Sometimes, the one who broke your heart...is the only one who knows where the pieces go.
I think there's a part of everyone that was once present, that was lost over time, never gained back, and now is greatly missed. For me, it's my ability to smile with such great happiness. I don't know what it is for a lot of other people; but I know it's there, somewhere in them. Something about that one thing not being a part of you anymore ( Read more... )
i've gone through all of these things in my life, to tell you the truth. i have sat there and cried myself to sleep for months straight, because it made me feel better about myself. i told myself that i could not cry in front of people, so i held that promise and at night, when i was the only one awake at my house, i would sit there and cry. my friends knew that something was going on with me and they didn't bother to ask. i had such an attitude about everything that came my way. i was a bitch to anyone who got in my way or even tried to help me. i jsut wanted to be on my own.
then i met bryan, and you say that you don't need the opposite sex to be happy, but i did. every night i would sit up talking to bryan about all my problems and he would tell me his. i always had those feelings, where you knew that if you just waited for a little bit we could be together. i waited and waited and nothing happened. but my relationship with him was so much different than any other. he was my best friend, but more. i could tell him so many things that i couldn't tell anyone else. he always knew when something was wrong and he looked out for me. none of my girl friends did that for me. bryan was different. it was almost as if he loved me .. because he was just there. yeah, we got into our little arguments every once in a while, but they just brought us closer. he's the one who got me to stop crying every night, he showed me the good things in life, and how to get through. he has been through so much shit, and through it all, he has still stayed true to me. he taught me what a best friend is. he's the only person i know that could ever do that.
and then htere was joey. i knew from the minute we started talking last summer that i was in love with him. and not the first grade kinda love, but true love. i still get butterflies when i see or talk to him. i was at a friends house last night and joey called me .. and her exact words were "i love how, right when you start talking to joey, you get this huge smile on your face. i've never seen you like that before". and to tell you the truth, i've never seen myself so happy in my life, either. joey actually wants to be there for me. at times, i am the biggest bitch to him, but he doesn't care, cause he knows that i love him. and i love him for one reason ; because he sticks by my side through all of my shit and no matter what i know that he'll always be there.
joey and bryan were the two things that made me truly happy. idk how i could ever be so happy right now if i didn't have the two of them there for me. yeah, i get sad every once in a while, but all that i have to do is call one of them and my frown is turned upsidedown.
basically, i'm not gonna tell you what to do with your life, but just know this: you may not think that you need a guy in your life, but you really do. get close with a guy. guys are so much different than girls, and they're sometimes alot more sensitive than some girls. they will be there for you when your closest friends turn their backs on you, that's a promise. go tlak ot bryan some more, he's a great best friend. yeah, he can be an asshole, but all of his frinds are worth so much more to him than you think. give him another chance, don't let him fly free.
I'm always here to talk if you need it, even if i am a total bitch sometimes ♥
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment