god damnit

[a_rat_race]

so today i realized that i have absolutely no special anything that will make my college application look special....what the FUCK am i going to do....i need reassurance that im not a complete waste and that i do have a chance of getting somewhere more prestigiouse than SMC without any extras on my application...throughout high school i have shown dedication to absolutely nothing...there are no clubs that i actually joined...i prefered to spend my lunches with friends rather than sitting through a meeeting i didnt give a rats ass about.... i showed no commitment in sports, drama, dance, or any other extra curricular activity... i have ZERO hours of community service....and absolutely no achievements to be proud of....what the fuck am i going to do???? i need to get out of my house and college is one of the only options...not to mention that i really do wanna do something with my life...being a jamba juice employee for the rest of my life isnt too tempting.on top of all this shit ive realized i dont have enough of a sob story to give anyone so that theyd wanna give me scholarship money....so im broke...without a good looking future....FUCK i wish i had actualy gotten involved....

....u wanna know what the saddest part of this whole thing is...i really dont plan on spending senior year on catchinng up on the involvment that i missed out in during the rest of high school....

...man fuck this shit....

FUUUUUCK!