeol, his hitherto untouchable crush, reality seemed tipped out of balance, surreal and bizarre.

Baekhyun felt out of place, as if he'd woken up in an alternative reality without noticing it, or as if he had somehow blindly skipped events that had led to this very moment. This was reality, though, and up until this moment it had been as boring and uneventful as always.

The day had started as any boring Monday morning had, getting up too late, dressing too messily, skipping breakfast in favor of sipping coffee while trying not to wince, drowning the bitter aftertaste with a choco milk which Jongdae had tossed him as soon as they met up at the university front gate. Then was the start of their 8 o'clock lecture in the main auditorium. Jongdae liked to call it 'the spiritual abyss of human sanity' but in reality it was nothing but a sleep-inducing lecture-monologue about human subconscious and psyche.

Baekhyun was almost sure that each and every participant of the course had been just as fooled by the interesting course title as he and Jongdae had been, only to snooze away the first two hours of university week in the endless rows of the auditorium.

They'd had their mid-morning coffee afterwards and at Baekhyun's grimace and failed attempt at bravado Jongdae had drowned his laughter in his paper cup of hot americano. Not even chocolate syrup and milk had helped Baekhyun to drown the bitter poison in his own cup and after a while Jongdae had been nice enough to suppress his laughter and pretend not to see Baekhyun's mouth drooping into unhappy frowns whenever he sipped on his beverage.

University was the start of adult life, though, and Baekhyun had been adamant to finish his coffee before tossing it into the bin, thankful that Jongdae hadn't commented on its still somewhat full state. He had bid his friend goodbye after they'd made plans for late lunch. Then he had hurried to his locker for gum.

This was how he had found himself pressed against psychology major Park Chanyeol, a third-year senior and Baekhyun's crush since the start of the semester. His gum and with it any other thought he'd had on his way to get rid of the disgusting taste of coffee in his mouth was long forgotten now, and all Baekhyun could think about was that he had no idea what was happening to him.

Was this even reality?

“Babe,” Chanyeol repeated and Baekhyun was pulled back to the here and now as he shivered and muffled another sad noise.

He flinched away a little more, out of Chanyeol's tickling breath's reach and clutched his shirt in distress. Baekhyun didn't understand why Chanyeol's sudden proximity was wrecking him the way it did, but embarrassment and panic were slowly creeping up his chest, clutching tightly around his heart. Baekhyun vaguely realized that he was starting to make a fool of himself with the way he behaved.

Fingers curled back around his chin and not a second after his head was forcefully tipped back again. Gasping, Baekhyun snapped his eyes wide open and shook off Chanyeol's hand, stubbornly looking back down, but apparently the senior would have none of that.

Large hands grabbed around Baekhyun's hips, this time pulling more insistently until Baekhyun's abdomen pressed against Chanyeol's crotch and against the senior's hard- wait.

Baekhyun jerked his head up so suddenly that the top of his forehead slammed against Chanyeol’s chin with enough force to rattle his brain and to knock out the senior's teeth. They broke apart blinded by the bright lightening of pain, and it was so bad that it brought tears to Baekhyun's eyes and had him grabbing his locker blindly to steady himself as he listened to Chanyeol curse and then groan in agony.

Through the tears Baekhyun noticed with relief that Chanyeol's teeth were all still intact and that the senior had leaned back and away from his personal space. It made breathing a bit easier, though the confusion was still there.

"Chanyeolsshi-" He gasped out the same moment Chanyeol bent back to his full height to grimace at him.

"Chanyeolsshi?" The senior parroted, mouth twisting into a frown as he eyed him. "I hoped we'd be at least a little closer after what happened yesterday." The senior's pained frown twisted into a leer and Baekhyun felt his stomach clenching in bad foreboding.

"What...happened yesterday?" He choked out, throat dry and tongue weighing a ton as he leaned heavily on his locker and stared up at Chanyeol with wide eyes.

The senior grimaced, one of his hands rubbing his chin where Baekhyun's head had left a quickly forming bruise. The question snapped him out of it quickly and his hand dropped to reach out for Baekhyun again. Instead of grabbing though, Chanyeol leaned in, both his arms coming up to rest on the lockers on both sides of Baekhyun's head to cage him in.

Baekhyun's eyes widened and he made a croaky sound at the back of his throat when the senior bent down and pressed his lower body flush against his own. A hard thigh parted his own quivering ones and then Chanyeol pressed and slowly, carefully rubbed between Baekhyun's legs.

Baekhyun flinched, his head banging loudly against his locker as he crumpled in shock. The slumping of his weak body had Chanyeol's thigh digging even deeper between his legs until Baekhyun felt his cock getting squeezed almost painfully by the senior's hard muscles. He gasped and finally remembered the rest of his body as he reached out to clutch the senior's shirt in his hands to push against his chest.

Chanyeol let out a breathy laugh at Baekhyun's weak attempts to push him away and leaned in closer until his lips brushed the shell of one ear.

"C’mon, don't be so shy," He murmured as his hands wrapped around Baekhyun's wrists to press them immobile against the locker. "You were so hot yesterday."

Baekhyun stared up at the senior and felt his breath hitching at the ominous glint he found in Chanyeol's eyes. The bad foreboding was back and this time Baekhyun knew what it wanted him to tell. But he couldn't believe it, because it just couldn't be.

There was no way Chanyeol was talking about him, though, and if the senior wasn't talking about Baekhyun then he was talking about-

In Baekhyun's lost moment of inadvertence, Chanyeol leaned down to lick into his mouth and Baekhyun flinched so hard that the senior's hands had to steady him to keep him from falling down. His legs gave way and Chanyeol pressed him harder against the lockers and grabbed his thin wrists in his hands. Baekhyun felt bitter disappointment tightening his throat when Chanyeol pushed his tongue between his trembling lips while his thigh was back to rubbing insistently against his crotch. The friction weakened Baekhyun's struggling hands in the senior's hard clasp, but the jolts of shock and shame helped clear up his head at least.

Baekhyun gasped and turned his head to the side, eyes swimming with hot tears when Chanyeol leaned back with a confused grunt and let go of him. It was the senior's next words which confirmed the bad feeling and put the final nail in his coffin of heartbreak.

"Babe, what's wrong? It's me."

A hand closed around Baekhyun's chin and forced him to turn his face around and up to look into the senior's piercing eyes. At Baekhyun's silence, Chanyeol's mouth twisted into a crooked smile that had Baekhyun's heart throbbing painfully in his chest.

"Don't you remember the person that fucked you?" The fingers on Baekhyun's chin tightened for a second before Chanyeol's broad thumb brushed against his skin. "Cruel," He muttered with another press against Baekhyun's lips.

Baekhyun felt his heart breaking with such clarity that he was surprised he didn't choke up shards of it when he finally pushed the senior off with all his might. Chanyeol fell back ungracefully and Baekhyun felt almost bad when he watched the senior losing his balance and falling to the floor.

"I don't remember!" He cried out instead, a bit ashamed at how insane he sounded. Sure enough Park Chanyeol stared up at him as if he'd lost it.

Baekhyun swallowed down another wave of heartbreak and forced down the tears that gathered insistently at the corners of his eyes.

"That- Yesterday! It wasn't me who-" fucked with you, Baekhyun thought as he choked on the unspoken words, a sense of betrayal having him lose his balance as well. He fell back against his locker weakly, but his eyes never left Chanyeol's who stared at him with growing confusion.

"Not you? What the hell are you-"

Baekhyun made a sound of fear at the back of his throat when the senior got up on his feet to plant himself in front of Baekhyun's cowering body. Tall and threatening, Chanyeol towered in front of him and Baekhyun saw how annoyance was replacing the initial confusion in his eyes. Something about it felt so frighteningly familiar that Baekhyun felt his stomach lurching.

Chanyeol was so close that Baekhyun felt the soundless puffs of his breath hitting his cheeks. The way they touched his skin so warm and moist made him realize how cold he was all of a sudden, how numb his body felt and how all the heat in his chest his cheeks and in his ears had faded to an icy cold. He was scared to death.

He muffled another pathetic sound and quickly turned his body away from Chanyeol, his eyes frantically searching for an opening to escape. He had to run, he had to run, he had to run-

Help came in the heaven-sent form of Jongdae who, eyes and mouth wide open, stared at them with a look of such utter surprise on his face that Baekhyun would have laughed had he not been desperate to keep himself from sobbing in distress.

But something on Baekhyun's face must have been enough to shake him out of his astonishment, because as soon as he snapped his mouth shut and swallowed down his shock Jongdae was fast to come to his rescue.

"Baekhyun!"

Jongdae's voice was sweet salvation, startling Chanyeol who quickly leaned away and let go of Baekhyun to look at the intruder. Baekhyun literally jumped at the chance and didn't waste a second to push Chanyeol away from himself before running to his friend. He heard the senior losing his balance and falling against the lockers and quickly hid away from Chanyeol's angry outcry against the safety of Jongdae's chest.

Perplexed, Jongdae wrapped his arms around him, his hands fluttering where they rested comfortingly on Baekhyun's shoulder and hipbone. Baekhyun knew that his friend was beyond confused about what was going on, but he also knew that Jongdae wouldn't ask questions as long as Baekhyun was clinging to him and trembling in his arms.

"Baekhyun," Chanyeol said quietly and Baekhyun squeezed his eyes shut at the way he elongated the last vowel in his name. There was suppressed anger in his voice and Baekhyun wondered why it was so easy for him to hear it under all the layers of sweetness. "I wasn't done talking to you."

Baekhyun felt Jongdae's soothing hands freezing for a second before they continued to run in calming circles on his body. For a small moment Baekhyun forgot about Chanyeol and wondered what his friend might think of this absurd situation. Besides himself, Jongdae was probably the only person who was just as surprised about Chanyeol's sudden interest in him. The moment Jongdae would realize the reason for the senior's interest, though, would be the moment he'd tease Baekhyun until the day they graduated.

Or maybe not. Jongdae knew about the complicity of Baekhyun's circumstances, his insecurities and his fears- and this situation was a testament to them all, confirming Baekhyun's worst fears. He was invisible.

All people ever saw in him, all that made others ever seek him out and ask for him wasn't him but-

"Chanyeolsshi," Jongdae's voice was silky smooth and so casual as if he wasn't holding an armful of trembling Baekhyun in his embrace. "Is there something you wanted from my friend?"

He turned his body a little, shielding Baekhyun from Chanyeol's eyes and it was this small gesture of solidarity that sobered Chanyeol up and made him realize the delicacy of the moment.

Baekhyun was hiding from him. So urgently that his friend was protecting him from him and Chanyeol was annoyed. A respective question was on the tip of his tongue immediately, but a quick glance into Baekhyun's friend's eyes made him realize that there was no way he'd be allowed close to the trembling boy anytime soon. Chanyeol frowned and with a glance at Baekhyun's hiding form leaned back from them. With the way that unyielding friend's eyes were burning with adamant protectiveness a tactical retreat was what seemed most sensible now.

Chanyeol opened his mouth, but at a loss for words he just inhaled loudly before he exhaled a long angry sigh with a shake of his head. With a last glance at Jongdae and the boy hiding in his arms Chanyeol turned with a soft twitch to his lips and a discontent shrug.

Jongdae only loosened his tight grip on Baekhyun when the senior disappeared down the hallway and behind a corner. He relaxed his tense body with a soundless sigh, his hands gripping Baekhyun's shoulders to nudge him away from where he was hiding against his chest.

"He left, it's okay now," He muttered and wasn't surprised when Baekhyun turned to check on his words before sagging in relief. The hands clutching Jongdae's shirt didn't loosen their tight grip and Jongdae discretely pinched Baekhyun's knuckles to have him let go.

His mouth turned a bit sour at the crinkles on his fine linen shirt, but there were more pressing matters he needed to address than Baekhyun's lack of respect for extremely overpriced designer clothes.

"How the hell does Park Chanyeol know that you exist?"

Baekhyun cringed at the bluntness of Jongdae's words, but they were justified. Not 24 hours ago he'd been invisible and his existence unknown to the senior.

Baekhyun half expected his friend to tease him about having walked into a scene between Baekhyun and his unreachable crush, but when he glanced at Jongdae there was nothing but confusion on his friend's face.

"It's not me he came looking for," Baekhyun muttered and the way Jongdae's mouth twisted in pity was proof that his friend had understood the meaning behind his words.

"Your...hyung?"

Baekhyun squeezed his eyes shut when his heart sank in his chest. Jongdae's confusion was twisting the pain in his guts and deepening the feeling of despair that tightened his throat.

Why would Chanyeol seek him out? Baekhyun was invisible.

Because of Hyung, Baekhyun thought. Because his twin had met and fucked Baekhyun's crush Park Chanyeol for reasons that numbed Baekhyun's whole body in sickening resignation.

Hyung had taken what Baekhyun loved most. Baekhyun just didn't know why.

-

Hyung was at home leaning against the flower covered kitchen counter and sipping a can of iced espresso when Baekhyun stumbled in.

Even from the doorway of their small apartment Baekhyun could see that he was deep in thought. His brother had his thoughtful face on, his bleached white hair pulled up into a messy tail on the top of his head. It would have looked like a cute little sprout on anyone else, but Baekhyun's brother was the last person on the planet whom any other human being would ever attribute traits of cuteness.

He was in all black in his washed-out hoodie and ripped skinny jeans, looking as suave and effortlessly cool in them as always. The sleeves of his hoody were pulled up to his elbows and for a moment Baekhyun let his eyes rest on the careful designs inked on the pale skin of his brother's arms. They told a story of all the things Hyung loved and admired- a sentiment Baekhyun shared, though he never expressed it as openly as Hyung did.

Despite wearing clothes that were all nondescript there was an impalpable elegance about him. It was something Baekhyun lacked so utterly that it evoked specific and reluctant feelings of admiration in him, those of the kind everyone in this world who felt just as uncomfortable in their skin as he shared.

While other's like Jongdae bought the same designs for outrageous amounts of money, Hyung wore his no-name clothes in all their seemingly fashionable touch of worn-outness with a sovereign nonchalance that emphasized just how little fucks he gave about those things.

He looked untouchable and for a moment Baekhyun faltered in his urge to confront his twin with what had happened to him at university.

Instead of walking straight to him and demanding answers, Baekhyun took a detour to the fridge and took out a small pack of soy milk. It was pink and his favorite flavor and even the fact that he had found it on Hyung's shelf didn't hide that it had been bought solely for Baekhyun. The amount of delight he felt when he pushed the thick straw into the pack and the small sigh at the sweetness bursting on his tongue didn't make him feel the least bit sorry that he had ditched the packs of cooled coffee latte he'd stacked in his own shelf.

Eyes squeezed shut, Baekhyun allowed himself to relax for a moment and to collect his thoughts. Next to him Hyung was still staring at what Baekhyun now noticed as his phone.

Hyung's face was still unreadable and closed off. He had hardly reacted when Baekhyun had come in, but that was just the way his twin was usually around him, always waiting for Baekhyun to come to him on his own terms. Hyung's other hand gripped tightly around his can of coffee and Baekhyun only threw a quick glance at it before twisting his mouth in faint disgust.

Unlike Baekhyun, Hyung drank it black without sugar and as close as Baekhyun watched, his brother's face stayed relaxed. There wasn't even a twitch to his lips, and morosely Baekhyun thought at his own incapability to get down even heavily creamed and sugared coffee.

Hyung only looked away from his phone when Baekhyun leaned next to him and pulled the coffee out of his brother's hands.

Eyes identical to his own looked at him questioningly and when Baekhyun twisted his lips into a frown his brother mirrored.

"Can I help you, Baekhyun?" Hyung's voice was awfully polite and Baekhyun immediately knew that something was wrong. Baekhyun was instantly alarmed and wordlessly enjoined himself to caution.

The thing with his brother was that he was a bit of a loose cannon, always easy to unwind and quick to lose himself in rage. He had a sharp tongue and quick fists, and even though Baekhyun had never felt the latter directed at himself he had seen the damage and pain they could inflict on others. He wasn't afraid of Hyung; there was an unshakable intuitive truth running deep in his soul assuring him that his brother would never physically hurt him. This safe assurance, however, didn't include Baekhyun's biggest fear of his hyung hurting others because of him.

His fear was justified as it had happened before. There was nothing that balled Hyung's hands to fists faster than some poor soul hurting Baekhyun and for a second the younger twin felt his chest constricting as he stared at his brother.

There was only one thing that had happened today with the potential to turn the gentle brother of this morning into this caution demanding version. Another quick glance at his brother and the protectiveness he saw in his eyes had Baekhyun's throat tightening in dread.

He clutched the can of coffee in his hand nervously and didn't notice that he was spilling soy milk with his other which instinctively tightened around the small pack as well. He only dropped both when the milk started trickling down his clenched fist, but even that was lost to him. His heart was beating loudly in his chest as he stared at Hyung, but in his thoughts he was back in the hallway of his university with Chanyeol leaning in too close and pressing their lips together.

Hyung knew.

Baekhyun was suddenly one hundred percent sure that his brother knew exactly what had happened at university.

Baekhyun felt his brother's eyes staring holes into his face and he quickly lowered his head to hide behind his bangs. Like this it was a bit easier to breathe, though he felt his brother's impatience building up like a physical force against his skin.

"Baekhyun," Hyung called and the younger twin felt his knees weakening at the prospect of having to justify himself and trying to protect Chanyeol.

He ignored his brother's call and looked everywhere but up into his eyes to avoid the wordless disapproval he felt directed at himself. Like this his gaze fell upon the still brightly shining screen of Hyung's phone and his eyes widened when he say a window of busily exchanged text messages. The contact on top was none other than Park Chanyeol.

Baekhyun's throat was so dry that swallowing down the curse on his lips hurt enough to bring tears to his eyes. Or maybe that was the combination of shock and betrayal he once again felt spreading through his body like ice, numbing him from the top of his head to the tip of his toes.

They were still curling in agitation at the thought of his brother talking to Chanyeol, Baekhyun’s crush. Hyung had laughed affectedly at him since the start of the semester and had never missed an occasion to tell him quietly to stop with his shy feelings for the senior. The fact that he was talking to him, exchanging texts behind Baekhyun's back, was almost worse than the fact that he had slept with Chanyeol.

"Baekhyun?" his hyung repeated and there was a demanding undertone now, asking him to look up at his brother.

In a sudden fit of anger Baekhyun felt his cheeks heating up in both rage and embarrassment. One of his hands shot out to snatch the phone out of his brother's grasp and he was halfway through the texts before Hyung even realized what had happened. Baekhyun made an angry sound and slapped away his brother's attempt to reach for him. He curled away, the phone still clutched in his hands as he read through the many texts Chanyeol had sent his brother and the few Hyung had sent back.

They were flirting, Chanyeol provocative and suggestive while Hyung's texts were short and curt. As Baekhyun scrolled up he realized that they had been talking for a week and icy cold numbness threatened to spread through his body again. He almost dropped the phone, but when his brother grabbed his shoulder to turn him around, Baekhyun's whole body tensed and rebelled in outrage.

He grabbed the phone tighter and balled his hand to a fist before he swung it back with a cry to punch his brother in the face.

Hyung caught his hand midair and used the momentum to turn them both around until Baekhyun's back slammed roughly against the flat surface of the fridge across from where they had leaned against the kitchen counter a second before. A few petals from the dried flowers lying on top of the fridge fell down, but neither took any notice of them.

Baekhyun had only a split-second to cry out before all air was knocked out of his lungs as his brother slammed against his form. The phone fell from his hands and on the floor with a dull sound, but neither of them had eyes for it.

For a second the morning with Chanyeol flashed in front of his eyes. The senior, too, had cornered and caged him in with his body against a metallic surface, but where Chanyeol had looked at him good-naturedly, Hyung looked at him with all the menace of a predator that knew of its superiority.

He didn't look arrogant, though. Just confused and obviously upset that Baekhyun had lashed out at him. His face- identical to Baekhyun's yet so entirely different in its utter lack for anything soft and dreamy -twisted in worry.

Hyung's lips were the same droopy arc as Baekhyun's, a constant pout that could be lovely, but the older twin pulled it up into a frown as he stared into Baekhyun's eyes.

"Are you upset, baby? Why are you so angry at Hyung?"

He stated the obvious with such shameless confusion that it brought new tears to Baekhyun's eyes. But that only led to Hyung cooing at him and Baekhyun felt his insides burning in anger at the way his misery was probably bringing delight to his brother. At the thought of his brother being mightily amused because of him Baekhyun started kicking his feet in defiance.

Hyung leaned his body forward and pressed Baekhyun even harder against the fridge, until the younger twin felt his feet lifting from the force. Trembling on the tip of his toes Baekhyun whimpered as he felt his brother pressing their chests together. Hyung's arms came up beside his head and his legs effortlessly forced Baekhyun's shaking thighs apart to rest in between. Like this Baekhyun was entirely restricted from moving and pressed flush against his brother.

The icy cold of shock and the angry heat of rage Baekhyun had felt twisted into a warm pulse of helplessness and embarrassment which had him trembling like a little bird in his brother's grasp.

The older twin smiled as he watched pink blossoming on the tips of Baekhyun's ears and started grinding his crotch lazily against the younger's in an attempt to have that lovely color wandering down to Baekhyun's cheeks.

He leaned in and let the tip of his nose brush along Baekhyun's jawline before he pressed his lips against the frenetic pulse underneath the delicate skin of the younger twin's neck. Hyung pressed tender kisses down the soft column until he reached Baekhyun's collarbones to mouth along them. His hands held Baekhyun's struggling wrists in an iron grip and the pressure of his abdomen against the younger twin's effectively hindered Baekhyun from shoving him off.

Like this it was a matter of a few seconds until Baekhyun gave up struggling and Hyung pressed his smile against the slight dip between his twin's collarbones when the younger sagged in his hold and stopped resisting.

"Hyung," Baekhyun cried out when the older twin pressed his wrists harder against the fridge in order to balance his forceful grinding.

Sparks of arousal were licking up the inside of his lower stomach and Baekhyun tried to squirm away until Hyung gave a low warning sound that had him flinch back. He let the older twin lick along his collarbones and didn't resist when Hyung finally let go of his wrists to slip his hands up and down Baekhyun's soft curves. Instead of shoving the older twin away, Baekhyun reached out to grip his brother's hoody. His knuckles turned white with the force of his fingers clutching onto the sturdy material, but his body was shaking so much that he feared losing his balance the second he let go of his hyung.

At this display of both helplessness and good behavior Hyung smiled at him and pressed kisses along his skin until Baekhyun squirmed again- this time because it tickled.

"Baby," Hyung murmured as he leaned up to glance into Baekhyun's pink face and pressed another kiss against the younger twin's mouth. His tongue was quick to slip in and Baekhyun only tensed up for a small second before he sighed into the kiss and allowed his brother to lick along his own tongue.

Somewhere at the back of his mind Baekhyun was vaguely aware that he was supposed to be angry at his brother, but the way Hyung's tongue licked along the seam of his mouth and the delicious burn of friction between his legs had him reduced to a helpless mess that was clinging desperately onto his twin and in his head a cozy warmth was dazing his hazy thoughts.

Hyung's hands felt so good on his skin and the quick change of his rough hands and the soft sweater Baekhyun was wearing was adding to the lazy swirl of arousal building up in his abdomen.

The sweater slid higher with every upstroke of Hyung's palms and Baekhyun muffled a moan when his brother hooked his thumbs around the hem and pulled it up until his chest was laying free for the older twin. He flinched when the heated skin on his back touched the cold of the fridge, but Hyung pressed him so hard against the smooth surface that all thoughts of cold and discomfort were instantly forgotten. Baekhyun blinked numbly and stared at his brother who wasted not a second before he leaned back against the younger to devour his lips.

Baekhyun felt a prickling rush of excitement when the sensitive skin of his chest pressed against the smooth cotton of his brother's hoody. When he looked down he saw both his nipples hardened and he gasped when his brother’s hands cupped the swell of his pecs to pinch the small nubs between his thumbs and forefingers.

"Baby," Hyung muttered again, this time between two kisses against Baekhyun's mouth. He licked a small drop of saliva from the corner of the younger twin's lips before he pressed his own back against Baekhyun's for another deep kiss.

His fingers were gently rubbing Baekhyun's nipples and he groaned softly into the younger twin's mouth when Baekhyun twitched in his hold.

"You're so good for me baby, so beautiful-"

Baekhyun muffled another moan, this one hidden in the crook of the older twin's neck when he doubled over and grabbed along Hyung's broad shoulders with shaking fingers. When the older twin's hands slipped down his curves to grab his behind, Baekhyun bit into the soft skin of his brother's neck to keep himself from crying out.

Hyung chuckled fondly and his hands pressed Baekhyun's ass firmly to push him forward against his own body. Like this Baekhyun felt his brother's hardness digging into his abdomen and it made him tighten his teeth around his brother's skin.

Words were cooed, but they were lost to him as the maddening pulse under his skin and the lighting flashes of fire in his veins intensified until he weakly groaned out against his brother's neck. He was close to suffocating, but he had no mind to care at all, content to feel his brother's hard length pressing and rubbing against his own and wishing that there weren't four layers of clothing between them.

It was Hyung who helped him breathe. With a quiet laugh he let go of Baekhyun's ass and cupped the younger twin's face in his palms instead to gently tip his head back and away from where it was pressed against the older's skin. Face red and stained with tears Baekhyun stared up at his twin with dazed eyes.

Hyung was disheveled as well, his bleached hair messy and his little tail tilted sadly on top of his head. His dark eyes were gleaming in an utterly unholy way, though, and where Baekhyun's were dazed and dim, Hyung's shone full of love. His mouth which was swollen and pink was hungrily mouthing along Baekhyun's skin and capturing his lips in deep kisses. Baekhyun felt his lips burning and trembling from all the kissing and he licked saliva from the corners of it, shudders running down his spines as Hyung's eyes followed his tongue hungrily.

"Babe," Hyung groaned as he reached for him again and Baekhyun abruptly flinched as Chanyeol calling him the same name flashed through his mind. He stared at his brother with wide eyes and watched Hyung's face frowning at him in confusion when Baekhyun's expression changed from aroused to frustrated.

It only took a few seconds for Baekhyun to remember all the reasons that had led him to this moment, and scandalized, he squirmed out of his brother's hold when he realized how easily Hyung had literally charmed off his pants.

"I'm angry," He finally answered his hyung, knowing full well that his older brother had only mocked him when he had asked him minutes ago. He still curled his body away, hoping that Hyung would stop touching him.

"You always laughed at me-" Baekhyun swallowed and risked a quick glance at his brother's face. It was back looking confused and Baekhyun felt his heart sinking in his chest, but quickly ignored it.

"Why would you do this- why would you sleep with someone I like-"

Baekhyun flinched when Hyung's hands shot out and grabbed his shoulder to turn him back around. His eyes were wide open when he stared at his older brother, betrayal having them swim with tears again.

He was slammed back against the fridge, and Hyung leaned in close to stare at him.

"What the hell are you talking about?" It didn't sound like a question and Baekhyun thought angrily that Hyung didn't even try to make his cluelessness sound believable.

"Are you talking about Park Chanyeol? Were you staring at him again?" Hyung's voice sounded frustrated, but there was a hint of urgency when he added, "Baby, I told you I don't want you to be around him. He isn't good for you. Promise me you'll stay away from him?"

Baekhyun cried out when Hyung tightened his grip on his bony shoulders and tried to squirm away again, but the older twin jumped at the sudden realization that he was hurting him and quickly let go. He caged Baekhyun in with his body instead and thrusted one of his thighs between the younger's legs again, forcefully pressing it up and down Baekhyun's crotch until he sobbed in arousal.

"No, Hyung- Chanyeol-" He was losing his head again and with it every thought that made him so angry at his older brother.

Hyung frowned at him and leaned closer, until Baekhyun was pinned so hard against the fridge that he felt the air being pressed out of his lungs. Baekhyun gasped and tried to struggle in his brother's hold, but this time Hyung didn't let go and when Baekhyun looked up into his eyes all he saw was pleading urgency directed at him.

"Baek, please! I want you to stop looking at him. He's...he isn't good for you, you need to listen to me, hmn?" Hyung tightened his grip and forced his thigh so insistently against Baekhyun's crotch that the younger twin screamed and saw black and flashes of yellow bursting in front of his eyes. Baekhyun almost fainted, but as fast as Hyung had pressed into him he also took the delicious pain away by cradling his collapsing body to kiss comfortingly along his neck.

Baekhyun had only enough strength left to cling to his brother as the older twin ran his hands carefully over his body.

"You little pain freak," Hyung crooned fondly at him when one of his hands cupped Baekhyun's fully hardened cock through his pants.

Baekhyun shuddered and tightened his hold around his brother's neck, breathing in Hyung's scent and jerking his hips helplessly when his brother started fondling his bulge.

Pain and pleasure were twisting his mind again until he was sobbing and moaning and rutting against his brother, all his anger forgotten again. Only when Hyung gripped harshly enough around his cock to have Baekhyun's mind clear for a split second from the pain jolting through his body did he think of his crush again.

"You ah- slept with Chan- ah yeol-" Baekhyun stammered, voice breaking with every harsh jerk of his brother's hand on his cock. He wished that Hyung would slip his hands under the waistband of his jeans and stroke him without clothes between them, but Hyung was staring at him, watching him fall apart as he pressed the hard edge of his palm along the length of Baekhyun's cock. Baekhyun doubted he had heard a single word of what he had stammered.

"Hyung-"

At Baekhyun's wrecked pleading voice Hyung smiled, one of his hands complying with the silent plea and slipping into Baekhyun's underwear to grip his cock while the other slid up to cup the younger's face.

"Yeah?" Hyung muttered and he leaned down to whisper it against Baekhyun's ear with a slow lick along the shell.

Baekhyun shuddered and closed his eyes when his brother started stroking him in earnest. With trembling fingers Baekhyun reached down to open the button of his jeans, eager to offer his hyung's hand more room for movement.

Hyung only laughed quietly, but he wordlessly complied and his hand stroked harder and faster around Baekhyun's cock. The younger twin was a writhing mess, his mouth slack and hands rubbing against the older twin's hoody with every thrust of his hand. Baekhyun's eyes were closed and his face half-hidden in his brother's neck. His hands gripped tightly onto the older twin's shoulders where Baekhyun's damp forehead rested as well. He looked so debauched and fucked with only a hand job that his hyung wanted to coo at him.

He thumbed the head of Baekhyun's leaking cock instead, smearing the wet precum around in lazy circles to listen to his younger brother's dry sobs as he pressed his nail into the sensitive slit.

Baekhyun was jerking and trembling in his brother's arms, soft pleas falling from his lips and if Hyung's hands hadn't been occupied, he'd have grabbed that sweet face and kissed it senseless.

"I know that you like him," Hyung muttered softly when he carefully turned them around so that he was leaning against the fridge. Baekhyun was a shuddering mess in his arms, rutting needily against his tight hand and leaning his whole weight on his hyung. He didn't hear a word of what his twin was saying to him, but when Hyung tightened his fist around his cock hard enough to have him choke he quickly glanced up and into his brother's calm eyes.

How all this was affecting Hyung so little was utterly beyond Baekhyun who felt wrecked and weak in his brother's arms. He gasped when Hyung's fist squeezed his cock hard enough to have his eyes rolling backwards. The pain had his knees turning to jelly and it left the tip of his length tingling alarmingly.

"Baekhyun," His brother called and the younger twin stared up with dazed eyes, barely comprehending the words. "That fucker doesn't know of your existence and I'm glad. Let's keep it like that, hmn?"

Somewhere at the back of his mind Baekhyun wondered why Hyung seemed so angry- and if he really didn't know about what had happened today at university. The irony of the situation was that if it hadn't been for Hyung, Chanyeol would have never known him. Baekhyun was invisible after all, and there was no way anyone ever noticed him without his hyung.

Somewhere in his mind a quiet voice tried to tell him that there was a mistake in his train of thought, that his reasoning was flawed and that before he had been caught in his brother's net he'd had every reason to be angry.

"That little fucker," Hyung muttered and his hand on Baekhyun's cheek tightened. "It's a bit unfortunate, no?" He asked aloud and he pressed Baekhyun close when he let go of the younger's face to wrap his arm protectively around his twin's shuddering body. His hand twisted around Baekhyun's cock and with a hoarse cry the younger twin came in his brother's milking hand.

Baekhyun was still shuddering and sobbing through his orgasm when his hyung tipped his head back and pushed his matted hair out of his red face to look at him with soft eyes.

"That he's part of your life again, how unfortunate, baby."

-

"He's manipulating you!"

Jongdae's cry of outrage silenced the whole coffee shop and had every head turning to their window seats. Baekhyun reddened and squirmed in wordless agony. Inwardly he chided himself for telling his friend about Chanyeol and Hyung and all the things that had happened between the three of them.

Jongdae's curious face had first turned disbelieving, then sour as Baekhyun had explained to him how the Monday morning scene at their lockers had happened. And even though he had kept most of his confrontation with Hyung to himself he had told Jongdae about the things his brother had begged him to do after Baekhyun had found out about Hyung and Chanyeol's text exchanges. He had talked with Hyung afterward, asking him about them, but his twin had just shrugged and deleted the texts, telling Baekhyun not to worry and demanding from him to promise him again to stay away from Chanyeol. Baekhyun had, however without any intention of keeping his word.

His twin knew how much he liked the senior and the fact that he didn't explain how and why he was exchanging texts with him had been reason enough for Baekhyun to turn away in anger as soon as Hyung had told him to get dressed. In the end, even though he had been too afraid to ask again, Baekhyun had been sure that his hyung was sleeping with his crush behind his back.

His friend's annoyed clamor snapped him back to the present and he sighed.

Jongdae was Baekhyun's only friend and he loved him, but the fact that he had always been the only person that Baekhyun had been able to turn to when things with Hyung got difficult had turned Jongdae distrustful towards his older brother. There was little Baekhyun could tell him about his twin now that would change that and so his friend's scandalized face didn't surprise Baekhyun much. It still embarrassed him.

He quickly turned down his head on the pretense of picking up his coffee from the low table, but his eyes stayed hidden behind his bangs until he heard Jongdae picking up his own drink.

After a long moment of silence Jongdae sighed and Baekhyun knew his friend had cooled down enough for them to stop pretending that their coffees were so fantastic that it left them speechless.

Baekhyun sat down his heavily chocolated and creamed one with enthusiasm and only felt his cheeks tinting discreetly when he met Jongdae's scrutinizing look. But it wasn't his all too visible distaste towards his coffee that had his friend staring at him broodingly. It was Baekhyun's whole passive self.

He took in Baekhyun's messy mouse brown hair and the eyes he liked to hide behind his too long fringe. He saw the nervous twitch of his naturally droopy mouth and the unhealthy paleness of his skin. He stared at Baekhyun's too big sweater which hung unflattering on his small frame and seemed to swallow him up. He let his eyes glance down along the nondescript jeans that looked too baggy on his friend's thin legs.

Jongdae knew that Baekhyun liked to hide in clothes that were at least three sizes too big for him, but he also knew that his friend had a nicely curved and shaped body underneath those layers of ugly. It confused him, because even though he had never met his friend's older brother he knew from Baekhyun's descriptions that his identical twin was good-looking, an irony Baekhyun never quite seemed to see.

Jongdae always wondered what it was that held Baekhyun back from styling himself into a good-looking version similar to his brother, but staring at his shy friend and thinking of the things Baekhyun had told him earlier it kind of made sense to him now.

"Your hyung is holding you back, Baekhyun," He concluded aloud, his eyes widening when he realized how true his own words were.

Baekhyun only stared at him, his lip trembling nervously in distress. It only confirmed Jongdae's suspicions and for the first time he wondered how much of Baekhyun's insecurities, shyness and general nervous incapability was the doing of his hyung.

"What- Hyung would never-" Baekhyun cried out, but Jongdae interrupted him with a scoff as he had seen his friend's words coming.

"He slept with your crush! With the full knowledge that he was betraying and hurting you! He knows that you like Chanyeol!"

Baekhyun looked at him miserably and Jongdae knew that he wasn't telling his friend anything that Baekhyun hadn't thought by himself already.

"He's trying to keep you away from Chanyeol. He even made you promise!" Jongdae stressed relentlessly, anger flaring in his chest at the way Baekhyun had been backstabbed so heartlessly by the one person he trusted with all his heart. His friend seemed to shrink in front of his eyes, but that also helped Jongdae to point out the next thing he realized.

"He's been doing this for a while now, huh."

At Baekhyun's pained frown he gestured at his friend's crouched body. With a wave of his hand he tried to capture everything that was wrong with Baekhyun's outer appearance. It ran deeper, though, and Jongdae saw it clearly now.

“Your hyung made you like this, so unsure and quiet and shy and dependent. You'd never confront your hyung with how much he hurt you, would you?"

Baekhyun's lack of a response was answer enough for Jongdae and since Baekhyun had no way to tell Jongdae that he actually did confront his hyung without spilling how that had ended with him cumming in his brother's hand he kept silent and only stared at Jongdae unhappily. Jongdae was wrong, but there was no way he could tell him that his hyung was just overprotective and liked to baby him.

"Baek, it has to stop!" Jongdae's voice got loud again and Baekhyun shot nervous glances at the neighboring tables. The thought of someone listening to their conversation was enough to have him going through hell inwardly and he thanked god for the main barista at the register who was sagacious enough to discreetly turn the music louder.

"You said you look exactly like your hyung and that he's good-looking. Baek, you two look the same! I don't get what's keeping you from dressing nice and doing your hair for once. He conditioned you well, eh!"

Baekhyun would have been happy to let Jongdae's angry words wash over him like a steady stream of lukewarm water, but the stabs at his appearance hurt and he was close to tears when he threw the pillow that was next to him on the sofa at his friend's face.

"Would you stop it!" He cried, embarrassed and hurt. "Hyung never told me to dress or act a certain way; this is all me!" His cheeks were bright red and he had angry tears in his eyes, but Jongdae's taken aback expression was almost enough to comfort him.

"I can't be like Hyung- I can't bleach my hair or tattoo my skin or pierce my-"

"Well maybe you should!" Jongdae's voice interrupted, but there was neither malice nor fire in his words anymore. He looked apologetic as he threw the pillow back at Baekhyun. “Your hyung tries to take away what should be yours and Chanyeol was interested enough in him to seek him out and find you instead, yes?" Jongdae paused and tilted his head. "You two have the same genetic base frame, same face, eyes, lips, dick...Jesus Christ, Baek, don't stare at me like that!"

Baekhyun snapped his mouth shut, which had dropped open in bafflement. His cheeks which were bright red just a moment before were white as chalk now. He stared at Jongdae as if he was seeing him for the first time in his life.

"What I mean is that you only have to change a little and snatch Chanyeol back- right out of your hyung's claws!"

Baekhyun's throat was so dry that he didn't get a word past his lips. But even if he did Baekhyun didn't know what to tell Jongdae. A frosty 'mind your own damn business' was hanging on the tip of his tongue, but Jongdae was right about one thing. He'd never say something this rude to anyone, not even his noisy friend.

Jongdae seemed to interpret his silence as anticipation, because he suddenly sat up straight and smiled at him.

"It's a piece of cake, Baekhyun! Don't look so scared! Chanyeol knows shit and the moment you show what you got he'll be all yours- he didn't even care about your looks yesterday so the moment you dress up he'll be putty in your hands!"

Jongdae grinned and Baekhyun knew that in his mind he was already dressing Baekhyun up with the excessive amount of fashionable clothes piling up in every room of his small apartment.

Baekhyun wasn't keen on playing dress up with Jongdae and he would never allow his friend to touch his hair, but he was content to listen to him rant, because it helped him to swallow down the bitter truth he wanted to throw at his friend.

"I bet it's not your hyung's charming personality that made Chanyeol seek him out. We've already won!" Jongdae laughed.

No, Baekhyun agreed, it was not his hyung's personality, but it was also not his looks. The reason Hyung had slept with Chanyeol and the consequence of the senior seeking him out again had nothing to do with looks or charms or competition.

Hyung hadn't slept with Chanyeol to take him away from Baekhyun. He had done it to keep Baekhyun away from the senior.

-

Wednesday afternoon Baekhyun sat leaning against a tree on the campus back lawn, mind absent as he slowly ate a cup of hot snacks with a toothpick.

The occasional burn of his tongue from both the still steaming hot sauce and the amount of red pepper it was spiced with were the only two things snapping him out of his thoughts every now and then.

That was, of course, until Park Chanyeol sat down next to him and snatched his styrofoam cup right out of his hands.

Baekhyun turned his head to snap at whom he expected to be Jongdae only to stare so wide-eyed at Chanyeol that he felt as if his eyes were about to pop out of his head.

Chanyeol threw a piece of hot rice cake into his mouth and chewed on it with great relish before he grinned down at Baekhyun who still stared at him in shock.

His face must have looked funny, because Chanyeol laughed with his mouth wide open and if Baekhyun hadn't been so utterly perplexed, the sight of half-eaten ddeok and hot pepper sauce would have turned his stomach in distress.

With his thoughts numbed he only vaguely noted that the mush in Chanyeol's mouth looked a bit too gory and reminded him of naked bone and bloody messes and Baekhyun...couldn't with that.

The shock of having Chanyeol so close was enough to take his mind from anything triggering, though, and Baekhyun watched helplessly as the senior's initial amusement turned into confusion.

He was making a fool out of himself again and quickly Baekhyun swallowed before he dropped his gaze to his hands.

"Ch- Chanyeolsshi," He stuttered and cursed himself inwardly. Way to start a conversation, Baekhyun, he thought sourly, but was relieved to see the senior grin down at him when he checked with a quick glance.

"So formal again?" The senior laughed as he handed back the cup. As soon as his hands were free he leaned forward to take a few of Baekhyun's hair strands between his fingers. "Cute," he muttered and the way his voice dropped an octave lower had Baekhyun's cheeks tinting pink.

The color on his cheeks was a deeper version of the soft pastel rose he had dyed into his newly bleached hair. Baekhyun felt his lips widening in a smile when he heard the senior praise it. Apart from Jongdae who'd been beside himself with joy over Baekhyun's new hair, no one else had praised him for it yet. Chanyeol's words were soothing the insecurities that had him pulling on his strands before, and weakening the memory of Hyung frowning at him when he'd first seen him.

Hyung had said little to him when he had come back from Jongdae's with his scalp itching and his hair resembling the older twin's. He had looked knowingly, though, a deep thoughtfulness on his face as he had stared at Baekhyun's new hair. It had been one of the reasons Baekhyun had dyed a color into his white strands, because the thought of his hyung judging him as a cheap copy of himself had been unbearable.

"You're blushing again," Chanyeol remarked as he reached out to brush his knuckles against Baekhyun's soft cheeks. The way his hard bones dug into Baekhyun's soft skin rose goosebumps all over Baekhyun's body. The weird feeling was back, knotting his stomach in uneasiness, but Baekhyun forced it down with all his might when Chanyeol used the same movement to cup his face in his large palms. Baekhyun felt his skin burning even hotter when his head was carefully tilted back.

The senior looked down at him with searching eyes, his brows furrowed as if he was staring at something that remained a mystery no matter how closely he looked.

Baekhyun tilted his head in question and felt Chanyeol's hands tightening almost painfully on his face for a second before the senior let go with a quiet laugh.

"You're so different, Baekhyun. When we text and when we lie together I think I've got it all figured out. But then you're so quiet and sweet and I feel like I fail to see something essential."

No, Baekhyun thought with his heart slamming against his ribcage in joy. You're just seeing me. He was so overjoyed that he didn't see Chanyeol's lips twisting into a knowing smile.

"Do you not like me like this?" He asked quietly before he could help it, and he quickly put the cup on the grass beside himself to clench his shaking hands together. He was so nervous that it was almost a miracle that his voice didn't break.

Chanyeol looked down at him with unfathomable eyes and when he reached out to pull him against his chest Baekhyun let him.

"You're so cute," The senior muttered, one hand holding Baekhyun close and the other cupping a blushing cheek back in his palm. He ran his fingers through Baekhyun's soft hair to pull on the strands and leaned down to press a kiss against the boy's forehead, pleased with the way Baekhyun was so pliant and sweet in his arms.

Baekhyun was so cute. Maybe it was the hair color or the light clothes. The boy's sweater was cream colored and his jeans were a pale washed-out cotton blue. Everything about him was so light and delicate.

He sighed and felt Baekhyun tensing in his arms at that. The boy got ready to lean away from him, but Chanyeol quickly tightened his arms, unwilling to let go.

"I like you a lot like this," Chanyeol finally answered and in his head he was surprised how true that actually was. This sweet, quiet, shy and passive and pliant version was so much to his taste.

He smirked and saw Baekhyun's droopy eyes staring up at him in confusion, probably wondering why he was chuckling. The sweet unawareness of what was running through his mind widened Chanyeol's smile and when he leaned down to capture the boy's lips in a kiss Baekhyun let him.

There was no struggle and no resistance this time as Baekhyun knew exactly what he was doing. He felt slightly guilty for taking advantage of Chanyeol's utter cluelessness, but comforted himself with the thought that the senior 'liked him a lot like this'.

Maybe, Baekhyun thought, maybe Chanyeol likes me more than Hyung. The senior had never known of Baekhyun's existence, but he did now- not that Chanyeol knew that he wasn't his hyung. Maybe Chanyeol would like him better, even if he wasn't the person he was looking for.

"I like you a lot like this", Baekhyun thought to himself as he bedded his head on top of the senior's shoulder.

Maybe Hyung was the catalyst, the reason Chanyeol's unreachable path crossed his invisible one. But Hyung was wrong about one thing. Chanyeol knew him now, and the senior actually liked him better.

-

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