Evergreen Terrace
So this is my second attempt to free myself from a mentally agrivating weekend full of surprises, emotional valleys and hills, and out-of-character actions. It's almost like it's my mind up here -- the center of all thought and emotion. It forces me to look upon those feelings that are out of the ordinary and face them with a courageous heart and mind, trying to discover the ones that will better me.
[Or could this just be my mind trying to re-create the movie scenes and script that I so long for in a real-life setting -- mine]
Have you ever created scenarios in your head that reflect feelings you wish to have? or pity wished to feel from those around you?
Have you ever created terrible situations in your head that demand sympathy and love from those you cherish most?
I have. I feel psychotic in doing so, too. They're terrible ... almost death wishes. Mine or someone else's. Ok, we're done here.
I got some sad news this evening that I thougth I'd never hear again. I thought it was gone and resolved. Over with. I will not share this but I wish I could express it so badly. So why am I even writing it here? ... finished again.
I dont know who to be. Or who to try to be. I dont know who I need to be, or who I want to be. How do I even function? Lucky for me, school is on hold for about 3 months. One less thing to worry about and to drop from my routine life.
I really dont feel like writing anything more than you will all see. Maybe a secret journal? Yeah, the other one.
Farewell and Godspeed.
I want you to talk to me. -- all and any of you.
[Or could this just be my mind trying to re-create the movie scenes and script that I so long for in a real-life setting -- mine]
Have you ever created scenarios in your head that reflect feelings you wish to have? or pity wished to feel from those around you?
Have you ever created terrible situations in your head that demand sympathy and love from those you cherish most?
I have. I feel psychotic in doing so, too. They're terrible ... almost death wishes. Mine or someone else's. Ok, we're done here.
I got some sad news this evening that I thougth I'd never hear again. I thought it was gone and resolved. Over with. I will not share this but I wish I could express it so badly. So why am I even writing it here? ... finished again.
I dont know who to be. Or who to try to be. I dont know who I need to be, or who I want to be. How do I even function? Lucky for me, school is on hold for about 3 months. One less thing to worry about and to drop from my routine life.
I really dont feel like writing anything more than you will all see. Maybe a secret journal? Yeah, the other one.
Farewell and Godspeed.
I want you to talk to me. -- all and any of you.