thank you mother, for drunk dialing me on thanksgiving
thanksgiving:
listened to Suicide and cleaned my room. dance dance danced some.
made oatmeal cookies, burnt the bottoms on accident.
made music with a friend that is home from Bar Harbor.
scraped the burnt parts off the bottoms of the cookies while said friend told me stories about the smelly seals that live on her island.
spread crunchy peanut butter on said cookies, and added banana slices and vanilla granola.
flipped through old National Geographic magazines with j. bol.
learned how to position myself to punch people so it hurts.
i had some brown rice with cilantro paste and tofutti sour cream for breakfast. i wasn't hungry for lunch or dinner, and had no plans with my should-be-illegitimate family.
i've learned a lot about my mom since we both decided we hated her side of the family! i've known her for twenty one years but i don't really know much about her. she's not one to talk about the past, and i was never really one to ask. it's a mutual kind of apathy. when we lived together we'd shoot the shit over how weird fox news was or we'd exchange parts of the paper when we were finished. it's really weird, but i've recently realized that my mom and have never hung out. i think she's agoraphobic...she freaked out when we saw Titanic at the mall back in '97.
she asked me what she should get my cousin christina, and i said, "something expensive and pink."
she asked me what she should get my cousin matt, and i said, "something a high school douche-bag-jock would like."
she asked me what she should get my cousin katie, and i said, "something a middle school girl would look cute with."
she asked me what to get our younger, married-into-the-family-cousin-max, and i said, "how about a tranquilizer."
she laughed in a way i've never heard. the beer, obvz. we all think he's satan reincarnated sometimes. it totally helps that he looks like Damien from the omen.
she mentioned my cousin katie likes doing arts and crafts now, which is awesome. i told madre to let me sit with that thought. i'm glad that at least one of my cousins is doing something artistic and/or requires thought.
she'd eventually mentioned how she didn't know how to cook a turkey and she made chocolate muffins instead of apple pie. this somehow led into us talking about music for the first time ever. i got her a marshall tucker band record two years ago and she loved it. she never mentioned records after this happened. tonight i found out she had ten milk crates full of records back in the 80s, and that they were all stolen when she was moving one day. apparently my mom's friend stole most of the records for my mother in the first place. while she was in a drunken rant, i drifted off to think that somebody knew about my mom's hot records and decided to teach a lesson on karma. i came back when she stopped talking. that usually means it's my turn to say, "yeah" like i know what was just said.
what a weird "thanksgiving."
listened to Suicide and cleaned my room. dance dance danced some.
made oatmeal cookies, burnt the bottoms on accident.
made music with a friend that is home from Bar Harbor.
scraped the burnt parts off the bottoms of the cookies while said friend told me stories about the smelly seals that live on her island.
spread crunchy peanut butter on said cookies, and added banana slices and vanilla granola.
flipped through old National Geographic magazines with j. bol.
learned how to position myself to punch people so it hurts.
i had some brown rice with cilantro paste and tofutti sour cream for breakfast. i wasn't hungry for lunch or dinner, and had no plans with my should-be-illegitimate family.
i've learned a lot about my mom since we both decided we hated her side of the family! i've known her for twenty one years but i don't really know much about her. she's not one to talk about the past, and i was never really one to ask. it's a mutual kind of apathy. when we lived together we'd shoot the shit over how weird fox news was or we'd exchange parts of the paper when we were finished. it's really weird, but i've recently realized that my mom and have never hung out. i think she's agoraphobic...she freaked out when we saw Titanic at the mall back in '97.
she asked me what she should get my cousin christina, and i said, "something expensive and pink."
she asked me what she should get my cousin matt, and i said, "something a high school douche-bag-jock would like."
she asked me what she should get my cousin katie, and i said, "something a middle school girl would look cute with."
she asked me what to get our younger, married-into-the-family-cousin-max, and i said, "how about a tranquilizer."
she laughed in a way i've never heard. the beer, obvz. we all think he's satan reincarnated sometimes. it totally helps that he looks like Damien from the omen.
she mentioned my cousin katie likes doing arts and crafts now, which is awesome. i told madre to let me sit with that thought. i'm glad that at least one of my cousins is doing something artistic and/or requires thought.
she'd eventually mentioned how she didn't know how to cook a turkey and she made chocolate muffins instead of apple pie. this somehow led into us talking about music for the first time ever. i got her a marshall tucker band record two years ago and she loved it. she never mentioned records after this happened. tonight i found out she had ten milk crates full of records back in the 80s, and that they were all stolen when she was moving one day. apparently my mom's friend stole most of the records for my mother in the first place. while she was in a drunken rant, i drifted off to think that somebody knew about my mom's hot records and decided to teach a lesson on karma. i came back when she stopped talking. that usually means it's my turn to say, "yeah" like i know what was just said.
what a weird "thanksgiving."