Back for a little bitch post

[_rocknrollrebel]

Yeah I know I said I was done posting and mostly I am but I just kinda wanted to vent for a second or so. First off I did change positions at TMI so I am still working there and I will be getting awesome pay raises and my work is so much better. I am fucked up in the head. This is where we get all whining and self pitying. I miss my dad and little brother. I've been depressed since I got back from Texas since I miss them so much. My brother is going to die soon and I wont be there while he grows up for a short while. It fucks with my mind alot. I'm pretty lonely too. I know having a person to be with that cares about u is important but not the only thing to live for but I seem to have nothing but bad fucking luck having people in my life. I got alot of stuff floating around in my miscomplected head. I bet i'll be single till I die. I'll never have kids and never get married. I dont trust anyone. I got burned so bad when I was younger I dont want people to get close to me. I pull the worst out of someone so they dont like me and dont want to be with me. I am super defensive with that. I dont think anyone stands a chance with me. Wow this shit is pathetic. I got shitfaced last night. I drank so much I could barley walk. I fell over myself. It's just my way of handling things(which isnt really good at all.) I need to live in the mountains I think. Dont you hate liking someone so much and you can't do a thing about it? I know I do. That can make you very crazy. It's rough out there people. I need my friends just to bare with me while I'm going through all this dog shit.

Okay, what is it tonight?
Please just tell me what the hell is wrong!
Do you wanna eat?
Do you wanna sleep?
Do you wanna drown?
Just settle down, settle down, settle down!
I'll give you candy, give you diamonds, give you pills
give you anything you want--hundred-dollar bills
I'll even let you watch the shows you wanna see
just marry me marry me marry me!
I'm so sick of you tonight
You never stay awake when I get home
Is something wrong with me?
Is something wrong with you?
I really wish I knew wish I knew wish I knew!
I'll give you candy, give you diamonds, give you pills
I'll give you anything you want--hundred-dollar bills
I'll even let you watch the shows you wanna see
Because you marry me marry me marry me!
Marry me marry me marry me!
I was young, I learned a game
And love and happiness were the same
Now I'm older and I don't play--I found out the hardest way.
I got wasted she got mad
Called me names and she called her dad
He got crazy and I did too
Wondered what I did to you.
I gave you candy, gave you diamonds, gave you pills
Gave you anything you want--
Hundred-dollar bills!
I even let you hear the songs I want to sing
I'll give you anything anything anything
I'll give you anything anything anything
I'll give you anything anything anything
anything
anything
anything