☽ Twenty-Seven Holes in the Moon // Video
Does, uh, anyone here know how to...go about making yourself forget things? Like, really shitty things. Is there a way to do that? Does anyone have powers that can make that happen? Just curious.
[Locked 20% to Lucas, Nepeta, and Jade]
Alright, Nepeta and Jade? I guess I owe you kids an apology. Jade, I know you don't know what happened anymore but I was...really cruel to you and Nepeta because I felt that Lucas was spending too much time with you. I've had really bad experiences with my own parents and it made me resentful to see any other kids getting cared for like that.
I figured that if I forced you away from him he'd turn his attention towards me and I'd be fixed and everything would be okay. But it's...not as easy as just taking away people he cares about. You can decide who you are, but you can never decide how other people react to you, and taking other people away...doesn't mean anyone'll just let you take their place.
And even if I could, I don't think that'd work. I think I might be beyond the point of being fixed right now. I'm trying, but I don't know if I can stop myself from being like this. From hurting people like this. But I'm sorry for it. And I'm sorry if I do anything else. Sometimes the only satisfaction I can get out of life is to make other people suffer the way I have. Maybe I just don't deserve happiness if that's the way I have to get it.
Jade, there's nothing wrong with Lucas. He isn't bad, and anyone would be lucky to hang out with him. He'd never hurt anyone he cared about on purpose. He'd die before he'd hurt you. The only thing he did "wrong" was that he...cared about you so, so much when you were here last time, and it did hurt me, and it made me jealous, but that's my problem, not his.
I hope you can accept my apology, but I understand if you can't. Either way, I won't stop you from spending time with Lucas any more. I'll just try to ignore it.
[Locked 20% to Lucas, Nepeta, and Jade]
Alright, Nepeta and Jade? I guess I owe you kids an apology. Jade, I know you don't know what happened anymore but I was...really cruel to you and Nepeta because I felt that Lucas was spending too much time with you. I've had really bad experiences with my own parents and it made me resentful to see any other kids getting cared for like that.
I figured that if I forced you away from him he'd turn his attention towards me and I'd be fixed and everything would be okay. But it's...not as easy as just taking away people he cares about. You can decide who you are, but you can never decide how other people react to you, and taking other people away...doesn't mean anyone'll just let you take their place.
And even if I could, I don't think that'd work. I think I might be beyond the point of being fixed right now. I'm trying, but I don't know if I can stop myself from being like this. From hurting people like this. But I'm sorry for it. And I'm sorry if I do anything else. Sometimes the only satisfaction I can get out of life is to make other people suffer the way I have. Maybe I just don't deserve happiness if that's the way I have to get it.
Jade, there's nothing wrong with Lucas. He isn't bad, and anyone would be lucky to hang out with him. He'd never hurt anyone he cared about on purpose. He'd die before he'd hurt you. The only thing he did "wrong" was that he...cared about you so, so much when you were here last time, and it did hurt me, and it made me jealous, but that's my problem, not his.
I hope you can accept my apology, but I understand if you can't. Either way, I won't stop you from spending time with Lucas any more. I'll just try to ignore it.