(no subject)
Moments of feeling such dislike towards me, these moments formulate how everything will be. Moments of pleasure, but the pleasure doesn't last in my memory so it's all black.
This weekend I went to the forest with my mother. It was so beautiful.
I am so wrong though, so faulty. It's like I wasn't made right.
I yearn for contacts with other people but I seriously can't cope with it all. I feel disliked and missunderstood.
I wish it wasn't so difficult, life. I wish it was a piece of cake or a walk in the park or some other english expressions that sounds so lovely but never exists.
I wish I didn't feel so disliked all the time. It's really hard work.
There is so much (too much) hanging loose at the moment. My caregivers (shrink and psyciatrist) and my work situation and my unemployment status at the fifty percent I dont' work now....it's all up in the air way to much for me, who need stability and even though my mind is so chaotic a lot of the time, I still need that stability of mind so much.
It smells like sleep in here.
Have I pissed everybody off? Have I?
This weekend I went to the forest with my mother. It was so beautiful.
I am so wrong though, so faulty. It's like I wasn't made right.
I yearn for contacts with other people but I seriously can't cope with it all. I feel disliked and missunderstood.
I wish it wasn't so difficult, life. I wish it was a piece of cake or a walk in the park or some other english expressions that sounds so lovely but never exists.
I wish I didn't feel so disliked all the time. It's really hard work.
There is so much (too much) hanging loose at the moment. My caregivers (shrink and psyciatrist) and my work situation and my unemployment status at the fifty percent I dont' work now....it's all up in the air way to much for me, who need stability and even though my mind is so chaotic a lot of the time, I still need that stability of mind so much.
It smells like sleep in here.
Have I pissed everybody off? Have I?