Panic Attack or Flashback?

[wildwordwomyn]

Monday night, after watching a movie that involved incest, I had either a panic attack or a flashback. All I know is I was in bed and I started getting really scared and crying and my body shook for quite a while. My girlfriend moved in with me on Sunday so a couple friends think that brought it on. Maybe it did, but I'm thinking it was more about

Comments

I'm so sorry this happenned to you...

[igosm]

Panic Attack or flash back - it is a distinction without a difference in this case (It would be both) This process of feeling scared and crying is processing the hurt of before. I personally think it's a healthy thing to work through the emotions of before. It sounds like you don't actually remember how it was then so you probably dealt with the shock of it all by freezing yourself, freezing the memory. Why did you freeze? Lot's of people freeze. They freeze when they cannot run and hide when nothing they do will avoid something awful. So you freeze (leaving your body a bit I'd wager) and you do it in order to protect your core. You were surviving. That's why you froze. Now you are grown and the abuse is over and you have to heal. You have to heal in order to rise above what happenned to you. The very best revenge... The way to GET EVEN. Is to have a full life with all that intails. But unfairly you have to work to get back to zero. You have to process the memories and the feelings. You have to come to terms with it and work out the reactions to things.

I cannot say whether it would be better for you to avoid things that trigger this response. Maybe it's better for you to indulge, react and then process.. I don't know, it's something you'd have to work through with a counselor of some type.

I do know, from listening to your stories and other stories that you did nothing wrong. That for some reason fighting back was not available to you at the time. You were a victim then, a survivor now. Now you would make better choices, I hope that you are working for that. I am praying that you never need make that kind of a choice again. May your life be peaceful here out and filled with joy. I wish that for every body.. Enough with the abuse eh???

Emma

Re: I'm so sorry this happenned to you...

[wildwordwomyn]

Oh, thank you thank you thank you! Sounds like you understand completely! I'll be telling my shrink about Monday next time I see him. We'll see what he says...Just gonna take each day as it comes.

P.S. Thanks also for talking about freezing as a natural reaction. It makes me feel better to read that.