..sad...
I'm emo. I'm fucking dumb. I don't like myself as I was beginning to do. Fuck it. Fuck school, fuck being a failure in which I am. Why keep trying? To show that everything ends and willpower doesn't last as long as a goddamn panick attack does. I once was the numb one- Now it's emptiness. The light is dimming inside of my heart and skull, and it doesn't even matter anymore. Who once lit me up inside now drags me down into an empty escape from reality, but not the typical decent ones. It's a more harsh, depressed state. I can't talk to anyone. I can't be NORMAL...ever. I would say I need drugs but i, for the most part, despise them. I admit, i smoke some weed here and there- but you don't see me ODing on pills, or taking prescritions for pleasure. You don't see me indulging in snorting artificial substances into my membrane of a nose...it just doesn't make my puzzle piece together. I am a loner now. Friends get you nowhere in life. It's drama, drama, drama. I hate being in highschool, and mainly being a freshman. I make people feel like shit, cause like a dumbass, I truly express my emotions. Fuck. {They don't love you like I love you} Why am I such a jealous prick?