the saddest thing...
so i was sitting in the drivethru line at taco bell. my stomach was growling. it was 12.30, i was used to eating lunch at around 11. i ordered a spicy chicken burrito and a regular hard taco. no drink. i already had a vanilla coke. :) and i look out my window, to the back of the taco bell building, and there's this guy standing there, behind a shopping cart that was overflowing with his belongings. i noticed a pillow, and a blanket, on the bottom of the cart, which immediately told me that this man was undoubtedly homeless. he had a dog with him. he was rummaging thru his cart looking for something. then he pulled out 2 clear but rather grimey plastic bowls. one was empty, and the other had dry dog food in it. he set them both down in the shade for the dog, as he wrapped the dog's leash around a telephone pole. by now i was staring. i couldn't help it. this is not something u see all that often in midland, which is a town full of rather well-off people. i watched him, as he dug thru his stuff again. this time he pulled out a gallon jug, and did the weirdest thing. he just looked at it. looked at the dog, looked back at the jug, opened it, looked at the dog, took a tiny sip for himself, and poured the rest of his water into the dog's empty water bowl. it was the saddest thing i've seen in quite a while.
i was next in line. and then i got my food, still thinking of the guy that was now out of sight, 20 feet behind me, blocked by the building. i looked down at my $20 bill, and then i turned right, instead of left (which is the way back to work). i went to kmart. just down the street. bought a small bag of dog food, and a gallon of water. i went back, and gave it to the guy. along with my taco bell. i wasn't hungry anymore. i talked with him for a little while. his name is john. he was very timid, and shy. but he just kept thanking me over and over again. i didn't want his thanks. i wanted him to eat. that's it. then i thanked him for talking with me, which he thought was really strange, and i drove back to work.
i complain about my life a lot. especially in this journal. but things like what i witnessed today keep me thankful. there are a lot of good things happening in my life right now. i need to appreciate what i have more often. i am extremely grateful for the opportunities i've been given that have allowed me to become the person that i am today. i've never been an overly compassionate person. it's so strange to think that john's appearance made more difference to me, than my small meal probably did to him. i wish i could do more....