My so-called "glasses"
****This is not really about eyesight and opthimologists.
Let's pretend it is, though, in the service of allegory.****
I've been having "headaches" for a long, long time, and haven't been able to "see" things nearly as well as most people I know.
My family doesn't believe in "astigmatism", and so I didn't either, really, for many years. (I mean, sure, I bought that it happened to other folks, but my own life hadn't been hard enough to give me cataracts. Yet. Right?) All of us squint constantly, for what it's worth.
In the meantime, I tried doing eye-exercises religiously. I did all sorts of complicated things with the contrast and text-size settings on my computer at work. I switched to a diet high in vitamin A, and gave up reading in situations with less than ideal lighting. I wore polarized sunglasses, hypoallergenic mascara, and I did my damnedest to get enough sleep.
But the headaches and the encroaching blindness just got worse.
And then someone jammed a toothpick through one of my eyes, and I finally felt justified in going to the doctor.
Who declared, in the midst of extracting the toothpick, "You very obviously need glasses."
"But shouldn't I just eat more carrots?"
"We recommend that to people as something to try before shelling out for an eye exam, but you've already tried everything we suggest along those lines. Go get glasses."
"But... doesn't that mean I'm not trying hard enough not be a dork? Who can't see things just because she's too lazy to really look carefully? I mean... do I really deserve the ease that glasses will bring me? Aren't those just for poor, beleagered orphans who were brought into a world of pain through no fault of their own?"
"Go get the damned glasses already. You're never going to see any better without them."
Anyway. After a 2 month wait, I finally have an appointment with the optimologist.
(Did I mention that I've got a driving exam coming up in a few weeks? Man, having better eyesight would make that suck a lot less.)
I am equal parts hopeful that these glasses that so many people sing the praises of will help me, too, and fearful that the doctor will look at my eyes and say, "Your problem is that you just don't do enough eye exercises."
What if this doctors appointment finally changes my life for the better?
Or, what if it doesn't?
That is why I'm so damned antsy today, thanks for asking.