(no subject)
alls i must say is that last night was AMAZINGG. As much as i feel im getting closer with a lot of other people, i feel like im becoming distant with other people. It sucks but then it doesnt because i use to see those people alll the time and now its more exciting to see or hang out with them because i dont see them as much. But it's sort of sad, and i dont know how to create a good balance. Anyway, I feel like i am hiding everything from people, well actually a lot of things i do hide. All my friends say oh you never tell me anything, and i feel like there is nothing to tell ever, maybe there is? I always feel like everything i could tell is not worth telling because no one really cares. That's a problem, i never really let things out, it sort of all bulids up inside and eventually it starts to come out, an bad things happen then. I need to learn to i guess share my feelings, but it's hard to tell people everything that goes on or what you feel, especially, if they have more mportant things going on in their own life. I guess i dont want to turn my problems into other people's problems. I know i have turned my problem into someone elses before but thats only happened a couple of times, i hope. I started this update in the morning and was feeling like so happy and now i am finishing it like 12 hours later and i feel like crap. I dont know, when i was cleaning the house for my mom, i just kept getting all these really bad things about everything that has been making me happy. Lately, everything has been going the way i wanted it to, sooner or later it's not going to do that. does that mean i won't be happy anymore? i dont know, A lot of people think im just this like a sad, boring girl who cant have fun, i am like that online most of the time, and in person sometimes i can go crazzzy and you would never know i could ever be like a serious person. It also depends on who i am with i guess.