Damn you, Anthony!
Ok, so I think I might just die. I was at work today (at the theater) and I'm sitting on the stage talking to Chris, our choreographer. And our stage manager, Anthony (who, btw, is one of my new favorite people. He's so funny), is sitting in the audience. I catch his eye and I stick my toungue out at him 'cause I was feeling silly. He gave me this shocked look and then mouthed "Do you like him?" to me, with his eyes flicking to Chris, who was sitting next to me. I could feel my eyes get wide and I just got up and lost my self in the theater's many backstage passages with this "What?!?" look on my face. I walk past the scene shop and Anthony's in there. I stick my head in and say "I don't know what you're talking about." He laughs and says "Oh, it's so obvious." I walk away but then stick my head back in, "Is it really that obvious?" He looked at me over his glasses and says "Whould I be saying anything if it wasn't?" I walk away trying to ignore him. Later, I', sttanidng on the stage talking to Chris again and I walk to get something and Anthonywalks by me and whispers to me "Just wathc out for his hair when you make-out, it's kinda gel-y." My jaw dropped and I had to turn around and walked the other way. Of course, then I couldn't stop staring at Chris's hair for the rest of the time. It's long and black but he spikes it up and the spikes are like two inches each.
It's not even like I like him! ..... I don't!
...Ok.... maybe I do.
I can't help it! He's funny, and the way he moves is just amazing and he's tall and his smile is adorable and he's modest and the kids love him and he's always so nice and gah!! It's driving me insane! Why can't he be ugly and mean? Or least all of those things and my age! He just graduated form high school, I'm going to be a sophmore. This is my first real crush in a long time and there's nobody even to talk about it with 'cause non of my friends know him and there are two other girls who I work with and both are older than me and know him slightly better. And this girl Jayne I think like's him, too 'cause she's very territoral around him. She was sittting at a production meeting yesterday and there was an empty chair next to her and I sat down and she freaked out and made me get up because that was Chris's chair. He got there late and there was no chairs left and I offered to share my chair 'cause the kid weighs well, nothing, and she gave me this evil look. She's kind of a bitch anyway, so I'm not terribly worried.
All the smut I've been reading lately doesn't help either. It kinda just makes it worse. Like, yesterday I teasing him becuase he never wears just a t-shirt, he always has a long-sleeve shirt or a jacket on, and I suddenly had this very vivid image of me slipping his jacket off and his bare arms around me... and it was bad! There wasa bunch of little kids arund, for Christ's sake! He's funny with the kids though. All the little black girls hit on him all the time and he just gets this disturbed look on his face it's hysterical. I thought I scared him away for good the other day when our director told this girl to take the guy's arm and she said "That's what girl's do, they take their arms." and I turned to him and said "That's not all girls take." He looked so traumitized. But, then, a whole bunch of twelve- year- olds were telling us jokes and it was so funny becuase they're all so innocent. He looks at me and says "I can't tell any of my funny jokes." and I had just siad that all my funny jokes were inapppropriate. He's so cute when he smiles at the girl's watching him dancing to hip-hop, with their faces pressed to the window of the dance studio (which is so much more entertaining than him dancing to showtunes, btw.) Ok, so maybe I do like him, so what?
Gah, no idea what to do. Help?
It's not even like I like him! ..... I don't!
...Ok.... maybe I do.
I can't help it! He's funny, and the way he moves is just amazing and he's tall and his smile is adorable and he's modest and the kids love him and he's always so nice and gah!! It's driving me insane! Why can't he be ugly and mean? Or least all of those things and my age! He just graduated form high school, I'm going to be a sophmore. This is my first real crush in a long time and there's nobody even to talk about it with 'cause non of my friends know him and there are two other girls who I work with and both are older than me and know him slightly better. And this girl Jayne I think like's him, too 'cause she's very territoral around him. She was sittting at a production meeting yesterday and there was an empty chair next to her and I sat down and she freaked out and made me get up because that was Chris's chair. He got there late and there was no chairs left and I offered to share my chair 'cause the kid weighs well, nothing, and she gave me this evil look. She's kind of a bitch anyway, so I'm not terribly worried.
All the smut I've been reading lately doesn't help either. It kinda just makes it worse. Like, yesterday I teasing him becuase he never wears just a t-shirt, he always has a long-sleeve shirt or a jacket on, and I suddenly had this very vivid image of me slipping his jacket off and his bare arms around me... and it was bad! There wasa bunch of little kids arund, for Christ's sake! He's funny with the kids though. All the little black girls hit on him all the time and he just gets this disturbed look on his face it's hysterical. I thought I scared him away for good the other day when our director told this girl to take the guy's arm and she said "That's what girl's do, they take their arms." and I turned to him and said "That's not all girls take." He looked so traumitized. But, then, a whole bunch of twelve- year- olds were telling us jokes and it was so funny becuase they're all so innocent. He looks at me and says "I can't tell any of my funny jokes." and I had just siad that all my funny jokes were inapppropriate. He's so cute when he smiles at the girl's watching him dancing to hip-hop, with their faces pressed to the window of the dance studio (which is so much more entertaining than him dancing to showtunes, btw.) Ok, so maybe I do like him, so what?
Gah, no idea what to do. Help?