saturday...first of may
well today i think i was supposed to have soft ball practice, but i didn't go b/c i wasn't sure and it was raining. and people never called me back lol. so then i felt kinda bad b/c i already missed the first practice...b/c i signed up late. so yeah, i better catch the next practive then, eh? at first i was really afraid, b/c usually i am afriad of new things like this plus i suck at sports, but now i am really excited. especially b/c i know that andy can come watch me...high light of my life hehe. and my parents are like really proud of me, for some reason. my mom is b/c i am trying new things, and b/c it is through church, and my dad is b/c he was a major jock back in the day, and none of us are. i think that dissapoints him in a way. actually, it's the only reason i swam for two years, for my dad. i used to dance to, but that was b/c i liked it. hehe. oh yeah...i still need to get a glove and stuff like that. i better take care of all that this week sometime.
i feel really selfish...talking about my day like this. at least i have a day to talk about. at least i didn't hang my self. at least my best friend didn't kill themselves, only for every one talk about it, like they even knew. I mean yeah, i am sad, and it's so scary and read and i can't belive any of it. but still, i didn't know her. so i am not gonna pretend like we were tight, or like i knew what really happened. all i know is that it's really too bad for her and all the people she left behind. But then i feel so lucky for all i have. i'm still here and i have a really good life. for one second, i wouldn't dream of changing any of it. i have a good future ahead of me, and people who love me, and who i love very much. it just seems like any complaints that i make are irrelevant, b/c i am still around to make them, and some of us are not.
but that's my little ironic insight for now.
in other news, i am reading a really good book called the case for christ. i already am saved, but it is really interesting anyway. plus, it's full of info that i never knew before, like actually factul proff that jesus was god. I especially recomend it for non belivers, i think it could change your mind, at least a little. this book, is that good. and it's really happy, it shows ways how to be a better christain and grow in your spirtiuality and also is a really big picker upper. it talkes about the word of god too, somthing else i like, since i get confused if i read the bible on my own. this is a very read. then hopefully i'll finally get to finish the purpose driven life, another life changer. hehe. i am really happy right now if you can't tell.
well i have happy news about my dear bbf kristin. let's just say that my job has been fulfilled. and then last night i got to see andy. and he made me cookies that were really yummy. he had to go to his grandparents house today, which sucked for me, but at least i got to talk to him a little (not nearly enough) and i will get to see him tommorow and give him his phone back. lol. those were the best cookies that i've ever eaten. wow i love that boy. i can't wait until we get married. i know i keep saying it, but it's ture. it gets harder and harder to say good bye to him every day. if i can't see him on a certeain day, it just sucks and i get sad, and sick. it's really bad. oh, and we still need a lot of pray about his parents "approving" of out relationship. i just want every thing to be cool. they are going to be my parents in laws, so i'd like this to be easy now, rather than uncomfterble later. plus, andy and i get really stressed out by them sometimes. then it is emoness all over the place.
well i am tired so i am going to go to bed. andy i love you so much. talk to you later, and i hope i see you all day every day really soon. ooooooo i miss him. i love you baby.
i feel really selfish...talking about my day like this. at least i have a day to talk about. at least i didn't hang my self. at least my best friend didn't kill themselves, only for every one talk about it, like they even knew. I mean yeah, i am sad, and it's so scary and read and i can't belive any of it. but still, i didn't know her. so i am not gonna pretend like we were tight, or like i knew what really happened. all i know is that it's really too bad for her and all the people she left behind. But then i feel so lucky for all i have. i'm still here and i have a really good life. for one second, i wouldn't dream of changing any of it. i have a good future ahead of me, and people who love me, and who i love very much. it just seems like any complaints that i make are irrelevant, b/c i am still around to make them, and some of us are not.
but that's my little ironic insight for now.
in other news, i am reading a really good book called the case for christ. i already am saved, but it is really interesting anyway. plus, it's full of info that i never knew before, like actually factul proff that jesus was god. I especially recomend it for non belivers, i think it could change your mind, at least a little. this book, is that good. and it's really happy, it shows ways how to be a better christain and grow in your spirtiuality and also is a really big picker upper. it talkes about the word of god too, somthing else i like, since i get confused if i read the bible on my own. this is a very read. then hopefully i'll finally get to finish the purpose driven life, another life changer. hehe. i am really happy right now if you can't tell.
well i have happy news about my dear bbf kristin. let's just say that my job has been fulfilled. and then last night i got to see andy. and he made me cookies that were really yummy. he had to go to his grandparents house today, which sucked for me, but at least i got to talk to him a little (not nearly enough) and i will get to see him tommorow and give him his phone back. lol. those were the best cookies that i've ever eaten. wow i love that boy. i can't wait until we get married. i know i keep saying it, but it's ture. it gets harder and harder to say good bye to him every day. if i can't see him on a certeain day, it just sucks and i get sad, and sick. it's really bad. oh, and we still need a lot of pray about his parents "approving" of out relationship. i just want every thing to be cool. they are going to be my parents in laws, so i'd like this to be easy now, rather than uncomfterble later. plus, andy and i get really stressed out by them sometimes. then it is emoness all over the place.
well i am tired so i am going to go to bed. andy i love you so much. talk to you later, and i hope i see you all day every day really soon. ooooooo i miss him. i love you baby.