We'll send him cheesy movies / the worst we can find
This, again, came up when I was in Benton Harbour this past weekend (yes, I'm getting to that post. Honest!):
What, in your opinion, is the worst movie you've ever seen? Why do you find it so terrible?
What, in your opinion, is the worst movie you've ever seen? Why do you find it so terrible?
--- you have to trust me and michael on this one.
A former landlady, suggested Titanic. We ended up going against "her" decision for a good summer movie to watch - and boy were we ever so STUPID. There was this brand new Theatre with Stadium Seating that opened in the Fashion Valley Shopping Mall District, in San Diego, California.
Very beginning of the film... Some Actor named Ryan O'Neals voice speaking while on a black screen, "For those of you who purchased a ticket for this film" White Capital Letters flashed, "Y.O.U.R. space, next line, F.U.*.*.*.D."
I wanted to see an Alan Smithe film. Directors name themselves Alan Smithe, so they don't embarras themselves. and it all starts with Whoopi Goldburg, Sly Stallone, and Jackie Chan and some kind of stupid ass explosion special FX, with cheesy building models of buildings and a freeway being blown to bits.
Do I begin to even go further into this film, word for word ?
Rodger... dear, I begged Michael that I'm gonna get a refund, just two minutes before the time expired at the Ticket Booth. Trust me, only four other people filled the seats and maybe one person stayed there... because they fell asleep during the movie.
Ryan O'Neal simply tries to make this film about a Vlog / Documentary about how his life as a Movie Producer is so lame and pathetic... while he allows some female chick to give him head from inside of his Red Convertable sportscar... at a certain angle.
This is like 10 minutes into the film --- and even Sly Stallone is saying, "I'm only letting you do this for free, because I know you'll be in the poor house when all of this is over."
Whoopi Goldberg is walking away from the Camera. "I've got better things to do with my time, and so does the Audience."
The show goes back to Ryan O'Neal, throwing a tantrum, destroys a cell phone and runs it over with his sport car... takes this Blonde Girl to a Restaurant and for five minutes they can't decide on a Lobster or Fried Chicken.
There is no plot... it's Nag, Complain, Commentary... and some kind of thing on the bottom on the screen that is used for foreign films, so you can guess what this person is about...
Ever watch Cartoons, where Road Runner and the Coyote, have this Latin Idiotic Quote attached to them ? The people in the film who were the producers were so degrated into these awful names... and you would think that if word ever gets out, that this is how the producer feels about these people... he won't be eating lunch again, at Culver City, and most likely unemployable.
You cannot eat a bag of popcorn... with this film, there is a scene where the Blonde Girl purges herself and vomits. If you are eating or drinking at that certain time, you lose your need to eat anything.
That's when I couldn't take this film anymore.
And it was at least a triple digit weather day... but in spite of the air conditioning, and the nice buttery popcorn... you just couldn't make me sit there for a minute longer than 26.
T.G.
Reply
Leave a comment