(no subject)
don't you fucking dare tell me that i don't care as much as you do. i can't believe you would say that. i gave you everything i had, i broke all my rules for you. i tore down my oh-so-carefully constructed walls, the barriers. i guarded my heart for so long, and so fiercely.. you know that i can count the people who truly know me on one hand. you're one of those people. you KNOW that. you know this is killing me. you know that a small part of me dies every fucking day that you're gone, and you know that i never wanted to feel like this. i never, ever, wanted to be one of those girls who wastes away to nothing if her boyfriend moves away. you know that. but i don't have a choice. because, quite frankly, i'm head-over-heels, crazily, insanely, disgustingly in love with you. you are everything i've always wanted, needed, everything i've missed out on in the past.
ok, so maybe i try not to think of you every .5 seconds of the day. maybe it helps me feel like my heart hasn't been ripped out and flown across the country. maybe it helps me get through the day without wondering WHY, WHY it had to be us, WHY it had to be now, WHY it just had to BE. and i'm sorry if it makes it seem like i don't care, but it couldn't be further from the truth.
i care so much that it's killing me.
ok, so maybe i try not to think of you every .5 seconds of the day. maybe it helps me feel like my heart hasn't been ripped out and flown across the country. maybe it helps me get through the day without wondering WHY, WHY it had to be us, WHY it had to be now, WHY it just had to BE. and i'm sorry if it makes it seem like i don't care, but it couldn't be further from the truth.
i care so much that it's killing me.