41 ♊ Sollux Captor ♊ Audio

[psionichax0r]

In case none of you dipshits noticed these giant oozing assholes, this place is actually dangerous. We should probably stick together so that we don't all die the first week because of something stupid, but I know how you're all allergic to each other, so I'm guessing none of you will actually take that advice

Comments

[audio]

[sw33t_just1c3]

[There's the sound of a jetpack in use in the background. Someone is in the air right now.]

I think 'getting myself killed like a pack of morons' is something you can safely assume would never happen! But I appreciate the concern.

[audio]

[psionichax0r]

Okay, well getting killed like the only smart person in a room of bumbling idiots, how does that sound? Strike you as any more accurate?

[audio]

[sw33t_just1c3]

Almost, but not quite. You are still missing the mark with the getting killed at all part!

How are you doing?

[audio]

[psionichax0r]

Fine I guess? The monsters here aren't a big deal for me, but I'm worried about everyone else.

[audio]

[sw33t_just1c3]

Everyone else can sit on the train if they can't handle the monsters! Jegus, it is not like most places we go to aren't crawling with monsters and other horror creatures.

[audio]

[psionichax0r]

I don't know. This place seems worse than normal, but what the hell do I know. Where are you?

[audio]

[sw33t_just1c3]

Up in the air, dhurr! I am checking everything out before I find a place to set up shop. What about you?

Re: [audio]

[psionichax0r]

Boat.

Just. Just don't ask. Please.

Look if you find anything good will you let me know? I'm trying to find a place we could set up camp.

[audio]

[sw33t_just1c3]

[Sollux, you should know better than to tell Terezi not to ask about something.]

Boat? As in Vriska's boat, or are we talking about a different boat?

I haven't found anything but monster-infested lands and that noisy firetrain. And I'm not staying on that thing.

Re: [audio]

[psionichax0r]

No. A different boat. But yeah thank you for reminding me of the spider bitch that inspired this huge fuckinghassle of a boat search in the first place.

Yeah the train is a nightmare, but the monsters seem to be pretty much everywhere. Which is bullshit, but hey, what isn't in this hellhole?

[audio]

[sw33t_just1c3]

This is the Land of Monsters and Bullshit. Our resident Squire of Fuck You is absent, but we are free to traverse his joyous landscape.

And you're welcome. Why would you even need a boat?

[audio]

[psionichax0r]

[okay well when you put it like that. he has to laugh]

Sucks, I wanted to give him this psionic beating I'd been saving up. Don't think anyone else deserves it more.

[except maybe eridan. FUCKING BOATS. sigh]

I need the boat because... I can't even tell you why I need the boat, because you will just call me dumb and stupid and make it worse and I'd just really like this stupid fucking thing not to get any worse. I swear to gog sometimes it's like I am on Troll Three's Company, but instead of the high blood just killing his lowblood hivemate at the end of every episode he's at the mercy of the two fucking most retarded sea dwellers to ever exist, keeping him alive only because they take joy in teaming up on him and making him do dumb shit.

[audio]

[sw33t_just1c3]

[Terezi really can't help herself, so don't mind too much when she starts laughing.] Sollux. Are you telling me that you are catering to Eridan and Feferi's penchant for doing ridiculous things? Please tell me that is the thing that you were describing! I am pretty sure the humans have come up with a quaint term for this! It is called 'being whipped'.

[More laughter.] I really should taste this for myself!

[audio]

[psionichax0r]

Fuck off. And tell your tongue to fuck off too. There isn't even anything to taste here. Nothing but more bullshit land.

[audio]

[sw33t_just1c3]

Hehe, there is plenty to taste! Do I have to come find you to sample it myself? Is that what you are implying with the gratuitous fucks you are offing?