(no subject)
There has been some shit going down these past two weeks that have been making me angst, depressed and just fucking lost. All right, first thing. I smoke pot. I'm not addicted and I can stop at any point. For those of you who say I'm stupid and should just stop should just stop badgering me. Honestly, it's pot. It's something I do, I guess a part of my life. If I get caught then I will get caught all right? Next thing, I'm sick and tired of these friends of mine who bitch and complain about their boyfriends. Honestly women, if they are fucking assholes or you hate them then fuck em? Honestly, what's the fucking point if they are just going to " break your heart." Think about it, maybe half the problem is your own decision to pursue that person. I fucking hate it. What is worst is that, even though they fuck with your head and make you feel horrible...you still want to be with them. It may not even be that they fuck with you, it's that you hate them? This person knows who they are. You don't make any sense? The guy wakes you up everyday or something? Why don't you just close your door and turn off your cell? I don't understand. Are people blind to the point where their own common sense and theories of how things work are so diluted from how things work? I honestly sit here and fucking laugh. I mean, take this one girl for instance. I tried for a good long year, shot down a couple of times. Didn't really bring me down too much. Contradicting? Maybe, but let me get my point across. She knows who she is all right? Well listen YOU, You fucked me over and I still tried. You fucked me over twice and I can barley care for you. But listen, the last...what? Two you guys have dated/dating are assclown right? Well fucking look for something you know you could deal with everyday instead of having to fucking hurt over. Maybe it's my fault. Maybe I wouldn't be so pissed if I never befriended these girls. Maybe if I just ignored them I wouldn’t be writing this thing out. Next order of business, I’m getting a band going. I’ll keep you all updated on it if you have any interest. I wish someday, as mean as it sounds. I could become disgustingly honest, even when I’m not drunk or stoned and let her know just exactly how I feel. I’d fucking blow her away, it’s obscene. Another thing, I have just been really depressed lately. Listening to a lot of music has kind of made things better but at the end of the day. I’m just a heavy set fuckhead looking for the wrong things in all the right places. It’s rough because no one can really help it but myself. I don’t fuck chicks. It’s all about the music anyhow.