hello, i've waited here for you everlong

[_pinkmoon9]

last night i couldn't go to sleep because i was thinking about so many things. anyway it was one of those things where i was listening to music n my little ipod for like two hours and staring at a wall(occasionally out the window) and idk i had several epiphanies which is quite an accomplishment. i realized that i already missed some of my friends and they haven't left yet and that it will be six months until i see most of them. and even though i have great friends at college there are some here that will never be replaced. and then i was thinking:but one day they might be replaced...right? i mean they can't be my best friends forever, one day some kid named alexander...no i don't like that name enough..umm some kid named austin could be my best friend and then where will the other people be? will they just fade into 'my high school years' closed in a vault? I don't know and the not knowing sucks so much so for now my heart hurts. i sleep a lot so i don't have to think about some stuff but i'm so damn rested that i can't sleep anymore. some things are so great when you get home and others you just dread. when will the bad stuff outweigh the good? can that happen? it's one thing to miss home, and another to fear it. oh jeez too much in the morning, i need to stop my rambling.

..and if you want me you better speak up, i won't wait so you better move fast...