[AU CONTEST] [FIC]My Vice. ReitaxRuki. Oneshot
Title: My Vice
Chapter: Oneshot
Author: hikumurakami
Pairing: ReitaxRuki
Genre: AU…angst, romance? General (A total dummy with this…)
Rating: PG…Maybe PG-13 for slight language…
Warning: My bad english… Ruki being emo XDU?
Summary: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves"
The smoke of my cigarette made curls with the air while disappearing in front of me. It is a real vice, this thing. I wouldn’t leave it even if I could.
This isn’t my only vice. No, a guy like me, is like a vice breeder. And it's one vice, the greatest of them all, that now had me sitting there, at the edge of a building, looking to the horizon, thinking on the ‘what if’s, and ‘used to be’s.
I have nothing more left.
I close my eyes while giving one more smoke to my cigarette, and letting my breath out to the heavens. It’d be cool, really…being able to fly out of this rotten city, the place where I gained and lost so much… the place where I met him.
Yes, ladies and gentleman! The reason why I’m here about to fell from a building; pitying myself, half naked, with nothing but a box of cigarettes…is a man. His name is… No, wait. He never actually told me his name. ‘Cause Reita cannot be considered a name at all.
Not that I’m blaming the guy for becoming such a vice to me. It all began with plain business. It was my work, to be a host for the clients of this darned luxurious hotel on the center of the inferno called a ‘metropolis’. All my life had been filling others vices, filling my own. Money, sex… I had a good life, shelter, food. Even friends, I think so… What else could I ever need? Why the fuck I needed more??
He had been the light of my world… He had made me believe I could have another life, that I was more, better than I was then… He made me believe I was loved. A person who was destined to never feel that kind of feeling…
I truly believed it… I heard this man say those tender words so many times while we were entwined at night, caressing each other, making promises… Now I wonder, how many of those words he actually meant? Why it was only me the one who were really honest? When it should have been the other way around! I was supposed to be the one who couldn’t be used, hurt! I was the one who could manipulate all those perverted men that only were looking for a night of good sex, away from unwanted wife or the hell know what! Not me! NOT ME!
I gave everything I was and had. Everything. For him.
Why he lied to me…?
Why, Rei…?
'cause…
Oh, holy fuck…
…I love you… can’t you see?
The worst part is…that you do. You did see that I loved you so much… And you, fucking bastard, got scared or couldn’t stand the pressure of the ones behind you…and even got to say those hurting words to me, that destroyed me from within, and made me knew a pain I never thought I could feel… and everything you said to me, everything that you promised, got wasted. Like if they meant anything to you…like I never meant anything to you… Like you never loved me.
But I still love you, you know? I still love you…
And love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves…
Or so I have read…heh…
Preserves… I could have given everything to preserve this… But…
So… I stand now over the edge of this building, feeling a peace I long ago thought lost, the wind caressing my cheeks, my hair, tenderly, like trying to comfort me.
Is it worth, to keep suffering about you…? Is it fair for me and you, all this? Did we ever love each other truly? I’d like to think so… At least that would mean this wasn’t totally a waste of time…
I hear noises down, on the street. This is not such a high hotel, so I can see kinda well from here… And there you are, you weird looks as always, the flawless I wish I could have… And that pretty girl, taking your hand, kissing your lips… You making her promises that used to be mine…
And I can’t help to wonder, once again…
Are you worth it, my dearest?
I look at you, while walking to the limousine waiting for you both. And as if some kind of instinct dictated, you stop. Turn. And look up. Right into my eyes. Just like the first time…
And the smile cannot help to show in my lips.
And the tears stubbornly leaving my eyes.
And while your expression turns into real panic at the sight of me there, I extend my arms to each side. Showing you myself. All that I am. All that wasn’t enough for you. All that I will not be anymore.
‘Cause you are not worth it, my dearest.
And I let my vice to fall.
“RUKI!!!”
*+*+*+*+*+*
CHAN CHAN CHAN!!
o.o Yep, that last one was Reita screaming XDUU He got his little dialogue in here, adding the tragedy to the last part!
Ok!! o.o I hope it wasn’t boring for you guys XDU I actually enjoyed writing it. In fact, this was supposed to be a multichapter fic! (I have two of them already done XD) But I realized that I wouldn’t be able to finish it on time for the contest, so! Here is the oneshot version!
^^ Thank you SO much for reading! I was so nervous to enter this contest XDU
And sorry again for my English. This is the first time I write a fic on this language, so I hope I didn’t mess up that much…
Oh, and I would love to hear your comments! Or read, actually XPU
This was so much fun, gotta say again!
Thanks to innerchancefor this amazing contest!
P.D.: Oh, and this is the image I had to base this on: Here =)
I really liked it! ♥
Chapter: Oneshot
Author: hikumurakami
Pairing: ReitaxRuki
Genre: AU…angst, romance? General (A total dummy with this…)
Rating: PG…Maybe PG-13 for slight language…
Warning: My bad english… Ruki being emo XDU?
Summary: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves"
The smoke of my cigarette made curls with the air while disappearing in front of me. It is a real vice, this thing. I wouldn’t leave it even if I could.
This isn’t my only vice. No, a guy like me, is like a vice breeder. And it's one vice, the greatest of them all, that now had me sitting there, at the edge of a building, looking to the horizon, thinking on the ‘what if’s, and ‘used to be’s.
I have nothing more left.
I close my eyes while giving one more smoke to my cigarette, and letting my breath out to the heavens. It’d be cool, really…being able to fly out of this rotten city, the place where I gained and lost so much… the place where I met him.
Yes, ladies and gentleman! The reason why I’m here about to fell from a building; pitying myself, half naked, with nothing but a box of cigarettes…is a man. His name is… No, wait. He never actually told me his name. ‘Cause Reita cannot be considered a name at all.
Not that I’m blaming the guy for becoming such a vice to me. It all began with plain business. It was my work, to be a host for the clients of this darned luxurious hotel on the center of the inferno called a ‘metropolis’. All my life had been filling others vices, filling my own. Money, sex… I had a good life, shelter, food. Even friends, I think so… What else could I ever need? Why the fuck I needed more??
He had been the light of my world… He had made me believe I could have another life, that I was more, better than I was then… He made me believe I was loved. A person who was destined to never feel that kind of feeling…
I truly believed it… I heard this man say those tender words so many times while we were entwined at night, caressing each other, making promises… Now I wonder, how many of those words he actually meant? Why it was only me the one who were really honest? When it should have been the other way around! I was supposed to be the one who couldn’t be used, hurt! I was the one who could manipulate all those perverted men that only were looking for a night of good sex, away from unwanted wife or the hell know what! Not me! NOT ME!
I gave everything I was and had. Everything. For him.
Why he lied to me…?
Why, Rei…?
'cause…
Oh, holy fuck…
…I love you… can’t you see?
The worst part is…that you do. You did see that I loved you so much… And you, fucking bastard, got scared or couldn’t stand the pressure of the ones behind you…and even got to say those hurting words to me, that destroyed me from within, and made me knew a pain I never thought I could feel… and everything you said to me, everything that you promised, got wasted. Like if they meant anything to you…like I never meant anything to you… Like you never loved me.
But I still love you, you know? I still love you…
And love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves…
Or so I have read…heh…
Preserves… I could have given everything to preserve this… But…
So… I stand now over the edge of this building, feeling a peace I long ago thought lost, the wind caressing my cheeks, my hair, tenderly, like trying to comfort me.
Is it worth, to keep suffering about you…? Is it fair for me and you, all this? Did we ever love each other truly? I’d like to think so… At least that would mean this wasn’t totally a waste of time…
I hear noises down, on the street. This is not such a high hotel, so I can see kinda well from here… And there you are, you weird looks as always, the flawless I wish I could have… And that pretty girl, taking your hand, kissing your lips… You making her promises that used to be mine…
And I can’t help to wonder, once again…
Are you worth it, my dearest?
I look at you, while walking to the limousine waiting for you both. And as if some kind of instinct dictated, you stop. Turn. And look up. Right into my eyes. Just like the first time…
And the smile cannot help to show in my lips.
And the tears stubbornly leaving my eyes.
And while your expression turns into real panic at the sight of me there, I extend my arms to each side. Showing you myself. All that I am. All that wasn’t enough for you. All that I will not be anymore.
‘Cause you are not worth it, my dearest.
And I let my vice to fall.
“RUKI!!!”
*+*+*+*+*+*
CHAN CHAN CHAN!!
o.o Yep, that last one was Reita screaming XDUU He got his little dialogue in here, adding the tragedy to the last part!
Ok!! o.o I hope it wasn’t boring for you guys XDU I actually enjoyed writing it. In fact, this was supposed to be a multichapter fic! (I have two of them already done XD) But I realized that I wouldn’t be able to finish it on time for the contest, so! Here is the oneshot version!
^^ Thank you SO much for reading! I was so nervous to enter this contest XDU
And sorry again for my English. This is the first time I write a fic on this language, so I hope I didn’t mess up that much…
Oh, and I would love to hear your comments! Or read, actually XPU
This was so much fun, gotta say again!
Thanks to innerchancefor this amazing contest!
P.D.: Oh, and this is the image I had to base this on: Here =)
I really liked it! ♥