'your mum uses a shaver to shave off her moustache'
So yesterday, me kerry and laura went on our monthly shopping trip to manchester. We were at the train station on time, we were there and everything and still managed to miss our train. Cheeky bastards at the train station.. they won't tell you if your train's here or if it changes platform or anything they will do you out of anything.. i tells ya. Once on the train, we had a few comedy moments talking about aprils fools tricks and when this man came and sat next to us. Under our breathe we said things such as 'up the arse' and 'suck my... ' ha ha. i hope he didn't hear us cause that would have been slightly cruel but we didn't mean to be. Shortly after, he moved. Laura says it was because he saw us laughing but i think it was because he wanted to sit next to his mum. we have a problem. with laughing. we always laugh when we aren't meant to and we can't help it. i think it makes us laugh even more!
Anyways once in manchester, we headed for exit and tortured ourselves looking at the things we couldn't afford. There were some proper shexay hats aswell. Next, we went to afflecks and went to the badge shop. We found this totally orgasmic the used badge and naturally had to buy one each. We wandered around a few more shops and then went to the bead shop.. which is THE shop. We first found it absolutely ages ago when we purchased our string and beads for our plec neclace but since we haven't really had much money. We ended up spending about an hour in there.. as there is so much to choose from and me luffs it. Then kerry went and bought THE t-shirt. It was an absolute bargain and is amazing. It has come to be known as the nazi top [please note:no offence is intended here.. i will explain later where it came from. we are not racist]. We went round a few more shops and have come to the conclusion that you find the dodgyest people in manchester. You always get the comedy people doing something for money. This time, there was a man on the floor totally pissed attempting to sing! Then, we came across this guy who was like talking to himself and acting out some kind of scene. We were mesmerised and stood watching him for about 10 minutes ha ha!
When we went into the shopping centre.. they had these bouncer things on trampolines where people went in them and went really high. We well wanted to have a go but it was £5 a go.. scandalous! When we were walking to the food court, me and kerry walked past this shop that had a t-shirt in the window saying 'texas is for lovers' in the fob style.. we were like what an absolute rip-off. Then i heard senses fail playing..and we realised it was coming from topshop!! we couldn't believe it and were in absolute shock!
We went to the triangle and had to walk the whole way round because the water thingy at the front wasn't working and it is a well-known tradition that we put our hands under he water! When we were in freespirit, this song came on that goes 'all i ever wanted, all i ever needed' nope i know what you're thinking it wasn't three quarters.. in fact kerry thought it was meatloaf ha ha ha. I thought it was Moz at first and couldn't think what it was.. until i went home and discovered it was enjoy the silence by depeche mode! I'm sure lots more happened but it's like 2 in the morning and i can't really remember.
The train home.. now this was eventful. At first we had to stand because there were no seats grr but we then we managed to find some seats. Me and kerry were happily sorting out our beads when we heard the woman behind us saying 'oh look there's wolverhampton' and such we were like wtf and were joining in by quietly saying it to ourselves. Then we heard her say 'oh yeah.. a shaver.. that's what your mum uses to shave her moustache off'. we were like wtf and died for about fifty years hahahaha, twas soo funny. Those kids are gonna go home now and shave their faces off. It's not right i tell ya. Then after they had gone there were some kids behind us who were getting upto some major tomfoolery.. we just kept hearing things as 'don't sit on me like that.. you're hurting me'. I know they were only kids but we couldn't help but have a chuckle. Whilst this was going on, i managed to drop my beads everywhere about fifty times and kerry dropped hers once aswell hahaha. Then kerry whipped out her top. It has lots of different japanese symbols on it and kerry was like 'i don't a clue what any of this means what if i'm walking around wearing a really offensive top.' Then she was like ' i bet it says something like you fackin nazi' or 'you fackin gay' hahaha which is said in an accent inspired by both avid merrion and barat and is the best thing ever. Then once that had started that was it.. but then we were like we hope people don't think we are being proper offensive and racist cause we don't mean to be and i was telling kerry she was going to get arrested hahaha. There were other sayings but i'm afraid they are waaaay too offensive to be put in my journal. I know it's slightly offensive.. okay maybe very.. but it's soo funny and makes me laugh for ages. Especially, cause we don't actually know what the top says and there are sooo many possibilities.
Before we went we saw a certain SS we recognised and had a chuckle to ourselves before going on our merry way.