Just some bitching...

[_sailorstar_]

I feel bad for not updating. I feel bad in general. I seem to be getting worse and not better at all. All these different meds, and no help. Its beyond frustrating. I want to talk to my specialist about it. Like maybe Ive been misdiagnosed. Yeah I wish. I wish she would say..oh yeah you dont have RA. You have something easily treatable or curable.

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[_sailorstar_]

I wish my insurance coverd "alternitive" stuff but it doesnt. Sometimes I wish I were in canada, just for the health care. I understand that your dad is probablly really excited about new treatments, even my nurse at my spevialist office was saying that about how there used to be no effective treatment. And Im sure there are people who only get minumal side effects and I envy them every day. Apparently (according to my specialist) because I have fibromyalgia, I have drug sensitivities, which means I get all the fun side effects. Im almost to the point where Im just going to let this disease do what its going to do to me and not do anything about it. Of course that is terrible to think, buts its hard to keep hoping that the next thing will work or that Ill even be able to tolerate it. I had to quit taking enbrel (the latest one) because it wasnt working and when I gave myself the shot I wouldnt be able to get out of bed for 2 days. And I had to do this twice a week. I have a 3 year old, and no one to help me, so I cant do it. I always wonder why cant I get some curable disease? Maybe someday there will be a cure for us, but that wont give me back all the time and things Ive lost to this disease. Im so sorry for sounding ungrateful, I really am grateful for your willingness to help me. You are a good person. :)

[_sailorstar_]

LOL Ive done that dance and boy Im sore in the morning!