fic: Malibu Jared© (part two)

[_mournthewicked]

[back to part one.]





Jensen’s stomach is growling, which isn’t unusual because Jensen rarely stops working to eat lunch. If anything it’s dehydrated noodles from the vending machine and then back to work.

His stomach is growling and he has a presentation at two and he’s so nervous he could puke. Tom wanders over and sits on the corner of Jensen’s desk. He is so not in the mood to deal with Tom.

“What’s up, Ackles?” Tom asks. Jensen looks up at him from over his glasses.

“My blood pressure,” Jensen mumbles. “Did you need something? I’m kinda busy.”

“I was just wondering if you’re ready to jump back into the dating pool yet,” Tom says. “I know a guy you’d be perfect for.”

Jensen lets a breath out through his nose. Irritation bubbles under his skin and he opens his mouth to tell Tom off, but what he sees over Tom’s shoulder cuts him off.

Jared is walking through the cubicles like he owns the place, sunglasses over his eyes and Malibu grin stretched wide. He has a basket in one hand and a smoothie in the other. Jensen stands up just as Jared reaches his desk. Tom looks over his shoulder at Jared and does a small double-take. Jensen furrows his brow and steps forward. Jared sets his items on Jensen’s desk and pulls him into a standard Jared hug.

“Hi,” Jensen says softly into Jared’s ear. He doesn’t want anyone to hear this conversation. “How’d you know where I worked?”

“I’ve only been here a thousand times,” Jared replies just as softly. Jensen rolls his eyes at himself. He’s been here a thousand times in Ryan’s pocket. Jensen pulls away from Jared and turns to see Tom grinning like a jackass.

“Who’s this?” Tom asks. Jared pushes his sunglasses up into his perfect hair and smiles at Tom. It’s not a Jensen-smile and certainly not a Ryan-smile, but it’s polite enough.

“This is my - he’s… “ Jensen trails off and clears his throat. “This is Jared.”

“Hey Tom,” Jared says. “I just dropped by to bring Jensen some lunch and I’m sure he doesn’t have much time, so if you’ll please excuse us?”

“Oh, sure.” Tom looks from Jared to Jensen in a way that Jensen assumes means he’ll be pumped for info later. “Nice to meet you.”

Tom walks away and Jensen drops down into his chair. Jared sits on the edge of his desk and smiles at Jensen. It makes Jensen feel warm all over, cared for.

“How’d you get here?” Jensen asks. Jared smirks and starts to unload the basket.

“There’s this magical thing called the bus!” Jared says sarcastically. “This world is full of so many wonderful things!” Jensen laughs and Jared smiles. “I was bored. Made you food.”

“I’m ravenous,” Jensen tells him. “Your timing couldn’t be better.”

“Lucky you,” Jared says. He sets the smoothie down in front of Jensen. “Orange-pineapple, your favorite, with a brain boost.” Jensen grabs it and slurps some down. Jared unloads the little basket. “Chicken salad sandwich on honey wheat, apple slices, and a pickle spear. And there’s also some cookies I just baked in there.”

“Wow,” Jensen says. He looks over the spread and then up at Jared’s handsome face. It doesn’t look plastic anymore. It’s happy and bright and real. “You’re perfect. …Uh, I mean that this is perfect. Thank you.”

Jensen takes great pleasure in watching Jared’s cheeks flush pink for the very first time.

“You’re welcome,” Jared says fondly. He stares at Jensen for a moment and then blinks. He stands up and puts his sunglasses back over his eyes. “I should be going. I’m in the middle of constructing an epic pillow fort in the apartment. I want to surprise Ryan when she gets home from aftercare.”

“You do that,” Jensen chuckles. Their positions aren’t exactly conducive for a hug, so Jensen places his hand over Jared’s where it rests on the desk and finds Jared’s pulse with his thumb before pressing down softly. Jared shivers visibly. “Have fun.”

“Yeah,” Jared replies dreamily. “Good luck on your conversation. Uh, I mean your presentation. …Okay, I need to go catch the bus.”

Jared turns to leave and Jensen watches him until he’s out of sight. Then he eats his delicious lunch and drinks his brain-boosting smoothie.

And after that? He absolutely nails his presentation.



There are no pillows on Jensen’s bed. Or sheets, for that matter.

In fact, every item from the linen closet is out in the living room taking part in Jared’s fort. It stretches from the couch to the entertainment center and over to the kitchen table that Jared pushed over.

Jensen and Ryan are somewhere deep within the fortress, nestled in a cocoon of darkness and warmth. The only light comes from the television dragged inside for entertainment. The comforting scent of fabric softener is all around them and Ryan is curled up against her father’s chest.

Jared is in the kitchen making popcorn. It’s movie night here in Fort Ryan.

“Do you like having Jared here?” Ryan asks suddenly. Jensen’s fingers stop combing through her long hair and he wraps his arm around her. She looks up at him with green eyes that are bright even in the dim light.

“I do,” Jensen says honestly. Ryan smiles serenely. “Why do you ask?”

“Is he making you happy?” Ryan asks. Jensen furrows his brow and ponders the question. Ryan looks at him expectantly and Jensen bites his lip.

“He makes you happy,” Jensen tells her. “And when you’re happy, I’m very happy.”

Ryan doesn’t seem exactly pleased with this answer. She turns her gaze back towards the DVD menu playing on the television and Jensen isn’t sure what he did wrong. Jared crawls into the fort at that moment, balancing a large bowl of popcorn on his forearms. He settles next to Jensen and Ryan and leans back against the overturned sofa.

Ryan sits up and sets the bowl of popcorn in her lap. Jensen pushes play on the remote and then Ryan takes his arm and pulls it over her shoulders. She does the same with Jared’s arm and then slips down. She watches the movie and munches on popcorn and Jared and Jensen’s fingertips brush each other’s as their arms rest along the back of the couch.

After awhile, Jared suddenly threads their fingers together while grabbing some popcorn with his other hand. Jared’s fingers are soft and warm and they squeeze Jensen’s hand almost imperceptibly. Jensen watches the movie. He eats popcorn.

He doesn’t let go.



Jensen comes home to an interesting sight on Friday.

Jared and Ryan are dressed in nearly identical outfits. They have on flip-flops, shorts, Hawaiian shirts, sunglasses, and straw hats. White sunscreen covers their noses and they’re plopped on beach towels watching a surf competition on television.

“Hi,” Jensen says through a chuckle. Ryan and Jared both turn their heads in unison to look at him, nod casually, and then turn back to the television. Jensen laughs and sets his briefcase down on the dining table. Misha is sitting at the kitchen counter eating an ice cream sundae. He’s surrounded by children.

He still isn’t completely comfortable leaving Jared alone with Ryan. It’s not that he doesn’t trust Jared. It’s just that, well, he was a doll two weeks ago. There are too many variables left open, too many things Jensen isn’t yet sure won’t go wrong.

“Thanks Misha,” Jensen says as he loosens his tie and grabs a can of soda from the fridge. “I had no idea that meeting was going to run so long.”

“No problem, man,” Misha says as he licks his spoon clean. That’s when Jensen notices that he’s wearing pajama bottoms and has a story notebook open in front of him. He doesn’t look like he’s going anywhere soon.

“What’s up?” Jensen asks, gesturing at his outfit. “Don’t you have plans tonight?”

“I don’t,” Misha says with a smirk. Jensen raises an eyebrow in question. Misha points his spoon at Jensen’s face. “You do.”

“What are you talking about?” Jensen replies. “I don’t have plans.”

“Hey man.” Misha holds up his hands in surrender. “Talk to the little one. It’s her diabolical plan, not mine.”

Jensen narrows his eyes suspiciously at Misha, who looks like he’s trying to stifle a laugh. Jensen pulls his tie over his head and turns towards the living room. “Ryan!”

Jared comes into the kitchen a few moments later with a giggling Ryan on his back.

“What’s up, dude?” Ryan says as she pushes her sunglasses up her nose and holds out her thumb and pinky fingers. “Hang ten!”

“What is Misha talking about?” Jensen asks. Ryan tilts her head to the side and then nods. She taps Jared’s shoulder and he sets her gently on the ground.

“Oh, you’re going out to dinner,” Ryan says plainly. Jared lights up.

“Are we going to Red Robin again?” Jared asks. “That place was awesome and the kid’s menu was fantastic.”

“Nooooo,” Ryan replies, drawing the word out into four syllables. She points her finger at Jensen. “You.” The finger whirls on Jared. “And you are going to dinner. Not me.”

“Not her,” Misha agrees. “Ryan and I are going to eat ice cream and work on my new book.”

Jensen looks over at Jared who shrugs and scratches the back of his head. He looks as confused as Jensen feels. Ryan looks at them and then rolls her eyes exasperatedly. She puts her hands on her hips and faces them.

“You’re going on a date, sillies!” Her sunglasses slip down her slick little nose and she pushes them up again, smearing sunscreen across her cheeks. “I made Uncle Misha make a, um, thing at um, that place.”

“A reservation at Valentino’s,” Misha clarifies. Ryan claps her hands and then nods excitedly. Her sunglasses give up and clatter to the floor to reveal wide green eyes.

“Yeah, that.” Jensen stares blankly at his daughter and Jared’s cheeks flush bright pink. “No, you can’t say no. You like him and he likes you and people that like each other make resertations for spaghetti.”

“Reservations, baby doll,” Misha corrects. Ryan nods adamantly.

“That’s what I said.” When Jensen continues to gape at her like a fish, she starts to pout. “It’s almost my birthday. You have to.”

“Your birthday isn’t for another month,” Jensen reminds her. She furrows her brow.

“Um. Christmas?”

“Nine months.”

“Just go, okay!” Ryan gets behind Jensen and starts pushing him towards his bedroom. “You’ll have fun. I know it!”

Jensen stumbles forward at the insistence of the little hands on his butt that are forcefully propelling him down the hallway. He looks over at Jared to see that he is looking down with a surprised, pleased smile on his face. Jensen’s stomach flutters and he ducks into his bedroom all on his own.



“No.”

Jensen sighs and holds up another shirt.

“Ew, no.” Jensen resists the urge to bash his head against the closet door. He’s nervous enough already. “Daddy! Don’t wear a tie. Wear pink!”

“I’m not wearing pink,” Jensen tells her. He spins around to face her, clad only in a pair of boxer briefs and black socks. “What’s Jared wearing, huh? Why don’t you go bother him?”

“Uh, Jared is a style icon.” Ryan looks at him like he should know this. “I’m not worried about Jared.”

Jensen takes a deep breath and looks at her pleadingly. His heart is pounding. He’s never been this nervous for a date. In that moment Jared isn’t the guy that used to be a doll. He’s the guy that loves his daughter and bakes him cookies and smiles so bright it rivals the sun.

He can’t mess this up.

“Wear the green, Daddy,” Ryan says. He looks up at her and she nods encouragingly. She touches the corner of her eye and smiles. “The green. It brings out our eyes.”



Valentino’s is a quiet little romantic bistro downtown that Jensen knows for a fact Ryan hasn’t set foot in. So the setting was all Misha’s choosing. In fact, Misha probably had just as much of a hand in this as Ryan did. Jensen just can’t see her caring enough to plan all of this on her own.

Jensen finally settled on a dark green button down and charcoal grey slacks. He put in his contacts and even mussed up his hair a little. Jared, of course, puts him to shame. Misha must have taken him shopping because the clothes he’s wearing definitely aren’t from the clearance rack at Target.

He’s wearing a light grey button down with violet pinstripes paired with black slacks. His hair is almost doll-perfect and his cheeks are flushed with color.

Their waiter stops by after they’ve been seated and Jensen orders a beer. Jared surprises him by asking for the house wine and Jensen lets out a relieved breath when the waiter doesn’t ask for ID. Jared doesn’t even have a last name, let alone a driver’s license.

Jared doesn’t really meet his eyes and Jensen stares at the flickering flame of the candle in the center of their small table.

“I’m sorry. I know you probably don’t want to be here,” Jared says quietly over the top of his menu. He lets it fall to the table and the gust of air nearly blows out the candle. “I swear I didn’t know anything about this.”

“What makes you think I don’t want to be here?” Jensen asks. Jared shrugs and bites down on his lip, eyes trained on the tablecloth. “Jared, no. I’m just - I’m nervous. I, well, I really like you, okay? I don’t want to screw this up.”

“Really?” Jared grins so brightly that Jensen’s heart clenches. Jared’s shoulders slump into a more relaxed curve and he picks up his menu again. “I like you too. A lot, actually.”

“Well then,” Jensen starts. He can feel his cheeks heating up and his stomach is flipping like a teenager at his first dance. “Good thing Ryan made us get our act together.”

“She’s a smart girl,” Jared says, and Jensen is inclined to agree.



Jensen is still chuckling when they get into the car after dinner.

He has the flower from the vase on their table behind his ear and Jared is crunching on an after-dinner mint. Jensen turns to look at Jared and he snags the rose from behind his ear. He places it between his teeth and then wiggles his eyebrows at Jensen, who laughs and puts his hands over his face.

“Don’t tell Ryan I didn’t order spaghetti,” Jared suddenly demands. “She told me I should order spaghetti.”

“If Ryan had her way, she’d eat spaghetti every single day,” Jensen replies. Jared grins and shoves the rose behind his own ear.

“That rhymed,” Jared says. Jensen smirks and rests his hands on the steering wheel. This is the first moment he’s felt awkward since they ordered their food. He forgot to account for the fact that at the end of the night, Jared is still going home with him. There’s no goodbye. He isn’t sure what is supposed to happen next. “Hey Jensen?”

“Yeah?” Jensen replies. Jared’s voice is thoughtful and hesitant and Jensen turns his head to look at him. Jared meets his gaze and his eyes are wide and hopeful in the moonlight.

“It’s still early, right? I mean, we don’t have to go home yet?”

“I suppose not,” Jensen replies. Misha was prepared to spend the night and he told Jensen to take his time. “Why?”

“Well, I was wondering - or more like hoping, really,” Jared trails off and clears his throat. “Could we go to the beach?”

“The beach?” Jensen asks. He sits back in the driver’s seat and ponders distances and traffic at this time of night. It would probably take half an hour or so from where they are right now. He’s not opposed to the idea. It’s just an odd request. But then he looks at Jared, and it isn’t so strange. Jared is used to the ocean being right there every single day. Jensen nods and turns the key in the ignition. “Sure,” Jensen replies. “We can do that.”

The drive is spent in comfortable silence. Jared looks out of the windows, eyes studying the lit up city skyline. Jared sits up straight once they reach the waterline, gazing longingly at the waves gently lapping at the shore.

Jensen pays the parking attendant and maneuvers into a spot. It’s not that late in the evening and it’s a Friday, so there are still people dotting the beach. Jared gets out of the car and Jensen follows suit. They take off their shoes and socks and stick them in the backseat along with Jensen’s wallet and cell phone, and then they roll up their slacks before heading out onto the sand. Jared doesn’t stop until the water rolls over his feet and Jensen comes to stand next to him.

Jared closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. Jensen watches his face with rapt fascination. The wind blows Jared’s hair back from his face and the moon makes his skin glow. He looks at home here on the beach, where the salty breeze can envelop him and the damp sand can stick to his feet.

Jared finally opens his eyes and turns to look at Jensen. His eyes shine with gratitude and Jensen blushes slightly. He hopes that it’s dark enough that Jared won’t see the color on his cheeks.

“Thank you,” Jared says lowly. He grins and Jensen is nearly bowled over by his beauty. It’s accentuated here in the moonlight bouncing off of the water. Jared holds out his hand and Jensen takes it, warm fingers slotting together as Jared leads him out into the water. It’s freezing and Jensen’s slacks are soaked, salt water and sand swirling around his thighs. He shivers and Jared wraps one arm around his waist to pull him in close.

Jensen doesn’t take the time to wonder what the people dotting the beach must be thinking, two grown men in dress clothes in water waist deep, embracing under the stars. Jensen just wraps his arms around Jared’s body and drinks in his warmth.

Jared’s fingers curl under Jensen’s chin and raise it so their eyes can meet. Jared’s face, backlit by the moon and stars, takes Jensen’s breath away more than the cold water seeping into his skin. Jared cups Jensen’s cheek in one hand and he shivers, but it’s not from the cold.

“What do you think?” Jared whispers. He must mean the ocean, but Jensen can hardly breathe and it doesn’t matter where they are because he can’t take his eyes off of Jared.

“I think none of this is as beautiful as you,” Jensen whispers without meaning to. It’s the most honest thing he’s ever said, and he can’t even regret letting the words slip out.

Jared leans in, one hand cupping the back of Jensen’s head as the other presses against the small of his back. Their lips brush, cool and dry, and Jensen closes his eyes. Another second passes where they just drink each other in, and then Jared kisses him.

Jensen responds immediately, tangling his fingers in the back of Jared’s shirt as he returns the kiss. It starts off gentle and slow but then Jared is licking his way into Jensen’s mouth and all he can do is slump boneless against Jared’s chest. He’s never been kissed like this before, never so intensely, never with such passion behind it. Jared kisses him like he really means it, like nothing would make him happier than to spend the rest of eternity kissing Jensen under the stars, waist-deep in freezing cold water.

They’re not really paying attention to the water and a sudden wave knocks them both over. Jensen gasps when he’s fully engulfed and then resurfaces, laughing and choking. Jared is grinning like a lunatic and he grabs Jensen’s hand and pulls him out of the water. Jensen is laughing too hard to really help, tripping over waterlogged slacks that have become unrolled.

They run across the sand and when they reach Jensen’s car, Jared pushes him up against it. Jensen is shivering violently but when Jared’s lips press against his again, he lets out a soft moan and kisses him back.

The temperature seems to sober them both up and they pull away to stare at each other. Jared’s hands are on Jensen’s cheeks and Jensen’s hands are on Jared’s hips, thumbs skirting across flesh pebbled by the cold.

“Tell me you want this, Jensen,” Jared pleads. His eyes are wide and dark and his hair is plastered against his face. His expression is desperate and scared and he’s never looked more human. “I need you to want this.”

“I do,” Jensen says immediately. He squeezes Jared’s hips and pulls his soaking body tighter against his. “I want this. I want you, Jared. Now kiss me. Please kiss me.”

Jared smiles and presses their mouths together. A soft ocean breeze whips around them and Jared curls himself around Jensen, protecting him from the chill as seawater drips from their clothes.



Nobody gets what you would call an early start the next morning.

It’s after ten before Jensen finally rolls out of bed. He still feels chilly, even after a hot shower and an extra blanket. He’s sure Jared could have warmed him up, but they managed to retreat to separate beds after coming home.

Ryan and Jared are sitting on the floor in front of the couch that Misha is still passed out on. They’re eating cereal and watching cartoons. Jensen’s heart thump-thumps and he pours himself a cup of coffee.

“Morning,” Jensen says as he approaches. Ryan grins up at him and her lips are shiny with purple milk. He gives Jared a private smile and his lips tingle when Jared returns the sentiment.

“Hi Daddy,” Ryan says. “Jared says you guys had fun.”

“We did,” Jensen replies. Ryan smirks and looks at Jensen like she knew it all along, like she’s some diabolical genius. Hell, with all she’s done maybe she is. “Aunt Danny’s gonna be here soon. You need to get ready to go.”

“Oh yeah!” Ryan jumps up and hands her cereal bowl to Jensen. “It’s girls’ day!”

Jensen shares a look with Jared as she tears off into her bedroom and then Jensen takes the spoon from the bowl and hits Misha in the nose with it. He makes a snuffling sound and turns his face towards Jensen without opening his eyes.

“What?” He grumbles.

“Wake up, freeloader,” Jensen tells him. Misha sits up and regards them with one eye open. His hair is sticking up in a million different directions and he yawns blearily. He looks from Jensen to Jared and then back again.

“Knew it,” he says as he gets up to go to the bathroom. “Totally gone for each other.”

Jensen blushes and smiles at Jared before going to put the bowl in the sink. He heads into Ryan’s room to brush her unruly hair into a ponytail and she watches him through the mirror.

“You like him, huh?” She asks. Jensen clears his throat as he puts a pink rubber band in her hair. He crouches down and spins her around.

“I like him,” he says honestly. He puts his hands on her shoulders and looks up into her eyes. They’re so green, so bright and full of life. “He makes me happy, baby.”

“I knew he would,” Ryan tells him as she puts her little hands on his cheeks. She leans in and presses their foreheads together. “I’m smart, Daddy.”

The doorbell rings and Jensen scoops Ryan up in his arms. He comes into the living room to see Danneel pushing her sunglasses into her hair and looking Jared up and down. Jensen walks over to them and leans in to kiss Danneel’s cheek.

“Morning,” he says. He puts Ryan down and she runs off to finish her cartoon. Jensen decides not to mention the hot guy in pajama pants and nothing else in his apartment on a Saturday morning. Jared is practically bouncing. He must be dying to hug Danneel.

“Hi, I’m Jared,” he says brightly. He reaches out to shake Danneel’s hand and she takes it while tilting her head to the side.

“Danneel,” she says. She lets go of Jared’s hand and adjusts her purse strap. “You look really familiar. Have we met?”

Misha comes out of the bathroom at that moment and lets out a snort. He gives Danneel a nod and then collapses in a pile on top of Ryan. She squeals and pushes ineffectually at him.

“Uh, no,” Jared says awkwardly. Jensen sits down at the kitchen counter and picks up the newspaper. “I’m sort of new around here.”

Danneel’s head snaps to the left to pin Jensen with an inquisitive gaze and Jensen lifts the newspaper in front of his face to block it. He knows she wants info but he needs time to get his story straight.

“Alright,” Danneel says slowly. She gives Jared one last lingering look before heading over to the Misha-Ryan tickle party smackdown. “Hey princess! Are you ready to stop torturing Misha and go shopping with me?”

Ryan looks at her and then at Misha. She shoots her hand out to tickle his side once more before hopping off of the couch and diving behind Danneel. Misha squawks and then sits up on the sofa.

“Hi Danny,” she says. Ryan grabs her backpack from by the door and puts it on. “I’m ready.”

“Okay, awesome.” She looks at Ryan’s backpack and the empty front pocket, and then at her empty hands. “Hey, where’s your…” She trails off and slowly spins on her heels to face Jared. She looks him up and down again and her eyes widen. “… Jared doll?”

Misha jumps up and grabs his bag, snags his keys off of the hook and pushes Danneel towards the door.

“Let’s go, Danny!” He calls. “There’s shopping to be done!”

“What’s going on?” Danneel cries. Jensen laughs and Jared shifts awkwardly. Ryan giggles diabolically. Misha rolls his eyes and wraps his arm around Danneel’s waist as he pulls her out of the apartment.

“I’ll explain over coffee,” Misha says. Jared gives her a wave and a bright Malibu smile. Danneel’s eyes look like they’re about to pop out of their sockets.

“It is!” Danneel cries. “Oh my - “

The door shuts and cuts her off. With Danneel, Misha, and Ryan gone the apartment is strangely quiet. Jensen sets his newspaper down and looks over at Jared.

“Is she going to be okay with this?” Jared asks. He looks legitimately worried, puffy bottom lip pulled between his perfect teeth. Jensen gets up and walks over to him.

“She’ll be fine,” Jensen says. He shifts his weight from foot to foot and looks up at Jared. “Misha will explain it to her.”

Jared nods and Jensen slowly rises up on his toes to press their lips together. He isn’t sure if this is allowed now that the magic spell of the beach and the moonlight has been broken. Even after sleeping on it, even after thinking about all the obstacles and all the reasons why he shouldn’t, Jensen wants this.

Jared kisses him back, wraps his arms around Jensen’s waist and drags him over to the sofa. He falls backwards onto it and Jensen falls on top of him; hips slotting together, knees slipping between thighs. Jensen buries his fingers in Jared’s hair and kisses with all his might, kisses with all he has to give.

Jared lets out a soft moan and slips his hand under Jensen’s shirt, fingers dancing across the smooth skin of his back. Jensen trembles at the touch and cups Jared’s cheek in his hand. He can feel the barest hint of stubble under his fingertips and he smiles. It’s proof that Jared is changing and growing. He’s real and warm and alive under Jensen’s fingers.

“Oh god, this is perfect,” Jared mumbles against Jensen’s swollen lips. “You’re so perfect.”

Jensen pulls back and puts his hands on Jared’s cheeks. His thumbs sweep under Jared’s gorgeous tilted eyes and Jensen’s eyes trace the slope of his sharp-tipped nose and his pink lips. Jensen’s fingers go to Jared’s lips and he smiles against them. Jensen traces the curve of that Malibu grin with the tip of his finger and then leans down to kiss Jared again.

This really is perfect.



“So, since you guys are boyfriends now,” Ryan says a few days later, “we should go get ice cream to celebrate.”

Jared and Jensen look at each other over Ryan’s head and shrug. Well, that was probably the easiest boyfriend talk Jensen has ever had. Just let the kid decide when you’re officially dating and then go out for ice cream.

“Did you finish your homework?” Jensen asks. They’re in the kitchen washing dishes. Or well, Jensen is washing, Jared is drying, and Ryan is sitting on the counter and watching.

“Um, yes?”

“Ryan,” Jensen says warningly. “Did you finish it or not?”

“Okay fine, I didn’t finish it,” Ryan says with a pout. “If I finish it can we go get ice cream?”

Jared catches his eye and nods slowly, eyes wide with excitement. Jensen chuckles and checks his watch.

“We can,” Jensen replies. “But only if you finish it by eight. You’re not getting sugar any later than that, devil child.”

Ryan claps her hands together and jumps off of the counter. Jared ruffles her hair as she runs by. Seconds later, they hear the slap of her backpack against the kitchen table, followed quickly by the zipper.

“Someone wants ice cream.” Jensen chuckles and hands the last dish over to Jared. He dries it, puts it away, and then gently pushes Jensen against the counter. He presses his lips to the hollow of Jensen’s throat and slowly drags them up until they’re pressed against Jensen’s ear.

“Is it bad that all I want to do is kiss you?” Jared breathes. “Kiss you all the time and never stop?”

“Not bad,” Jensen replies. He turns his head and their lips meet. Jared lets out a soft sigh and lifts Jensen up to sit on the counter. Tongues tangle and hands roam, dishes clink as their kiss gets heated.

It’s been days. Days of endless kisses and burning tension. It’s building up, getting hotter and hotter, and Jensen knows it’s soon going to burst. His entire body aches for Jared, and he kisses him even harder.

“Ahem!” They break apart to see Ryan standing at the entrance of the kitchen, holding a piece of paper and a pencil. “I’m done with my homework, so if you two are done being icky, can we go?”

Jensen flushes red and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. He can’t believe he just got caught making out with his boyfriend like a teenager by his daughter. Ryan has never seen him kiss anyone before, and he’s surprised at how easily she takes it. He assumes a large chunk of that is that it’s Jared he’s kissing, per her master plan. Anyone else and he probably would have had a very unhappy little girl on his hands.

“Sure thing, kid,” Jensen says. Jared grins and steps away so he can slide off of the counter. “Put on your jacket.”

The three of them leave the apartment together, hand in hand in hand with Ryan in the middle. Her new favorite activity is to suddenly pull her feet out from under herself and nearly jerk Jared and Jensen’s arms out of their sockets. They swing her back and forth between them in the parking lot and she giggles as she climbs into the car.

The three of them get their ice cream (chocolate with sprinkles for Ryan, bubblegum for Jared, and vanilla for Dad because he’s boring) and all sit at a table.

Jared puffs his cheeks out, balances his spoon on his nose, and crosses his eyes. Ryan lets out a loud childish giggle and Jensen nearly chokes on his ice cream. Ryan makes Jensen try her ice cream and Jared makes Ryan try his. Pretty soon the spoons are just moving in rotation and Ryan has ice cream smeared all over her lips.

An employee busses the table behind them and looks over when Ryan lets out a delighted squeal. She pauses as she walks by and leans in.

“I’m sorry, but you are a gorgeous family,” she says, and then walks back behind the counter. Jensen blinks and Ryan grins proudly. Jared looks over at Jensen and his eyes are hopeful but apprehensive. Jensen tangles their fingers together under the table. Ryan lets out another shrill squeal.

Definitely too much sugar.



“Daddy,” Ryan mumbles.

“Yes baby.” He’s carrying her to bed with both arms after she passed out in Jared’s lap after the sugar crash. He places her in bed and tucks her in, but she doesn’t say anything. “What is it, Ryan?”

“I like this,” she says sleepily. Jensen tilts his head to the side.

“You like what?” He asks. Ryan yawns and rubs at her eyes. She looks at Jensen and reaches out to touch his hand.

“It doesn’t feel like it’s just me and Daddy anymore,” she says softly. “It feels like I have a family. ‘S what I wanted and I like it.”

Jensen’s heart clenches and his eyes immediately glisten with unshed tears. Ryan doesn’t seem to notice. She just pats the back of his hand again.

“I’m happy and you’re happy and Jared is happy.” She’s barely even awake now and Jensen has to strain to make out her words. “That’s,” she pauses to yawn, “how it’s s’posed to be. ‘M tired, Daddy.”

“Sleep, baby girl,” Jensen chokes out. “I love you so much.”

“Mm, love you, Daddy.” Jensen strokes her hair until she falls asleep and then leans in to gently kiss her forehead. He wipes his eyes as he walks back into the living room. Jared is flipping through the channels but he drops the remote when he sees Jensen.

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

Jensen lets out an embarrassed laugh and sits down next to Jared. He picks up his hand and squeezes it in his own. His heart feels so big it’s like he can’t even contain it. A small laugh bubbles up and spills over his lips.

“I just really love my kid,” Jensen tells him. He looks into Jared’s eyes and is momentarily breathless. “I’m just… really happy.”

“Good,” Jared replies. He pulls Jensen close and kisses the corner of his eye. “You should be happy.”

He realizes as he curls up with his boyfriend that yeah, he’s the happiest he’s ever been.



For the last three days, Jensen has allowed Jared to pick up Ryan from her aftercare center up the street and walk her home. At first it was incredibly nerve-wracking for Jensen, allowing someone that wasn’t Danneel or Misha to care for his daughter. Especially since Jared wasn’t even alive a month ago.

But Jared would die before he let any harm befall that little girl, and he’s proven himself to Jensen. It’s working out well so far.

“Ryan.” Jensen is whispering harshly into his cell phone at his desk, glancing furtively around the office. “I’m sorry that we’re out of Trix but I promise I will get some later. …Baby, just eat the Apple Jacks. No, Ryan. It’s snack time anyway, not breakfast. Have Jared make you a PB&J.”

Someone walks up to his cubicle and he looks up to see Alona. She’s a friendly, pretty girl that just so happens to be the receptionist for Mr. Morgan, who just so happens to be one of the firm’s partners. Jensen’s eyes widen when he sees her.

“Ryan, I have to go,” Jensen says. He rolls his eyes and holds the phone out in front of him. “Eat a sandwich, Ryan, and I’ll bring the Trix home tonight!”

He snaps the phone shut and gives Alona a wide smile. She smiles back and chuckles.

“Kids, gotta love ‘em,” she says. Jensen nods. “Mr. Morgan wants to see you in his office.”

“Me?” Jensen squeaks. Tom’s head pops up three cubicles over and Jensen’s throat goes dry. “Uh, sure. I’ll walk back with you?”

Alona nods and Jensen gets up to follow her. He straightens his tie and flattens his hair with the palm of his hand. Alona smirks when he nearly trips on his way into the elevator.

“Relax, Jensen,” she chuckles. “He’s a nice guy. Doesn’t bite or anything.”

Jensen lets out a sound that probably could be construed as laughter. The elevator pings and Jensen follows Alona out. This floor is all the executives, all the big wigs and important people. Jensen really wants to be on this floor.

Alona ducks her head in Morgan’s office and then nods him in as she takes her seat at her desk. Jensen takes a deep breath and walks in. Morgan motions for him to shut the door and take a seat, so he does.

“You wanted to see me, sir?” Jensen asks. He smiles politely and tries not to fidget. Morgan smiles at him. He hasn’t had much face time with the man, but he admires him a great deal. He’s a brilliant architect and an amazing mind, and there was no firm Jensen wanted to work at more than his.

“Sure did, Jensen,” Morgan tells him. “I expect I’ll be seeing you at the benefit dinner tomorrow?”

“Uh.” Jensen blinks. He wasn’t planning on attending, but hey, plans can change in the blink of an eye. “Of course.”

“Good, good.” Morgan smiles at him again. Jensen swallows. “You can use it as an excuse to celebrate.”

“Celebrate?” Jensen asks. Morgan gets up and comes to sit on the corner of his desk, facing Jensen.

“Your promotion,” Morgan adds. Jensen’s stomach flips. “I’d think making junior partner would be a very good reason to celebrate.”

“Are you kidding me?” Jensen blurts. Morgan chuckles and Jensen tries not to blush. “Of course you aren’t kidding. Just, wow. Thank you, sir.”

“No thanks necessary,” Morgan tells him with a wave of his hand. “You earned it. Now, we can talk logistics on Monday morning. Be here at say, nine?”

“Sure, of course,” Jensen agrees. He’s so happy he could burst. This is what he’s been working so hard for. “Thanks again.”

“You’re welcome. You’ll do great,” Morgan tells him. “I’ll see you tomorrow night. And don’t show up alone. I want to see a guy on your arm. This is a celebration, after all.”

Jensen starts a little at that. He isn’t sure how a partner knows about his sexuality, but then remembers that Tom and Alona are the biggest gossips in the entire company. Jensen just smiles tightly and nods.

Shit. Now he has to find a tuxedo. Strike that. Two tuxedos.



Jensen really hadn’t wanted to deal with Ryan and tuxedo shopping, so he gave his measurements to Jared and Misha and sent them on their way.

Now Jensen is sitting on the sofa in his tuxedo and Misha is helping him with his bowtie. Ryan is standing off to the side. Her head is cocked to the side and she’s holding Sandy by her left foot. Jared is in the bathroom and has been for the last half an hour.

“You look very pretty, Daddy,” Ryan says. Jensen blinks and turns to look at her. Misha grabs his chin and tells him to hold still.

“Thanks baby,” Jensen says out of the side of his mouth. “Are you excited for your sleepover with Uncle Misha?”

“Yep!” She points to her little pink duffle bag by the door. “I’m all packed. We’re gonna make s’mores.”

“We’re gonna camp in my backyard,” Misha says. He finishes up with Jensen’s bowtie and steps back to make sure it’s straight. “I got a new telescope and I want to try it out.”

“Don’t let my kid get eaten by a bear,” Jensen says as he gets up and grabs Ryan. He spins her in a circle and she laughs.

“I’ll try,” Misha replies drolly. “You know bears are the number one threat to my gated community.”

“Should we go see what’s taking Jared so long?” Jensen says as he presses his forehead against Ryan’s. She nods and kisses the end of Jensen’s nose. He walks her down the hallway and she leans out to rap her knuckles against the door.

“Jared!” She calls. “Come see how pretty my Daddy is.”

The bathroom door opens and Jared steps out. Jensen nearly drops Ryan. She gasps and Jensen swallows.

“Wow,” Jensen and Ryan breathe in unison. Jared flushes pink and then gives a little bow. He looks gorgeous. The rented tux looks tailor made for his tall, muscular form and his hair is combed back into an elegant style, away from his perfect face.

“You look great,” Jensen says, and it’s such an understatement. Jared smiles and takes Ryan from him. He kisses her cheek and then looks Jensen up and down.

“You look better,” Jared replies easily. His eyes linger on the Sandy doll in Ryan’s hand, brow furrowing for just a moment before he looks back at Jensen with a bright smile. “Are we ready to go?”

Jensen nods and Jared sets Ryan down. She runs out into the living room and pulls on her backpack.

“Uncle Misha!” She cries. Misha hops off of the couch and grabs her duffle bag. “You said you were gonna take me to McDonald’s. Let’s go!”

“And I told you not to tell your dad,” Misha replies. “You just sold me up the river.”

“I’ll let it slide this time,” Jensen replies as he lowers into a crouch. “Bye, baby girl. Give me a hug.”

Ryan runs up to Jensen and hugs him tight. It’s not often that they’re separated overnight and Jensen is going to miss her. He kisses her forehead and then she runs over to hug Jared. He spins her around and sets her back down.

“Don’t worry, mama bear,” Misha tells Jensen. “She’ll be fine.”

“I know,” Jensen replies. He doesn’t trust anyone like he trusts Misha.

“Now you two have fun tonight. And I do mean fun,” Misha says. He wiggles his eyebrows and Jensen rolls his eyes and pushes him out the door. Ryan heads out after him and Jared and Jensen go downstairs to wait for their cab.



The benefit dinner is being held in the ballroom of some fancy hotel downtown, and Jared looks so excited as they head inside.

“A party!” He says happily. “A real party. This will be so much fun. Thanks for inviting me.”

“My boyfriend is required to suffer through stuffy work events with me,” Jensen mumbles. “It’s in the handbook.”

“I like when you call me that,” Jared says happily. Jensen smirks and it softens into a pleased smile when Jared takes his hand and leads him into the ballroom.

It’s all very elegant. There’s a string band playing in the corner and a refreshments table and bar off to one side. Half of the room is covered in tables for dinner and the other half is a dance floor. Jensen takes a deep breath and pulls Jared over towards the bar. They each get a glass of wine and turn to face each other.

“So we met - “

“ - at the grocery store,” Jared finishes cheekily. “Yep. So normal. No drama at all.”

Jensen laughs and his eyes are drawn to Jared’s wine-stained lips. He starts to lean in for a kiss but stops when he feels a hand on his shoulder. He turns to see Alona smiling at him. She looks fabulous and Jensen tells her so.

“Thanks Jensen. You look great.” She turns to look at Jared and raises an eyebrow in appreciation. “Hello. And you must be…?”

“Taken,” Jared answers with a wry smirk. “I’m Jared, Jensen’s boyfriend.”

“Ah, yes,” Alona replies. “I knew you were too cute to be straight. You two look gorgeous together. Just promise me a dance each later, and we’re good.”

“Sure,” Jared replies happily. “I’d love to, but it’ll be a miracle if we can even get Jensen on the floor.”

“I’m sure you have your ways,” Alona replies cheekily. She orders a glass of champagne and wanders back into the crowd.

“She’s cute,” Jared says. “Now, I’m pretty sure you were about to kiss me. You had that look in your eye.”

“A look?” Jensen asks. Jared leans in so close their lips nearly brush.

“A look,” Jared mumbles, and then presses their lips together. Jensen wants to sink into it but he can’t, not with so many people around, so he lets his lips linger for a few moments and then pulls away.

Jared smiles and orders them another round of wine.

After dinner, which was absolutely delicious, comes the dancing. Jared, of course, is a terrific dancer. He asks Jensen but he politely declines, for now anyway, and Jared bounces off to find Alona.

Soon enough there is an entire line of women waiting to be waltzed around the dance floor by Jared. His boyfriend is officially a hit. Jensen sits at their table, right on the edge of the floor, and sips wine as he watches Jared dance.

He’s incredibly graceful for someone his size and he leads the women around as if they were weightless. Jared smiles and it lights up the room. He’s more beautiful than any person should have the right to be, and Jensen can’t tear his eyes away.

A hand comes down on his shoulder and he looks over to see Mr. Morgan sitting down next to him at the empty table. Jensen sits up straight and tries to wipe the silly, Jared-induced grin off of his face. He’s pretty sure he fails.

“Having fun, Jensen?” Mr. Morgan asks. Jensen raises his wine glass with a nod and a smile. “You’re sitting off to the side like a seventh grader at his first dance.”

“Well,” Jensen chuckles. “I’m afraid my date has been otherwise occupied.” He gestures to Jared as he dips an attractive blonde woman and spins her around. She laughs like she’s having the time of her life.

“Oh, so that’s who has been so thoroughly entertaining my wife,” Morgan chuckles. Jensen laughs and takes a sip of his wine.

“I’m sure you have nothing to worry about,” Jensen assures him. Morgan laughs and takes another sip of his beer. He doesn’t look that much older than Jensen, barely more than a decade, but he seems so wise.

“A few fancy dance moves can’t get in the way of true love, kid.” Jensen nods and smiles widely. “Trust me.”

“I do,” Jensen replies. Jared saunters up at that moment, having left a flustered Mrs. Morgan at the bar. Jensen looks up as he approaches and grins widely. “Mr. Morgan, this is my boyfriend, Jared.”

“Good to meet you, sir,” Jared says as he shakes Morgan’s hand. “Linda was hoping that our dance would spark a fire under you, maybe get you to ask her yourself. She’s a lovely woman.”

“That she is,” Morgan replies. “Devious too.”

“If only I were devious enough to get Jensen to dance,” Jared says wistfully. Morgan nudges Jensen’s shoulder as he gets up.

“He was just about to ask you,” Morgan says with a wink. “Weren’t you, Jensen?”

“Um, sure,” Jensen says awkwardly. Jared grins and holds out his hand. Jensen takes it just as the band starts up a slow, romantic ballad. Jared drags him out into the middle of the floor and wraps one arm around Jensen’s waist. “Of course you have to lead.”

“I’m the one with the skills,” Jared replies with a silly grin. He takes Jensen’s hand and puts his on his shoulder. “No fancy stuff. Just move with me.”

Jared leads him in slow, lazy steps and Jensen follows as best he can. It’s not hard. He just goes where Jared tells him to. Soon they’re not really dancing at all, just swaying slightly with their arms wrapped around each other.

“Do you have any clue how beautiful you are?” Jared asks in a near whisper. Jensen smiles and lets out a chuckle when Jared spins him in a circle. He pulls Jensen back up against him and puts his fingers under Jensen’s chin. The smile falls from Jensen’s lips when he sees how serious his eyes are. “I’m absolutely crazy about you.”

“I know the feeling,” Jensen whispers intimately. They’re lost in a sea of people, bodies all around them, but they might as well be alone. They couldn’t tear their eyes away from each other if they tried. Jared strokes his fingertips over Jensen’s cheek and then closes the short distance between their lips.

Jensen lets his eyes slip shut as they kiss and wraps both arms around Jared’s waist. He loses himself in the press of their lips, forgets where they are, forgets who may be watching, and just pours everything he feels into it.

The music swells and Jensen’s knees weaken. This kiss is shaping up to be the best one Jensen has ever had, maybe the best one that anyone has ever had. His heart is beating triple time and his fingers are twisted in the back of Jared’s jacket. Something warm and intense is flowing through him, heating him up from head to toe.

It feels like love.

“Jared,” Jensen whispers breathlessly. He looks up into Jared’s colorful eyes and thinks he sees it there, whatever it is that he’s feeling. He curls his fingers around Jared’s elbow and presses his swollen lips to Jared’s ear. “Let’s go home.”

Jared kisses him again as the next song starts up, something fast and jazzy, and pulls him out of the room.



Jared is kissing him before Jensen can even close the door.

Jensen doesn’t know how they managed to keep away from each other during the cab ride home. They stared at each other the entire time, tension crackling as their hands stayed joined on the seat between them.

Now that they’re alone, it’s an entirely different story.

Jared pushes Jensen up against the wall and their lips crash back together. They tear at each other’s clothes, pulling off jackets and bowties and throwing them on the floor. Jared’s mouth fastens to the side of Jensen’s neck as his fingers go to the buttons of his dress shirt. He pulls it open and Jensen hears a button roll across the floor.

“Whoa, okay,” Jensen breathes. He puts his hands on Jared’s shoulders and pushes him back slightly. His hand slides down to rest over Jared’s heart and he nearly smiles when he feels how hard it’s beating. “This is a little intense. Can we just slow down for a minute?”

“Yeah,” Jared pants. He puts his hands on Jensen’s hips and squeezes. “You’re right. Sorry.”

“No, it’s just - it’s been a really long time,” Jensen admits, He puts his hand on Jared’s cheek and swipes his thumb under one eye. “And I just wanna take my time with you.”

“I’ve never…” Jared clears his throat and squeezes Jensen’s hips again. “This is all new to me.”

Jensen nods. Sometimes he forgets that Jared had a life before this one, somewhere else, somewhere Jensen could never go.

Jensen takes Jared’s hand and leads him to the bedroom. Moonlight floods the room and Jensen falls backwards onto the bed, pulling Jared on top of him. Their hips brush and Jensen lets out a soft gasp.

Jensen deftly unbuttons Jared’s dress shirt as they kiss and moans once he gets his hands on all that smooth, bare skin. He pushes the shirt off of Jared’s shoulders, hands skimming all along his torso while Jared gets Jensen’s shirt unbuttoned as well. Jared flips them over so Jensen is on top and he can pull the shirt off.

Jensen straddles Jared’s waist, eyes raking over his perfect chest and stomach. All he wants is to put his mouth on Jared’s skin, so he leans down and kisses his way down the middle of Jared’s chest before turning his head to lick and suck at Jared’s nipple. He arches up with a gasp and Jensen grins against damp flesh as his fingers work on Jared’s belt and pants. He wants them gone, wants his own gone, wants nothing at all between them.

He pulls Jared’s pants down his long, long legs and tosses them off the bed. Jared’s naked body is astounding, breathtakingly beautiful, and Jensen dips his head to press kisses along the spur of his hip. Jared’s hands are everywhere, on his face and in his hair and curling around his shoulders, and Jensen doesn’t even stop to think before he’s pulling Jared into his mouth.

Jared lets out a surprised moan and it only spurs Jensen on, makes him tighten his lips and suck harder. It’s been so long since he’s done this, but he hasn’t lost the taste for it. Jared is so hot and huge inside of his mouth and Jensen groans, gets eager and takes too much at once, gasps and pulls up. He curls one hand around Jared’s hip and slides the other up his chest. He rubs and squeezes and pinches at tight nipples as he blows Jared, wet and messy.

Jared lets out a litany of desperate noises, moans and gasps and stifled little whimpers. Finally he clenches, arches up, and pushes Jensen back by his shoulders. Jensen pulls off with a gasp and Jared hauls him up to kiss and lick the taste of himself out of Jensen’s mouth.

They roll over again, Jared back on top as he rids Jensen of his pants. Once he’s done he blankets Jensen’s body with his own, presses their bodies together skin to skin, and the feeling is overwhelming.

Jensen wraps his arms around Jared and moves with him, rocks against him and pants as the heat takes over. They’re kissing, always kissing, tongues tangling as their hands roam. It’s intense and passionate but at the same time so tender, even loving.

Jensen can feel that Jared is going purely on instinct here. Jensen knows it’s up to him to make this a wonderful experience and Jared is giving himself over fully to him. That trust is overwhelming and Jensen tightens his grip on Jared.

Jensen wants to deepen the connection, make them even closer. He rolls them over one last time and fits himself between Jared’s parted thighs, groaning as their hips slot together again. With great effort he manages to pull away from Jared’s addictive lips. He sucks on his own fingers, gets them slippery wet with spit, and then guides them between Jared’s legs. He presses the tip of his index finger against Jared’s entrance and then looks up at him, waits for their eyes to meet, and just barely presses his finger inside.

Words aren’t needed. They’ll only break the spell between them. Their connection goes deeper than anything words could ever hope to express. Jensen’s heart beats even faster as Jared licks his lips and nods, lifting his hips to give Jensen better access.

Jensen slides his finger inside slowly, all the way to the knuckle, and he watches as Jared’s body takes it. It’s so tight, incredibly tight, and Jensen leans down to lick across the tiny hole to make the glide easier. Jared jerks and grabs onto Jensen’s hair, tugs softly as Jensen whimpers and continues to lick and suck as his finger moves in and out.

Soon he has two fingers inside Jared and he’s quivering, shaking and aching with the need for more. He withdraws his fingers and nearly loses it at Jared’s protesting whimper. He digs through his nightstand for the lube he keeps for himself and squeezes some onto his fingers. He gets Jared slick and ready for him, makes sure he’ll feel the barest amount of pain, and then liberally coats his bare dick in the slippery liquid.

After wiping his hands on the sheets he fits himself between Jared’s legs. He instinctually wraps them around Jensen’s hips and Jensen kisses him again, hard and for a long time, before he presses his forehead against Jared’s and meets his gaze. Jared nods and his eyes are pleading. He kisses Jensen desperately and pulls with his legs, urging him inside.

Jensen kisses him hard as he slowly slides inside. Jared whimpers into the kiss and wraps his arms tight around Jensen’s shoulders, fingertips digging into his back as Jensen bottoms out. He rests there, hips still as stone as he puts his hands on Jared’s cheeks and just kisses him. They kiss like that for what seems like hours, tongues darting into each other’s mouths and lips numb and sloppy from overuse.

Jensen’s body is screaming at him to move but he won’t, not until this kiss is over and until Jared is ready. Finally Jared pulls away and sucks in a deep breath. Jensen looks at him questioningly and Jared nods. His face and neck shine with sweat and Jensen’s heart clenches when Jared kisses him so softly.

He has Jared, really has him, in his life and in his heart and in his bed. And then he starts to move his hips and the world changes all over again.

Jensen moans and sets up a slow, languid pace. All the rush and fervor was expelled during their kisses and now they’re free to just be together, hips rocking in perfect sync.

Jared moves with him, letting out soft moans and clutching desperately at Jensen’s sweaty shoulders. Jensen wants to shift the angle but he doesn’t want to lose contact with Jared’s mouth, with his eyes. He shifts his hips as best he can to hit that spot inside of Jared, and moans brokenly when Jared arches up and clenches around him.

Jensen kisses him again as he wraps his hand around Jared’s leaking cock. It fits perfectly in Jensen’s hand and he squeezes, pulls up once, and Jared is crying out. His fingernails dig into Jensen’s skin and he locks his eyes with Jensen, unable to tear his gaze away. Jensen presses their foreheads together and thrusts into him once more, hard and sudden, and Jared is coming into his palm.

Jared sinks boneless against the bed but manages to keep one leg wrapped around Jensen’s hips. He’s shaking and panting and he puts his hand on Jensen’s cheek, swiping his thumb over Jensen’s abused lips.

Jared looks into his eyes and nods, rocks up against him, and then Jensen is letting out a noise he’s never heard himself make before, eyes slamming shut as he releases deep into Jared’s body.

They collapse in a sweaty heap, panting against each other in moist staccato breaths, fingers burying themselves in damp hair.

Jensen can hardly breathe; can hardly hear over how hard his heart is pounding. He puts his hand on Jared’s chest and feels Jared’s own heart beating against his skin. Jensen presses his lips to the spot and nearly misses Jared’s words.

“Love you,” he whispers hoarsely. Jensen smiles against Jared’s skin, feels completely at peace with the words. He whispers them back into the skin directly over Jared’s beating heart, whispers that he loves him and that he’s never letting go. He presses his lips there again, seals the vow with a soft kiss, and Jensen feels a slight tingle run through his entire body. Jared gives a little shudder and Jensen kisses the spot a third time. It feels important somehow, and Jensen sighs happily against Jared’s skin.

They fall asleep soon after that, all tangled up with their foreheads pressed together, hands pressed against each other’s hearts.



Jensen wakes up the next morning to playful, questing lips on his skin.

They waste an hour or so in bed, relearning each other in the bright sunlight. It’s not as intense as it was the night before, but it’s no less important. They kiss like they mean it, like they’re starving for it, and they can’t seem to stop.

Finally Jensen has to pull away for a shower. He’s not sure what time Misha is bringing Ryan back and he needs to get cleaned up.

He comes out of the bathroom in a fluffy robe but Jared isn’t in bed. Jensen ventures out into the hallway but Jared isn’t in the kitchen, living room or the bathroom either. Finally he notices that Ryan’s door is slightly ajar, and Jensen furrows his brow as he quietly walks up and pushes it open.

Jared is sitting cross-legged on the floor in front of Ryan’s massive Malibu Sandy© dream house set up, and he has a tiny pink dress in his fingers. Jensen’s heart clenches and he knows he’s intruding, but he can’t seem to tear his eyes away.

Jared starts picking up his own accessories, tiny clothes and sunglasses and his signature surfboard, setting them in a neat little pile off to the side. He collects everything that defined him as a doll and puts it all in the bottom drawer of Ryan’s dresser underneath all her old books and clothes. He leans forward and touches two fingers to the roof of the house, bows his head, and then stands up.

He turns around and starts a little when he sees that he’s being watched, and Jensen bites his lip guiltily.

“Sorry,” Jensen mumbles. “I was just looking for you, and - “

“Don’t worry about it,” Jared says with a small smile. “Probably looks weird, but I just figured it was time to say goodbye. I belong here, not there.”

“That’s not weird,” Jensen replies. He reaches out to take Jared’s hand and pull him close. Jared slips his other hand inside Jensen’s robe to rest against his chest. Jensen pulls Jared out into the living room and down onto the couch with him. Jared looks up at him and Jensen tucks a stray lock of hair behind Jared’s ear. He’s never seen it look so messy. “You do belong here. With Ryan, and with me.”

“I know,” Jared replies. He leans forward to kiss Jensen’s lips. They’re swollen and sore from all the use they’ve been put to in the last twelve hours, but he never wants to stop. Jared pulls away and rests his head on Jensen’s chest. “I’m going to miss her sometimes. She was my best friend.”

Jensen nods and cards his fingers through Jared’s hair. After awhile, Jared gets up to take a shower. He kisses Jensen before disappearing into the bathroom. Jensen gets dressed and changes the sheets on his bed, tossing the old ones in the washer and wiping his hands on his thighs. He hears the door open and perks up like an excited puppy. He missed his little girl.

“Knock, knock!” Misha calls out. “Everybody decent?”

Jensen rolls his eyes and walks out into the living room. Ryan runs up to him and he picks her up and kisses her cheek.

“Hey baby!” Jensen says. She wraps her arms around his neck and grins at him. “Did you have fun?”

“Yep!” Ryan shouts. “Saw a whole lotta stars, huh Misha?”

“We saw the Milky Way,” Misha adds. He looks at Jensen closely, eyes lingering on his mouth. Ryan pokes his neck and Jensen hisses.

“What happened to your neck?” Ryan asks curiously. Jensen’s eyes widen and Misha slaps his hand over his mouth to stifle a laugh. “You have a bruise.”

“Uh, nothing,” Jensen says quickly. “I walked into a door.”

“Good one,” Misha replies. Jared comes out into the living room in nothing but a pair of pajama pants, his standard outfit, and Ryan starts to squirm. Jared takes her from Jensen and gives her a hug. She kisses his cheek and Jared’s eyes land on the Sandy doll clutched in Ryan’s fist. Jared smiles softly, runs his finger over Sandy’s tiny face and then sets Ryan back down.

“Go put your stuff away, please,” Jensen says. Ryan rolls her eyes but drags her duffle bag into her room. Jensen turns to see Misha grinning devilishly at them.

“So, did you guys have fun last night?” Misha asks. Jensen rolls his eyes and Jared’s cheeks turn the slightest shade of pink. “Thought so.”

Once Ryan comes back out of her room, Misha says his goodbyes and leaves with a salute. Jared, Jensen, and Ryan all collapse in a lazy pile on the couch and watch TV all afternoon. It’s Sunday and they have nowhere to be but with each other.

Time passes and Ryan never mentions the sudden disappearance of her Malibu Jared© accessories.

[onto to part three.]