the music (6/?)
- Title: The Music (6/?)
- Author: _ohholyfoolsx
- Pairing: Mikey and Frankie
- Rating: R
- Summary: He walked into the music store and started browsing the CDs. Every Friday Mikey saw him and never knew his name, only the way he moved, the way he dressed, the 4 layers of shirts, all thread-bare, and the music he liked. It was always about the music.
- POV: Third Person.
- Authors Note: Written whilst listening to "A perfect Sonnet" by Bright Eyes.
- Disclaimer: AU. Completely and utterly untrue.
one, two, three, four, five
William sat down and sighed, shaking his head slowly. This had been the only chance he had to try to re-introduce Gerard into Mikey life and he failed. Frank came and took a seat beside him, still curious as to what exactly was going on. He knew Mikey had a past, everyone did, but maybe this would give some insight as to why Mikey was so obsessed with music and why he was the way he was.
"What's going on?" Frank asked innocently, hoping he'd receive the answer he intended. He wanted to be there for Mikey, but without knowing what the kid was going through, it made things difficult.
William cocked an eye brow. "You sure you want to know?" it seemed like such and innocent question at the time.
For the next hour and a half William explained to Frank the madness behind the truly insane.***
*
Mikey had been 12, his brother 14 when everything really started happening. They were so young and turned out to be so impressionable. It was to be expected; the family they lived in, the location, the people there. Belleville held some of Jersey's finest, but I don't mean Scholars. Belleville had more pushers, dealers, growers, cultivators, and bootleggers just looking for the next target. Just looking for the next life to ruin.
By this time Gerard had fallen in with Adam, one of the worst. He grew and dealt, something you rarely find in a person. Adam, the scuzzy kid that never washed his hair, that always had what you were looking for, who dealt out of his house, his shed, the street corner, the school and the diner. The diner was the place to be. If you weren't at the diner, you weren't anybody. The kids there died for attention. Gerard went there everyday, spending his allowance on booze and not drugs; he maintained that he didn't want to be into the drug scene so early. He was so smart; it all seemed like such a waste the night he came home only to find his brother and hospitalize him.
Mikey was 14 and proud of it. Unlike his 16 year old brother, he'd never touched drugs, never drank anything but Kool-aid, spent his money on books and art supplies instead of liquor and pot. He stayed hom Friday nights and read a new book instead of going out and rolling joints like everyone else he knew. He went against the norm, did the opposite of what was classified as cool and loved it. He wasn't out freezing his ass off every night to score some acid or meet a new dealer. It wasn't who he was.
That night was the third night his parents had gone out, leaving them a note saying "we'll be back by 12, watch out for each other, I love you boys!" It was the third night Gerard had come home drunk, slamming doors and pounding on Mikey's room door as he lay in his bed, blankets over his head, praying. Tonight Mikey had wanted to play guitar next to the living room fire, he wanted to be warm while he played, wanted to feel the heat on his fingers while he wrote a new song.
He didn't hear Gerard slam the door closed as he entered. He didn't hear Gerard walk into the living room. He only hear Gerard scream his name. His fingers slipped; he broke the string.
Before him Gerard stood, hair slick with rain, tequila bottle in one hand, car keys in the other. He was grinning manically. "Mikey, my brother," he slurred. Mikey put the guitar on the ground and backed up. If Gerard was going to break something, don't let it be the guitar, it's all I have. "Come for a ride with me!" he grinned.
Mikey kept backing away. "No...you're...you're drunk!" he said loudly, knowing it was a mistake immediately. Gerard angrily took a step forward, leaning over him dangerously.
"So?" Gerard spat, throwing the bottle away. "I have friends, at least!"
Mikey, always so quick witted, but known for saying the wrong things at the wrong time. "Yeah, and look where you are now, you fuck up."
He didn't even scream as Gerard's heavy boot and foot came down on his leg with a sickening crack. The whole time Gerard was smiling. If he even saw the bone shard poking out of Mikey's leg he gave no sign. As Mikey regained his feeling, a deafening sound tore from his throat and Gerard's foot came down his is knee cap, ultimately breaking it into pieces.
Gerard didn't see the hatred in Mikey's eyes. He didn't see the love lost. He didn't watch Mikey pass out on the way to the hospital in Quinn's car. He wasn't there when Mikey, only 14, was crying on his parents shoulders, begging them to let him stay at Grannie's, at William's, "but only until I get better! Please Mom!" His parents said no and brough him home, back to Gerard. He felt no remorse. He still didn't feel it when he put his little brother back in the hospital when he was 15. The exact day he turned 15.
Mikey was in unconscious on the hospital because of Gerard. He'd taken a his fist and had beaten Mikey unconscious, calling his parents and frankly telling them what he'd done. The doctors told his parents it looked like he'd been beaten with something hard. His parents told the doctor he'd fallen out of a tree. Such a clumsy boy.
Gerard was slowly getting worse. He'd gotten into acid, LSD, PCP and everything under the sun. He'd start lashing out at William, his only non-druggie friend. Eventually Mikey would take Gerard's abuse when William was with him just so the other man didn't have to ever go through what Mikey did. Compassion only got him more pain when Gerard saw what he could get away with.
A month after his 17th birthday, Mikey came out to his parents that he was gay. They'd been shockingly supportive and had guessed when Mikey and William insisted on sharing their bedroom in the basement together without interruption. They laughed and talked as though times had never been better. Gerard wasn't home, Mikey didn't have any broken limbs and it seemed as though everything was right in the world. With a final hug goodnight Mikey retreated to his room in the basement and his parents to the attic to watch television.
Mikey didn't hear Gerard come in, but he had his bags packed. He didn't know Gerard was high on meth and not thinking correctly, but he heard his Fender being picked up in the corner of the room. He turned around and stood up. Gerard had heard Mikey's secret at the diner, he gotten laughed at, he'd been called a fag enough times to grow a deep rooted hatred for his brother. Mikey tried to ready himself. It wasn't enough. Gerard swung the guitar.
The sound was almost so silent his parents didn't hear it the first time. Mikey hit the floor, his ribs a wreck and his breathing erratic.
"Fucking fag." Gerard brought the guitar down on his brother once more before smashing it to bits on the wall and leaving the house. An hour later Mikey was found in the basement and Gerard was gone from the house. A week later Mikey came to get his stuff while Gerard was at the diner. The next day he and William moved to New York.
He vowed never to return to Belleville until Gerard was buried deep in the ground, as wounded as he himself had been time and time again.
*
Frank sat back, exhaling deeply, blinking a few times as though that might help him digest all the information he'd just taken in. Mikey's love for music; it had helped him escape Gerard when he was younger, it had been his anti-drug, it had saved him from Adam and the gang. Mikey's limp when he'd came into work that day; he'd fallen in the park, but his leg must not have healed all the way from his childhood injury. He'd been upset and Bert's drunkenness, worried and scared of what might happen to him if he got caught up in it again. So much now explained.
William stood up. "A month or so after that Adam was arrested and Gerard put himself into rehab. He finally understood what had happened, why he was so messed up over everything." William sighed. "A while ago when I was in to see him, he'd just tried to kill himself. He can't deal with what happened. He can't handle each day knowing Mikey hated him. His own brother."
Frank opened his mouth to reply, but heard Mikey behind him instead. "Too bad he didn't succeed." he said menacingly, tears flowing down his face freely. As he started to turn, Frank reacted.
He took hold of Mikey and pulled him into his arms, and the boy collapsed into silent sobs, clutching Frank as though it was the only thing he had in this life. William decided to leave, mouthing to Frank to take him back to Frank's while William cleaned the apartment. Frank nodded as William opened the door and left the Cafe, looking over his shoulder at Mikey in sympathy. He had been best friends with Gerard too, so he felt some of the emptiness Mikey felt.
"Mikey, sweetie," Frank whispered, bringing Mikey's face up to meet his eyes. "You look like you haven't slept in days." Mikey nodded and snuggled in closer to Frank's heart. "I'm going to take you to my place, make you The Iero Special and we're going to talk this out."
Mikey's head shot up. "But I--"
Frank stifled Mikey with a swift kiss, pulling his frail and weakened body up with his own stronger one. "Don't argue with me."
Frank didn't hear the Mikey's small and exhausted voice whisper as they left.
"I think I love you."
A/N: ***reference to "A Scientific Romance" by Ronald Wright.