Needs.
Wiki says: A need is something that is necessary for organisms to live a healthy life. Needs are distinguished from wants because a deficiency would cause a clear negative outcome, such as dysfunction or death. Needs can be objective and physical, such as food, or they can be subjective and psychological, such as the need for self-esteem.
During therapy yesterday, Jennifer asked me to make sure I'm getting what I need from this relationship. I told her I never thought about my needs and what they are, I always just thought about my wants from a relationship and fulfilling other people's needs not only in my relationship with Dom, but in my relationships with other people.... and maybe it's just that maternal side of me. She said I need to know what I need from a relationship because that's the foundation of ever knowing if Dom is right for me and if I'm right for him. She said that if he can't even fulfill things that I NEED from a relationship, I won't ever be truly happy. And it's not that it's something he's lacking on, but I have to know what my needs are and clarify them for both of us to see if they can be met. If not, if it seems too needy to Dom, then maybe we aren't right for each other.
I told her that I guess that's what I have to figure out now. So I'm on a quest to figure out what I need from a relationship and what I can do without. I told her that communicating with Dom through this journal is helping a lot. I'm able to be completely honest and open about everything without any fear and it feels good to get it out. And Dom can choose to read or not read, to understand or ignore certain things, and that works for me.
During therapy yesterday, Jennifer asked me to make sure I'm getting what I need from this relationship. I told her I never thought about my needs and what they are, I always just thought about my wants from a relationship and fulfilling other people's needs not only in my relationship with Dom, but in my relationships with other people.... and maybe it's just that maternal side of me. She said I need to know what I need from a relationship because that's the foundation of ever knowing if Dom is right for me and if I'm right for him. She said that if he can't even fulfill things that I NEED from a relationship, I won't ever be truly happy. And it's not that it's something he's lacking on, but I have to know what my needs are and clarify them for both of us to see if they can be met. If not, if it seems too needy to Dom, then maybe we aren't right for each other.
I told her that I guess that's what I have to figure out now. So I'm on a quest to figure out what I need from a relationship and what I can do without. I told her that communicating with Dom through this journal is helping a lot. I'm able to be completely honest and open about everything without any fear and it feels good to get it out. And Dom can choose to read or not read, to understand or ignore certain things, and that works for me.