UGH
I spent a few minutes pondering this and I realized that humanity is such a fucking waste of time. You spend your whole life hearing all this shit about how you're still you no matter what, that you're loved no matter what.. all kinds of fucking bullshit like that, but it doesn't mean a thing. It's all a big fucking facade because all anyone cares about is being "normal." i mean, what the fuck is normal anyway?
I'm just jumping back and forth between things right now so just disregard this post entirely. I just needed to write some things out.
I like having fun you know? it's not like.. bad.. or anything. I like girls as well as boys but according to my mother, that's disgusting. Did you all know that i'm disgusting?? Well yeah, I am. i'm a big disgusting freak. I told my mother about liking this girl.. she said it was just a phase. that i'd grow out of it.
i'm so fucking pissed off right now. and the strangest thing is that I aren't running to get any alcohol in me. maybe i will in a few minutes. I dont know.
I just know that I wish SOMEBODY, my new confidant (he knows who he is), was home for me to talk to.
Maybe I was wrong in everything i've ever said. Maybe all my advice about things working out was just shit. maybe i'm just young and naive and im wrong in everything i ever said.
Scott, maybe you're right to question everything. maybe being pessimistic and cynical is the way to go. Why even try at all when nothing ever turns out right? How could I have been so blind?
well fuck that.. if i'm a disgusting pessimistic nobody I should live like one. Anyone in the mood to get thier life ruined? And hell if i'm already going down the path to hell, why not go all the way? Who has the drugs around here? Somebody?
Anybody?
I'm just jumping back and forth between things right now so just disregard this post entirely. I just needed to write some things out.
I like having fun you know? it's not like.. bad.. or anything. I like girls as well as boys but according to my mother, that's disgusting. Did you all know that i'm disgusting?? Well yeah, I am. i'm a big disgusting freak. I told my mother about liking this girl.. she said it was just a phase. that i'd grow out of it.
i'm so fucking pissed off right now. and the strangest thing is that I aren't running to get any alcohol in me. maybe i will in a few minutes. I dont know.
I just know that I wish SOMEBODY, my new confidant (he knows who he is), was home for me to talk to.
Maybe I was wrong in everything i've ever said. Maybe all my advice about things working out was just shit. maybe i'm just young and naive and im wrong in everything i ever said.
Scott, maybe you're right to question everything. maybe being pessimistic and cynical is the way to go. Why even try at all when nothing ever turns out right? How could I have been so blind?
well fuck that.. if i'm a disgusting pessimistic nobody I should live like one. Anyone in the mood to get thier life ruined? And hell if i'm already going down the path to hell, why not go all the way? Who has the drugs around here? Somebody?
Anybody?