R.I.P. Marilyn Kay Lewis
Grandma, since I didn't get to say goodbye to you...and to tell you how much I love you... I guess this is my way of doing it? I hope, somehow you can see this. Tuesday is going to be so hard. You're going to look so beautiful in the outfit Cindy helped picked out, like you always looked. I can't believe I haven't talked to you in so long... I really wish I would have. Maybe we could have talked more about you coming here and visiting, and actually planned something out. That would have been...awesome. I remember the last time you were down here, and we actually connected. You became one of my favorite relatives and will remain one of the best friends I will EVER have. I still can't believe this is happening, I don't WANT this to be happening. It just needs to be a horrible dream that I'm going to wake up from...anytime now. Not having you is tearing us all apart, Grandma. And don't listen to what Grandpa is saying, you know he loves you more than life itself. This is just hitting us all so hard, we don't know how to react. We don't want to have to react. We want you back... We NEED you back. Morgan needs A LOT of great memories with you for when he grows up. I need to spend more time with you. We just all need you in our lives for them to be complete. Please, come back? I'll call you EVERY day to check on you... God dammit, we're not mad at you for leaving because I know if it was up to you, you wouldn't have picked for this to happen...but this is too hard to go through without you there to help us through it. I can't believe I'll never see you again, I will never speak to you again, I'll never get to hear your laugh, or get to see you smile, or go out to eat with you like we always used to, we'll never get to share another bag of those orange candies you loved so much, never get to listen to the stories about your life...nothing. I hope the last thing you thought about me wasn't negative, I don't want you to remember me like that... Grandma, I'll never forget you...and you'll always be in my heart. I miss you so much...it's unimaginable. I love you, I love you SO much.