(no subject)
kso anyway
ugh
today sucked
I don't know what's wrong with me
I got really upset today because my mom yelled at me because I wanted to come home again
I get so frustrated because I want to go home so bad it hurts and I can't seem to justify it to people
But I know it's right, I know that that's what I want
Even if I can't always explain why
I was so upset today, I went to the assistant house mother person to talk to her, and she kept questioning me about how I want to go home and I was starting to get mad. Because I couldn't get her to comprehend why I didn't want to be here and ugh. I don't even know.
And sh kept saying how I wasn't trying. But I have been trying, really hard. LIke I went out trick or treating with at my friend CAssie's house and Jamie, Jill, and Chloe came too. It really wasn't bad, It was fun actaually. But I just come back and I feel worse than ever. And I don't know why.
So I come back to my room, and I'm listening to Aerials. Which fits my mood perfectly, it's like my life right now. And I can't really explain why agian. But it does and it is.
I dunno I'm always looking fo far and wide to make myself happy.
I wanted to come here because I thought it would make me happy
And well. That turned out well...
Maybe I missed something somewhere
I have this 'bad habit' I guess
I don't always think in words
Like in math class I get asked a question and I'll figure out the answer without consciously think about it, so I'll know the answer and I'll know I'm right but I don't know why.
And sometimes it's not even as simple as math where there's a straight answers, sometimes the point is just a sort of really distinct feeling. Sometimes it's really important too, and I just can't find words to convey things and I dunno. I get so frustrated with words sometimes.
I dunno, maybe it happens to everyone and I'm just stupid about it.
Maybe that's why I like music so much. It's not ugly with words. It's emotion, and it's has freedom, to change and mean different things to diffrent people at different times. Not like ugly fat words that just sit on their figurative arses and mean something.
I don't know anything.
ugh
today sucked
I don't know what's wrong with me
I got really upset today because my mom yelled at me because I wanted to come home again
I get so frustrated because I want to go home so bad it hurts and I can't seem to justify it to people
But I know it's right, I know that that's what I want
Even if I can't always explain why
I was so upset today, I went to the assistant house mother person to talk to her, and she kept questioning me about how I want to go home and I was starting to get mad. Because I couldn't get her to comprehend why I didn't want to be here and ugh. I don't even know.
And sh kept saying how I wasn't trying. But I have been trying, really hard. LIke I went out trick or treating with at my friend CAssie's house and Jamie, Jill, and Chloe came too. It really wasn't bad, It was fun actaually. But I just come back and I feel worse than ever. And I don't know why.
So I come back to my room, and I'm listening to Aerials. Which fits my mood perfectly, it's like my life right now. And I can't really explain why agian. But it does and it is.
I dunno I'm always looking fo far and wide to make myself happy.
I wanted to come here because I thought it would make me happy
And well. That turned out well...
Maybe I missed something somewhere
I have this 'bad habit' I guess
I don't always think in words
Like in math class I get asked a question and I'll figure out the answer without consciously think about it, so I'll know the answer and I'll know I'm right but I don't know why.
And sometimes it's not even as simple as math where there's a straight answers, sometimes the point is just a sort of really distinct feeling. Sometimes it's really important too, and I just can't find words to convey things and I dunno. I get so frustrated with words sometimes.
I dunno, maybe it happens to everyone and I'm just stupid about it.
Maybe that's why I like music so much. It's not ugly with words. It's emotion, and it's has freedom, to change and mean different things to diffrent people at different times. Not like ugly fat words that just sit on their figurative arses and mean something.
I don't know anything.