♞ Equius Zahhak ♐ 2 HorsePOWER ♐ [Audio + Text] ♞

[lordsweatyhorse]

[The feed clicks on, followed by a brief stint of silence. Oh no, wait. That's just Equius breathing. And then him speaking quietly.]

...I have been given my second order. I will follow it precisely. Do you hear me, overlord?

...I am obeying.

[...That part was meant to be for Val only, but. Like Equius has time to filter things.]

Comments

[sw33t_just1c3]

JUST ON3 QU3ST1ON

1F 1 TOOK SOM3 W4T3R OUTS1D3
M4D3 MUD
STOMP3D 4ROUND 1N 1T
4ND C4M3 TO YOUR SU1T3
WOULD TH4T B3 4 V3RY T3RR1BL3 TH1NG? >8]

[lordsweatyhorse]

D --> Why w001d my opinion matter, Lady Pyrope
D --> You may do as you please to my suite and my respiteblock
D --> But one as low as myself deserves to wallow in mud
D --> So that w001d be nothing but a good thing

D --> And I w001d still kiss your boots
D --> If that is what you wanted

[sw33t_just1c3]

[Please hold. Equius can probably hear her laughter coming from all the way downstairs. She needs a moment to compose herself.]

4ND 1F YOUR L4DY D3M4ND3D YOU TO L1CK TH3 MUD FROM H3R SHO3S?

[lordsweatyhorse]

[He is just sweating and shivering right now, Terezi. YOU'RE MEAN. BUT YOU'RE ALSO INDULGING HIS FETISH RIGHT NOW. DEAL WITH THAT.]

D --> Then I w001d oblige her wish with a smile on my scum-b100ded face

[caligulasaqua]

wwoww
that wwas awwful equius just plain awwful
wwhy do you guys evven keep DOIN these thins i dont evven get it

[lordsweatyhorse]

D --> Was it awful
D --> Tr001y
D --> How c001d I possibly make it better, Lord Ampora
D --> Just tell me
D --> Your wish is my command

[caligulasaqua]

i dont knoww pretty much anythin wwould make it less disgustin
i mean really i knoww youre a stupid land dwweller but youre still better than this

[lordsweatyhorse]

D --> But what
D --> I'm not intelligent enough to know how to improve it on my own
D --> Someone of noble b100d like yourself will need to tell me

D --> I'm certain I'm not better than this
D --> And I never hoof been

[dyingwings]

In the long run, you know, it doesn't matter quite so much.

Peasant or lord, I make no exception.

[lordsweatyhorse]

D --> What doesn't matter

[dyingwings]

Blood. Ancestry. Whatever you seem to be making such a fuss about.

Just thought I'd fill you in before you let someone take advantage of you for it.

[lordsweatyhorse]

D --> They matter very much on Alternia
D --> So even if you tell me something like that, I'm not inclined to believe it

D --> My lady

[sufferheir]

WHAT
THE FUCK
IS THIS

[lordsweatyhorse]

D --> Lord Vantas
D --> Were you in need of praise

[sufferheir]

YOU SAY THAT LIKE IT ISN'T EVERYONE'S NATURAL INSTINCTIVE REACTION TO MY PRESENCE.
I SWEAR TO GOD I MUST EMIT SOME KIND OF NOXIOUS CLOUD OF WONDER INSPIRING SPORES.

BUT SERIOUSLY, THAT'S A GOOD LOOK FOR YOU!
IT'S TOO BAD THAT MY IRREVERENT JOY AT SEEING YOU WRITHE AROUND IN THE DIRT IS LESSENED BY THE FACT THAT IT'S DUE TO THIS PLACES' UNCARING ROBO-REGIME.

ALSO THE FACT THAT YOU'RE PROBABLY GET OFF ON IT, SOMEHOW.

[lordsweatyhorse]

D --> I am endlessly glad that you're enjoying my suffering, Lord
D --> Tell me more about how much you love my pain and

[He's shocked. There's a small pause.]

D --> W001d you like me to do aneighthing for you
D --> Aneighthing at all
D --> Or w001d you just like to continue to tell me how wretched I am

[Video]

[marriedatoilet]

Er....

What?

[text]

[lordsweatyhorse]

D --> Precisely what I said, my lady
D --> Did you require me to praise you
D --> Or worship you
D --> Or do anything else for you, no matter how menial

[video]

[marriedatoilet]

Oh. Er. Is she forcing you to write like that as well?

[video]

[lordsweatyhorse]

D --> In this color, yes
D --> Normally I w001d type in b100, but I

[He's shocked by his collar.]

D --> I mean no, this is my b100d color
D --> Why w001d I type differently