sigh.
a year ago at this time i was at slu for chappie dance camp. wowwww. that was a fun time. i would give anything to go back to last summer. good luck to my quiggs on the dance contest. i have much faith in you!
hi i am rachel and i dont want to go to college. i am nervous as you-know-what.
wow i havent bored you all with my life in a long time.
thursday night was disney trivia night at gregs. fun for the whole family.
friday night i went to the mall shortly..to kristin hennessey's house for some mean hot dogs, and then off to see anchorman, which i fell alseep in . not that it was that bad..i was just really tired and miserable. but i must say it wasnt as good as i thought (well the parts i saw hah).
satrudaay we had work and it was realllllly raining bad so we decided to fake a eletrical outage so we could go home. well as soon as we were leaving it cleared up, but we left anyway. then i went to kristins house to play. we had a macaroni and cheese-mini ravioli-oreo smorgasbourg (how the hell do you spell that?) we watched the baby sitters club movie (BSC 4 LYFE) and napped the shit out of it. i went home and then we went and surprised the hell out of greg franklin for his birthday. it was quite fun. i got to meet the best kitten on earth, which made the entire thing even more amazing.
today i went and saw keiths play with mom,k hen, and sill. he is seymour in little shop of horrors in rivertown. it was really good. i cried, alot. (not because of the play though...other reason). then we went to cheescake bistro and i said yum yum this is good, because it was good. we chatted about stupid people and working in retail. then i went to church, where i cried even more. sigh. then i went to p rigs for game night, where we lost miserably, but hey, it was fun. kind of.
what the hell. why is life so hard sometimes. sometimes its going so amazing and everythign is going right. but then, bam...it seems it cant get any worse. yea yea i know everything happens for a reason, but thats so hard to believe in hard times. its so hard to keep your faith in God when it seems like He isnt there. i know He is, but i just feel lost. i try and try and try but i just am angry that my aunt laurie is gone. ijust want an answer. and why do bad things happen to such good people. i just dont get it. and on another note...sometimes i just feel like if one person....you know who i am talking about..decided he didnt want to be with me, then who does. or who ever will. obviosly something was wrong with me. fuck the sea and the other fish in it. the sea is stupid and only has seaweed and one other stupid jerk fish that doesnt even care about me anymore.
i feel like all of these hurts have changed me. i am not the same person i was two months ago, and i am definitly not the same since about two weeks ago. im not sure who really cares about me, but i feel like ive been distacnign myself from the people that seem to want to be there for me. im sorry. i just cant make myself be regular-happy-peppy-rachel. i dont even know who i am anymore.
i need a hug.
i am dreading the next week of work. i hate customers, especially when i am tired. which i will be.
okay.bye.
hi i am rachel and i dont want to go to college. i am nervous as you-know-what.
wow i havent bored you all with my life in a long time.
thursday night was disney trivia night at gregs. fun for the whole family.
friday night i went to the mall shortly..to kristin hennessey's house for some mean hot dogs, and then off to see anchorman, which i fell alseep in . not that it was that bad..i was just really tired and miserable. but i must say it wasnt as good as i thought (well the parts i saw hah).
satrudaay we had work and it was realllllly raining bad so we decided to fake a eletrical outage so we could go home. well as soon as we were leaving it cleared up, but we left anyway. then i went to kristins house to play. we had a macaroni and cheese-mini ravioli-oreo smorgasbourg (how the hell do you spell that?) we watched the baby sitters club movie (BSC 4 LYFE) and napped the shit out of it. i went home and then we went and surprised the hell out of greg franklin for his birthday. it was quite fun. i got to meet the best kitten on earth, which made the entire thing even more amazing.
today i went and saw keiths play with mom,k hen, and sill. he is seymour in little shop of horrors in rivertown. it was really good. i cried, alot. (not because of the play though...other reason). then we went to cheescake bistro and i said yum yum this is good, because it was good. we chatted about stupid people and working in retail. then i went to church, where i cried even more. sigh. then i went to p rigs for game night, where we lost miserably, but hey, it was fun. kind of.
what the hell. why is life so hard sometimes. sometimes its going so amazing and everythign is going right. but then, bam...it seems it cant get any worse. yea yea i know everything happens for a reason, but thats so hard to believe in hard times. its so hard to keep your faith in God when it seems like He isnt there. i know He is, but i just feel lost. i try and try and try but i just am angry that my aunt laurie is gone. ijust want an answer. and why do bad things happen to such good people. i just dont get it. and on another note...sometimes i just feel like if one person....you know who i am talking about..decided he didnt want to be with me, then who does. or who ever will. obviosly something was wrong with me. fuck the sea and the other fish in it. the sea is stupid and only has seaweed and one other stupid jerk fish that doesnt even care about me anymore.
i feel like all of these hurts have changed me. i am not the same person i was two months ago, and i am definitly not the same since about two weeks ago. im not sure who really cares about me, but i feel like ive been distacnign myself from the people that seem to want to be there for me. im sorry. i just cant make myself be regular-happy-peppy-rachel. i dont even know who i am anymore.
i need a hug.
i am dreading the next week of work. i hate customers, especially when i am tired. which i will be.
okay.bye.