Death of Me, yet?
Dear World of the Living,
If you're wondering why I'm not at school it's because I was mauled by a giraffe and after five hours of having test done on me at the hospital I chewed through some chords that were feeding into my arm, I found out later they were "important". So, I flat lined. But that's alright.
My lifeless body was put into the temporary morgue below the hospital where it was then stolen by a crazed lunatic. He took my corpse to the mansion of this mad scientist and sold it for 10 shillings, not noticing that shillings aren't very useful in New Jersey.
The mad scientist, who everyone in the manor affectionately refers to as Doc Henry, brought me back to life as some sort of Zombie like creature. The process itself actually tickles quite a bit. There's nothing like having an electrical serge sent through your body and some mysterious green liquid pumped into your veins.
Being dead isn't anything like I expected it to be. I'm not rotting or anything, my skin has turned even paler than it was though, if it could be any paler. But there's been no cravings for brains and human flesh. In fact, being dead has made me eat healthier. Just an hour ago, Doc Henry and I enjoyed a light salad and watched this old Beauty and the Beast VHS we found while looking though the boxes in the east sector of the lab.
But, to all my friends and family, don't worry. There will be a funeral service for me sometime next week. I won't be there of course. It will be closed casket and the coffin will be filled with pudding and rocks to give it weight. Everyone who attends will get a gift bag containing a copy of my obituary and plastic dinosaur figurines!
Well, I must be going. Doc Henry and I are going water skiing and then some of the evil robots in the lab want to have a fondue party and I never pass up the chance to dip food in other really hot melty food.
Good Bye Forever,
Kayla
P.S. Could someone feed my cat
If you're wondering why I'm not at school it's because I was mauled by a giraffe and after five hours of having test done on me at the hospital I chewed through some chords that were feeding into my arm, I found out later they were "important". So, I flat lined. But that's alright.
My lifeless body was put into the temporary morgue below the hospital where it was then stolen by a crazed lunatic. He took my corpse to the mansion of this mad scientist and sold it for 10 shillings, not noticing that shillings aren't very useful in New Jersey.
The mad scientist, who everyone in the manor affectionately refers to as Doc Henry, brought me back to life as some sort of Zombie like creature. The process itself actually tickles quite a bit. There's nothing like having an electrical serge sent through your body and some mysterious green liquid pumped into your veins.
Being dead isn't anything like I expected it to be. I'm not rotting or anything, my skin has turned even paler than it was though, if it could be any paler. But there's been no cravings for brains and human flesh. In fact, being dead has made me eat healthier. Just an hour ago, Doc Henry and I enjoyed a light salad and watched this old Beauty and the Beast VHS we found while looking though the boxes in the east sector of the lab.
But, to all my friends and family, don't worry. There will be a funeral service for me sometime next week. I won't be there of course. It will be closed casket and the coffin will be filled with pudding and rocks to give it weight. Everyone who attends will get a gift bag containing a copy of my obituary and plastic dinosaur figurines!
Well, I must be going. Doc Henry and I are going water skiing and then some of the evil robots in the lab want to have a fondue party and I never pass up the chance to dip food in other really hot melty food.
Good Bye Forever,
Kayla
P.S. Could someone feed my cat