Finals
No one really existed after that. I remember something about crying, laughing maybe, praying, singing, and screaming. But, for the most part, we hardly were. I was rarely aware of my conciousness outside of the seldom memory that would enter my head involuntarily. Incomplete memories. Random words, spoken and written, it didn't mean anything, but I knew I was alive. I can remember the afternoon because I walked home, it was cloudy, humid, and cool. My hair was short, my ankles hurt, and I began to exit my body. I suddenly became aware of everything that was over, everything that would never be, ever again, real to me. I had to acquire a new body. A new mind and soul because I had given up the old, given them over completely, and I wouldn't know for a very long time if it would mean anything in the end. So much was gone. This community, this closeness, these people, the knowledge shared, would never exist for me in the way it once did. I remember being confused, feeling a sense of finality. Footsteps, walking out, doors closing, breathing the air outside, what would my life be like now? In my half-concious state I made the decision to run. What I could remember from the weeks before told me that things would become clearer if I could simply be on different ground. It was there, then, in the middle of the grass, that completely ceased to operate. The complete understanding, the realization of what was over, ripped all breath out of my lungs and I fell to the earth. It is over. I knew then everything would be alright.