If I were the rains I'd wash away the whole world's pains
I remember where I come from. I remember where I am going.
My own life is continually being revealed to me. Plenty of people have been holding up the mirror for me, so that I can see my own face. I am learning to take off the mask I wear for myself and see my secret face.
I am choosing how to fill and empty my days and nights. For example: this evening I went to the cafe hot tubs with my fabulous French friend, Marie. We were under the stars nibbling brownies and she exclaimed, "Oh! this is so much more important that our dramas!" True that. I came home wired from a little coffee and chocolate, and have stayed up late making gnocchi from red kabocha and buttercup squash. Two gallons! Can you believe it?
Tomorrow evening, I'm hostessing yet another local food dinner. On the menu: salad from le farm, homemade gnocchi with sauteed kale and roasted chestnuts (thanks Jacques, Amy, Michael and John!), then a giant apple crisp (thanks Mark!). I do love knowing those who produce my food. Also - the salad, kale and apples were harvested with my very own hands. Good times.
Recently, I have been refocusing my efforts toward healing from my surgery (read: serious bodily desecration), and further endometriosis complications. Massage, meditation, eating well, ending my frequent intoxication with alcohol and drugs, ending destructive relationships are first steps in the right direction. I am learning to care for myself and allow myself to be cared for.
I am healing from betrayal and injury. Tofu and I have formally ended our partnership. Although we are talking and perhaps entering contract renegotiation. Either way, my fabulous self is savoring my fabulous life. I said to him today "I don't need you to complete me, but I do love the way we complement one another."
I am painting again. I am finding strength in myself again. I am coming into fullness.
I keep telling myself: Be here now. Be someplace else later.
My own life is continually being revealed to me. Plenty of people have been holding up the mirror for me, so that I can see my own face. I am learning to take off the mask I wear for myself and see my secret face.
I am choosing how to fill and empty my days and nights. For example: this evening I went to the cafe hot tubs with my fabulous French friend, Marie. We were under the stars nibbling brownies and she exclaimed, "Oh! this is so much more important that our dramas!" True that. I came home wired from a little coffee and chocolate, and have stayed up late making gnocchi from red kabocha and buttercup squash. Two gallons! Can you believe it?
Tomorrow evening, I'm hostessing yet another local food dinner. On the menu: salad from le farm, homemade gnocchi with sauteed kale and roasted chestnuts (thanks Jacques, Amy, Michael and John!), then a giant apple crisp (thanks Mark!). I do love knowing those who produce my food. Also - the salad, kale and apples were harvested with my very own hands. Good times.
Recently, I have been refocusing my efforts toward healing from my surgery (read: serious bodily desecration), and further endometriosis complications. Massage, meditation, eating well, ending my frequent intoxication with alcohol and drugs, ending destructive relationships are first steps in the right direction. I am learning to care for myself and allow myself to be cared for.
I am healing from betrayal and injury. Tofu and I have formally ended our partnership. Although we are talking and perhaps entering contract renegotiation. Either way, my fabulous self is savoring my fabulous life. I said to him today "I don't need you to complete me, but I do love the way we complement one another."
I am painting again. I am finding strength in myself again. I am coming into fullness.
I keep telling myself: Be here now. Be someplace else later.