Life, or: why are you not here??

[aadroma]

And life goes on. But that lingering anger still remains of Carl not being here. There's no reason he should be dead now, in my mind. Had he started caring for himself -- rather than assuming death was inevitable because of his weight -- he would still be here. And that still upsets me to this day

Comments

[greatbearmd]

You have every reason to feel this way. As terrible the loss of Carl is, it is one of those cautionary "be careful what you wish for" scenarios. My best friend, who just recently lost his mom suddenly, has let himself go in a really bad way. Never healthy in later years, he's extremely overweight, is suffering with back issues similar to mine yet won't have the surgeries to try and correct it, can't walk or stand for more than a minute or two, and has many of the typical ailments that accompany being 400 pounds and totally inactive. He's been dropping more and more of those same statements that Carl had been, and it makes me, as well as everyone else quite angry. He was genuinely surprised at the turnout for his mother's memorial, and especially those concerned about his well being. he is completely alone in the house now. We talk daily and i keep encouraging him to make a better life for himself, but that damned talk angers me so.

I wish I could comfort you in some way, I bawled my eyes out when i found out what happened. And felt so helpless. I've been learning to make the best of things as soon as time permits. Life is far too uncertain.

Much love..