where has the time gone?
Seems like only yesterday I was turning 18 and busting my ass to make sure that I was going to pass my senior year and get senior exemptions...
It's now 2007...and I will be turning 19 in well, 19 days....and instead of studying my butt off for exams, i'll soon be starting my second semester in college.
It's weird thinking that I'm so much more mature now. I feel almost different. Maybe it's because it's 1:15 in the morning, but who knows? I'm an adult....not officially on my own yet, but almost there. Paying my own bills, working all the time...and going to school. It's just weird....
I passed all my classes with a C or better. My GPA is 3.125 so I'm not doing too bad.
Throughout the last year, I've come to realize that high school never really leaves you. The drama is still everywhere. At work and school...church. It's one of those never ending things. I tried so hard to stay out of it, yet everytime I get brought back into it. I hate it. I just wish people would grow up. Honestly.....who cares about who's dating who and what amy did with johnny last night? It's not going to matter in the long run. It really gets you nowhere in the big world. People just talk about how much of a brown-noser and gossiper you are. It never ceases to amaze me how people get so wrapped up in such petty things. There are some people who base their lives on it....and for what? You don't make people feel better by talking behind their backs....you can't make friends when you are constantly being a backstabber....it just all seems so....pointless....worthless. Yet, some people find it worth their time to ruin other people's lives...telling them how they should live it and what they should do. Blackmailing them. All for personal gain. Is this what society has brought us down to? If that's the case, then something needs to be changed. And it all starts with those who are willing to admit that this is wrong....and do something about it. I can't do it on my own....and personally I wouldn't know where to start because it's one of those things that seem nearly impossible to change because....no one is willing to accept change. Everyone is afraid of it....at some point or another. Even though we all have to go through it, we fear it. Why? Wouldn't change be a good thing? If you were changing for the better, why fear it? Is it the fear of the unknown? Of the obstacles that we know we must face in order to achieve the change we want? Or is it knowing that we will lose something from changing?
I'm ready for change....I'm ready to change the world. Make a difference. But where do I go....what do I do to get people to listen and want to change with me? How do I get people to see the way I see so they will understand?
This ended up being much longer than I wanted, but the thought kept going. I must get to bed. Good night...and sweet dreams.