Annual Birthday Post . . .
(or What I've Learn in Three Score years plus six)
Society has some pretty strong opinions on how you should live your life. Society doesn't know you. In addition, society doesn't give a damn about you. Ignore society and make your own choices. Society will tell you that you're wrong. Fuck those guys.
ME) I decided I didn't want to have children. I got a vasectomy when I was 30yo.
SOCIETY) "You'll change your mind when you're older." "A life without children is incomplete." "Who will take care of you when you are old?"
CONCLUSION) This was all before the child-free movement. I've never regretted to not having children.
ME) I intentionally mostly estranged myself from my family in my late 20s.
SOCIETY) "In the end, family are the only ones you can count on to be there for you." "You'll end up alone."
CONCLUSION) My family is a huge black hole of anger, resentment, and need. Abusive. Toxic.
ME) I refused to buy property during the housing bubble. I waited until the economy crashed and the housing bubble deflated.
SOCIETY) "Home prices are only ever going to go up." "Everybody needs a place to live." "You are missing out."
CONCLUSION) I love my house. I have a mortgage in the low six figures rather than in the mid to high six figures.
ME) I left my job and took the summer off every other year for 7 summers between 2003 to 2023.
SOCIETY) "You could run out of money." "What if you can't find a job in the fall?" "Employers don't like gaps in a resume."
CONCLUSION) Time off is rejuvenating. Not having the relentless demands of a job allows you to be you.
ME) I went into therapy for several years in the early 90s. That wasn't a very popular decision at the time.
SOCIETY) "A real man can solve his own problems." "What do they know that you cannot figure out for yourself?" "That's just showing weakness."
CONCLUSION) I've never met anyone that could not benefit from a couple of years of therapy.
ME) I have been a Techie for my whole career. I choose not to go into management. It didn't interest or excite me.
SOCIETY) "You need to climb the corporate ladder to gain visibility." "You just can't earn much of a salary that way." "You will get very tired of tech after so many years."
CONCLUSION) The advance of Tech is relentless. I changes year to year. I find that exhilarating, exciting and engaging. Acquiring and maintaining a skill set that is in demand is what will keep you working, not company [nonexistent] loyalty.
ME) I don't want to live as long as I possibly can. I am aiming to die in my early to mid 70s.
SOCIETY) "That's crazy, everybody wants to live as long as possible." "You'll change your mind when you get older." "Think of what you'll miss."
CONCLUSION) The American medical community has made a mistake in deciding how to care for our elderly. They have decided that their only responsibility is to keep each person alive as long as possible. This ignores the issues of independence, quality of life and personal choice. Due to this, a majority of our elderly end up in care facilities with no agency as to their life choices. I don't intend to let this happen to me. I plan to die first.