Private
Well, that's another one of my invitations that Luna has ignored. We never talk anymore. I really haven't seen much of her at all since she moved out of the Lighthouse and back to the Mill. I'm beginning to think her silence is more than simply being busy.
When I think back on things, I can see she's been pulling away for a long time now. She hasn't been herself since the Battle. I know what happened to her was traumatic, but because she wasn't seriously injured physically, I don't think she ever got the care and treatment that she really needed to deal with it.
My amnesia didn't help. I simply wasn't there when she needed someone to talk to about what happened. I failed her twice...once when her involvement with me made her into a target, and again by not being there to help her find a way to deal with the results of that awful time. Perhaps her family discussed things with her while she was in France, but if so, I don't think it helped her much.
I really hoped that my going after the last of Voldemort's werewolves would help put some of those demons to rest for her, but I don't think it did. She seemed supportive of the idea at first, but looking back on it, I don't think she wanted me to go. She promised to write to me while I was away, but she never did. Then when I returned and was so sick with silver poisoning, I rarely saw her.
I think the very fact that I was suffering from something that would never harm a normal person just brought it home all the more clearly that I am the very thing she's come to fear so deeply.
Whenever I try to talk about this with her, she always finds some reason not to discuss it. I think she was happy when school began and she could move away and throw herself into her work. I really don't know what to do anymore. I don't want to hurt her any more than she's already been hurt. Perhaps the kindest thing I can do now is bow to what seems inevitable and let her go.
When I think back on things, I can see she's been pulling away for a long time now. She hasn't been herself since the Battle. I know what happened to her was traumatic, but because she wasn't seriously injured physically, I don't think she ever got the care and treatment that she really needed to deal with it.
My amnesia didn't help. I simply wasn't there when she needed someone to talk to about what happened. I failed her twice...once when her involvement with me made her into a target, and again by not being there to help her find a way to deal with the results of that awful time. Perhaps her family discussed things with her while she was in France, but if so, I don't think it helped her much.
I really hoped that my going after the last of Voldemort's werewolves would help put some of those demons to rest for her, but I don't think it did. She seemed supportive of the idea at first, but looking back on it, I don't think she wanted me to go. She promised to write to me while I was away, but she never did. Then when I returned and was so sick with silver poisoning, I rarely saw her.
I think the very fact that I was suffering from something that would never harm a normal person just brought it home all the more clearly that I am the very thing she's come to fear so deeply.
Whenever I try to talk about this with her, she always finds some reason not to discuss it. I think she was happy when school began and she could move away and throw herself into her work. I really don't know what to do anymore. I don't want to hurt her any more than she's already been hurt. Perhaps the kindest thing I can do now is bow to what seems inevitable and let her go.