Abyss Guest Post: Day 1

[skinners_box]

Welcome to Day 1 of Abyss! This is where guest writers can have their characters post to the network. These posts will be handled the same way as any other post to the network, but we'll keep them grouped together for everyone's sanity.

All guest characters arrived in Abyss with a communicator that resembles a Blackberry. These have text, video,

Comments

Video

[heartboners]

Inherently the dilemma with these keyboards is that they're not built for dinosaurs. To that I say:

What the frig, keyboard designers?! Dinosaurs are an important market for any computer developer to be working with!

[termcapricious]

Bro.

You're a fucking dinosaur.

Holy shit, fucking miracles all up in this bitch.

[heartboners]

I repeat, but this time louder to draw the attention of keyboard designers!

What! The! Frig!

[termcapricious]

Man, I fuckin' know right? Even the little keys are giving me a fuckin' problem.

You oughta like, write a letter motherfucker. Tell them the business but, you know, in a not too harsh way so they'll listen.

[heartboners]

But here we reach the deeper dilemma- To type a letter, I'd need to use a keyboard! This is reaching untold levels of frigtasticly frigged, cats and kittens!

[termcapricious]

Well what about like, a pen motherfucker? You attach a pen to a stick or some shit and you're like, "whoa, I can reach the paper with this pen".

Fuckin magic, bro, and your problem is solved.

[heartboners]

The rabbit hole keeps getting deeper and deeper, Uta-- small person!!! The pen industry is equally yet different corrupt!

[termcapricious]

Shit.

Fuckin' really?

And I'm Gamzee bro. You can fuckin' call me that.

[heartboners]

Friggin' really!!!! Pens are far too small for my masculine dinosaur grip!!

[termcapricious]

Well, why don't you train like, a fuckin' parrot or some shit to sing a message to them? Like, parrots are smart and shit, aren't they? Maybe they'll fuckin' listen to that, broasaurus Rex.

[heartboners]

I- I'm scared of birds

[termcapricious]

Dude, you don't need to be scared of no fuckin' birds.

'cept pelicans. But they ain't scary. Just assholes.

[heartboners]

Pelicans are what's wrong with society today!

[termcapricious]

Shit bro.

Motherfuckers used to try and steal shit from me all the time on the beach. I'm usually pretty chill, you know, not given a fuck. But gogdamn, wish they'd just ask me for cottan candy instead of just taking it.

[heartboners]

Pelicans are what's wrong with society today- a thesis!!!

by t-rex

[termcapricious]

Oh shit motherfucker.

Totally read that.