(no subject)
Grandma passed away. Too see a long rant on that, visit www.konekonyannyan.deviantart.com and go back one journal.
I now attend a school here in CHurchville. And we're lying, saying that I live with my step mom when I'm actually living with my granny about an hour away.
Which is hell.
My granny has no internet.
Did I mention that everyone at my school is rich, bratty, and all smoke pot?
Oh yeah. I soooo fit in.
So due to the HUGE amount of uncomfortable-ness in my new environment, I havent been able to act like myself. I've been sulking around being depressed about the living environment I'm in (The house is a one flour, really, really small 1 bedroom house with beds shoved into other rooms to make it looks bigger. AND, the room I sleep in was actually added onto the house. And its right by a airport so at 3 or earlier every morning I'm woken to the sound of the plane landing right next door. The walls are thin like paper, I can hear with the neighbor walks on the leaves in his lawn..etc etc. ) and because of my negative body language, I guess no one wants to talk to me. I feel stupid and slow except for in my French class, but only because I'm in French 1 again. (Because I wasnt sure where, level wise, French 2 was..) Andy (Step brother) is constently making fun of me and my lack of friends or bravery to talk to anyone (He means well, his jokes are just really starting to hurt lately. ) AND MY ####### BRAT-ASS STEP SISTER GETS EVERY ####### THING SHE'LL EVER NEED OR WANT, AND IS STILL A ####### BITCH.
..I'll reflect on her later.
More about school.
I have managed to become aquantences(sp?) of a few people, and close to friends with two of them. =_= Which isnt bad.
The aquantences in my gym class let me stand or sit in their group (How nice of them..) but wont talk to me. Just ignore me and leave me out of the conversation.
My step-siblings all go to the school. I barely talk to Andy or Phillip, and Maria is a cheerleader and therefore popular and pretty and a total bitch. She has *Tried* to be nice, but with alot of failure. She walks me into the school and lets me tag along like her shadow, while she sees and hugs and talks to all 51465456452156475154515.3 of her friends. Which makes me feel just GREAT about having, how many? Oh, yeah, NONE.
..x.x I miss all my old friends. I miss my old life. I miss having my own room with all my studd and getting to wear more than 3 ourfits and seeing my friends and being late to class and having a simple schedual with the same lunch period and having friends to sit and talk with during lunch and I miss having attention, grandma, just..Everything. x.x
And if I ever say I'm doing fine, I'm lying. Life sucks right now, And while it may not be as bad as others, I'm ####### complaining. Dont wanna hear it stop reading cause it isnt stopping here.
I have to get up at 4:00 every morning so I can get ready by 4:40-5:00 so we can leave and take the hour trip to my step-mom's house so my dad can drive an hour back to his job by 6:00 or so, and then I wait around until a little after seven to get on the bus and sit in silence while listening to Miyavi because its the only CD and form of relief from this bullshit new life that I *have* to get used to, and theres still bullshit with my mom, who just wants me to live with her so she can get the child support money and--GOD! x__x
Maria, the spoiled rotten bratty little bitch ass cheerleader, whom we had to pick up from cheerleading practice tonight...Anyways, we all went to the Wawa, and her mom asked why and she says
"I need a soda, a soda for tomarrow, some gum, something to eat.."
her mom pauses, then says "theres ten bucks in my wallet"
She obnoctiously(sp?) replies,
"*only* ten dollars?! What if I go over the budget?!"
...=.= What a ####### brat.
Anyways, her mom replies, "Then you just cant go over the budget. "
She runs in and I tell her mom what a brat she is and that she spoils her. Maria comes back and hops in the car and her mom asks "Did you go over the budget?"
She replies
"No. I'm keeping the change"
I swear..I hate her sometimes.
I think she would just die if her mom wasnt a ####### nurse.
Ms. Phill (Maria, Phil's, and Andy's mom) is having issues with my dad. Shes being incredibly selfish. She wont get back with him dispite the fact she putting Dad and her children (Jack and Madison) though childhood trauma, and because why? He plays band on the weekend.
He get money for it, and its something he loves to do! And she says she dosent get enough time with him on the weekends. And he replies
"Well I could say the same to you, you work every third weekend. But I would never ask you to stop being a nurse, cause i know you love helping children and saving lives. I know that if you couldnt save a dying child, if you couldnt fly in that helicopter to save a kid, that you just couldnt live. I know how much it means to you, and thats why I, dispite the fact it takes away from the family time and the time you spend with me, I would NEVER ask you to stop. "
..I almost cried. My dad is such a nice person. And yes, Ms. Phill did tell him to quit the band.
*Long, heavy sign* And thats the end of my rant.
I now attend a school here in CHurchville. And we're lying, saying that I live with my step mom when I'm actually living with my granny about an hour away.
Which is hell.
My granny has no internet.
Did I mention that everyone at my school is rich, bratty, and all smoke pot?
Oh yeah. I soooo fit in.
So due to the HUGE amount of uncomfortable-ness in my new environment, I havent been able to act like myself. I've been sulking around being depressed about the living environment I'm in (The house is a one flour, really, really small 1 bedroom house with beds shoved into other rooms to make it looks bigger. AND, the room I sleep in was actually added onto the house. And its right by a airport so at 3 or earlier every morning I'm woken to the sound of the plane landing right next door. The walls are thin like paper, I can hear with the neighbor walks on the leaves in his lawn..etc etc. ) and because of my negative body language, I guess no one wants to talk to me. I feel stupid and slow except for in my French class, but only because I'm in French 1 again. (Because I wasnt sure where, level wise, French 2 was..) Andy (Step brother) is constently making fun of me and my lack of friends or bravery to talk to anyone (He means well, his jokes are just really starting to hurt lately. ) AND MY ####### BRAT-ASS STEP SISTER GETS EVERY ####### THING SHE'LL EVER NEED OR WANT, AND IS STILL A ####### BITCH.
..I'll reflect on her later.
More about school.
I have managed to become aquantences(sp?) of a few people, and close to friends with two of them. =_= Which isnt bad.
The aquantences in my gym class let me stand or sit in their group (How nice of them..) but wont talk to me. Just ignore me and leave me out of the conversation.
My step-siblings all go to the school. I barely talk to Andy or Phillip, and Maria is a cheerleader and therefore popular and pretty and a total bitch. She has *Tried* to be nice, but with alot of failure. She walks me into the school and lets me tag along like her shadow, while she sees and hugs and talks to all 51465456452156475154515.3 of her friends. Which makes me feel just GREAT about having, how many? Oh, yeah, NONE.
..x.x I miss all my old friends. I miss my old life. I miss having my own room with all my studd and getting to wear more than 3 ourfits and seeing my friends and being late to class and having a simple schedual with the same lunch period and having friends to sit and talk with during lunch and I miss having attention, grandma, just..Everything. x.x
And if I ever say I'm doing fine, I'm lying. Life sucks right now, And while it may not be as bad as others, I'm ####### complaining. Dont wanna hear it stop reading cause it isnt stopping here.
I have to get up at 4:00 every morning so I can get ready by 4:40-5:00 so we can leave and take the hour trip to my step-mom's house so my dad can drive an hour back to his job by 6:00 or so, and then I wait around until a little after seven to get on the bus and sit in silence while listening to Miyavi because its the only CD and form of relief from this bullshit new life that I *have* to get used to, and theres still bullshit with my mom, who just wants me to live with her so she can get the child support money and--GOD! x__x
Maria, the spoiled rotten bratty little bitch ass cheerleader, whom we had to pick up from cheerleading practice tonight...Anyways, we all went to the Wawa, and her mom asked why and she says
"I need a soda, a soda for tomarrow, some gum, something to eat.."
her mom pauses, then says "theres ten bucks in my wallet"
She obnoctiously(sp?) replies,
"*only* ten dollars?! What if I go over the budget?!"
...=.= What a ####### brat.
Anyways, her mom replies, "Then you just cant go over the budget. "
She runs in and I tell her mom what a brat she is and that she spoils her. Maria comes back and hops in the car and her mom asks "Did you go over the budget?"
She replies
"No. I'm keeping the change"
I swear..I hate her sometimes.
I think she would just die if her mom wasnt a ####### nurse.
Ms. Phill (Maria, Phil's, and Andy's mom) is having issues with my dad. Shes being incredibly selfish. She wont get back with him dispite the fact she putting Dad and her children (Jack and Madison) though childhood trauma, and because why? He plays band on the weekend.
He get money for it, and its something he loves to do! And she says she dosent get enough time with him on the weekends. And he replies
"Well I could say the same to you, you work every third weekend. But I would never ask you to stop being a nurse, cause i know you love helping children and saving lives. I know that if you couldnt save a dying child, if you couldnt fly in that helicopter to save a kid, that you just couldnt live. I know how much it means to you, and thats why I, dispite the fact it takes away from the family time and the time you spend with me, I would NEVER ask you to stop. "
..I almost cried. My dad is such a nice person. And yes, Ms. Phill did tell him to quit the band.
*Long, heavy sign* And thats the end of my rant.