(no subject)
A lot has happened.
A lot has not been good.
I've gotten it pushed in my face too many times for me to stand.
And no one understands why I become reserved when it's mentioned.
I did something, regret it and it makes me feel like shit.
My parents praise it, but hate me for it too.
I'm guilty and I'm taking all the blame and punishment.
I'm lucky to be alive.
If you can call me that now.
I'm falling back into old ways.
I've still held true to a promise that has stood through a fight.
I'm falling hard.
I miss too many people.
I'm about to tear my knee off my leg and throw at it people's heads.
Tomorrow I want to stay home and catch up on homework.
I'm becoming the "old" me.
The one that was from ninth grade-ish.
I've learned too many things to comprehend in my brain over a course of 4 days.
I live my life hypocrytically and contradictivly.
I'm sorry to anyone I've hurt in the past few weeks.
I wish I could say that I'm still happy with who I am.
I guess it was just someone putting thoughts into my head when I was so happy.
That person has not vanished completely, but vanished in that way in my life.
I need help.
My dad doens't think that.
I want to talk, but there's no one.
I need medication for illnesses that I have. (ADD, ADHD)
My foot's all tingly.
My calf/shin is hot.
Those are 2 signs that somethings wrong with my leg.
My parents don't care about that.
I like how I can sit and cry in my room.
I have no one to talk to and no one will attempt to talk to me.
I hate my life.
I hate myself.
I'm sorry to everyone.
A lot has not been good.
I've gotten it pushed in my face too many times for me to stand.
And no one understands why I become reserved when it's mentioned.
I did something, regret it and it makes me feel like shit.
My parents praise it, but hate me for it too.
I'm guilty and I'm taking all the blame and punishment.
I'm lucky to be alive.
If you can call me that now.
I'm falling back into old ways.
I've still held true to a promise that has stood through a fight.
I'm falling hard.
I miss too many people.
I'm about to tear my knee off my leg and throw at it people's heads.
Tomorrow I want to stay home and catch up on homework.
I'm becoming the "old" me.
The one that was from ninth grade-ish.
I've learned too many things to comprehend in my brain over a course of 4 days.
I live my life hypocrytically and contradictivly.
I'm sorry to anyone I've hurt in the past few weeks.
I wish I could say that I'm still happy with who I am.
I guess it was just someone putting thoughts into my head when I was so happy.
That person has not vanished completely, but vanished in that way in my life.
I need help.
My dad doens't think that.
I want to talk, but there's no one.
I need medication for illnesses that I have. (ADD, ADHD)
My foot's all tingly.
My calf/shin is hot.
Those are 2 signs that somethings wrong with my leg.
My parents don't care about that.
I like how I can sit and cry in my room.
I have no one to talk to and no one will attempt to talk to me.
I hate my life.
I hate myself.
I'm sorry to everyone.