I'm sorry...
I'm bruised and I'm broken. I hurt all over and I wish I could erase the last few days.
I've waited so long to hear you whisper those three words in my ear, and when the moment finally came I didn't feel the same way. I said I did, but I lied. I'm sorry for lying to you, I really am. And so now I've lost you once and for all. I'm sorry, but I can't be your second pick. I'm sick of that. And now, because of this whole mess, I've lost the first person that I've cared about since I met you.
I just want to fix this. I've never regretted anything more. I wish you could know how deeply my heart aches right now. I know that all the words I've said haven't made it better and I know that I'm not deserving of a second chance. And I don't just want to be your friend but I know that I'll be lucky to even have you in my life at all. I know that you will probably never learn to trust me, and that you're feelings for me will probably never be complete as they could have been. I also know that you will never read this, but I just wish you were here right now so that I could cry in your arms and whisper 'I'm sorry' over and over again. I wish that right now we were still sitting on that broken lawn chair trying to find the small dipper. I wish so many things and I want so many things. Know that I choose you and only you and that I'd rather be alone than be with someone else.
I'm leaving this entry public in hopes that you might stumble across it...
- [i need you.]
I've waited so long to hear you whisper those three words in my ear, and when the moment finally came I didn't feel the same way. I said I did, but I lied. I'm sorry for lying to you, I really am. And so now I've lost you once and for all. I'm sorry, but I can't be your second pick. I'm sick of that. And now, because of this whole mess, I've lost the first person that I've cared about since I met you.
I just want to fix this. I've never regretted anything more. I wish you could know how deeply my heart aches right now. I know that all the words I've said haven't made it better and I know that I'm not deserving of a second chance. And I don't just want to be your friend but I know that I'll be lucky to even have you in my life at all. I know that you will probably never learn to trust me, and that you're feelings for me will probably never be complete as they could have been. I also know that you will never read this, but I just wish you were here right now so that I could cry in your arms and whisper 'I'm sorry' over and over again. I wish that right now we were still sitting on that broken lawn chair trying to find the small dipper. I wish so many things and I want so many things. Know that I choose you and only you and that I'd rather be alone than be with someone else.
I'm leaving this entry public in hopes that you might stumble across it...
- [i need you.]