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So I haven't written in like 907320958 years. I dunno why, I've just been not too into the computer and such lately. Well last night was hard. Me and Shan were on the phone watching Grey and through commercials we were just discussing how I've changed since grade 9 and not necessarily for the better. I mean it was just a simple discussion and it wasn't a big deal, but I just was so upset by it. I was on the phone still and I started just crying my eyes out. I didn't even tell her I was crying I was trying so hard not to even make a sound and then once I got off the phone I just burst out in tears and I couldn't stop for like half an hour. I just hate thinking that things used to be better and I'VE made them worse. That I've messed things up. It just...I can't even describe it. I don't know what to do about this...