(no subject)
I just feel kind of weird today. I've felt this way before.
I don't know how many times before, or how long ago it was that I first felt like this. It's a very indefinite feeling that goes beyond what any words could describe.
Except confusion. Because I confuse myself when I try to even speak of it. It's nothing and yet it is something at the same time.
The thing is, I have no idea whether I am happy or depressed as hell. I don't know if I hate my life or love it. I feel anxiously unsettled yet comfortable.
Today I really want to go back to elementary school. I was just thinking how much better Willow was than any other school in the whole world. Fall was a lot better too. Halloween could never be the same again as it was when I was little. I don't understand how dressing like a prostitute and spending half the night puking and blacking out ever had anything to do with trick or treating either.
So disturbing.
I don't know how many times before, or how long ago it was that I first felt like this. It's a very indefinite feeling that goes beyond what any words could describe.
Except confusion. Because I confuse myself when I try to even speak of it. It's nothing and yet it is something at the same time.
The thing is, I have no idea whether I am happy or depressed as hell. I don't know if I hate my life or love it. I feel anxiously unsettled yet comfortable.
Today I really want to go back to elementary school. I was just thinking how much better Willow was than any other school in the whole world. Fall was a lot better too. Halloween could never be the same again as it was when I was little. I don't understand how dressing like a prostitute and spending half the night puking and blacking out ever had anything to do with trick or treating either.
So disturbing.