Earlier this week I delivered some (free) furniture to my friend. It was late (11:30) but it is difficult for me to get a truck and Kerry's dad volunteered at the last minute
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Generally: 1. When someone gifts you with something it is proper to say "Thank you." 2. When someone personally delivers a large such gift to you at their own expense trouble and convenience, it is proper to say "Thank you." 3. When that time and convenience is not particularly yours, it is proper to compromise in the interest of receiving the gift and do so graciously. 4. It is inappropriate to drop in unannounced at any time of the day and most particularly after 11. Telephone calls are inappropriate after 11pm. We don't know if you'd mentioned bringing the stuff as soon as you got a truck and left it open between you and the friend or if this was a random act of giftedness on your part. That would impact the appropriateness IMHO.
The email was very rude but having read the other responses, I understand that there is a history and this is not just a random roommate that you don't know. The history of this, however does not preclude civility although we often forget that....particularly when we are overtired or feeling protective of our home and hearth.
I think this might be an excellent opportunity for some issues to be put on the table and discussed. Apologies might be hard pressed, given the people involved ....ye stubborn lot...but some talking and some listening is important. Listening in particular to what is not being said.
1. When someone gifts you with something it is proper to say "Thank you."
2. When someone personally delivers a large such gift to you at their own expense trouble and convenience, it is proper to say "Thank you."
3. When that time and convenience is not particularly yours, it is proper to compromise in the interest of receiving the gift and do so graciously.
4. It is inappropriate to drop in unannounced at any time of the day and most particularly after 11. Telephone calls are inappropriate after 11pm. We don't know if you'd mentioned bringing the stuff as soon as you got a truck and left it open between you and the friend or if this was a random act of giftedness on your part. That would impact the appropriateness IMHO.
The email was very rude but having read the other responses, I understand that there is a history and this is not just a random roommate that you don't know. The history of this, however does not preclude civility although we often forget that....particularly when we are overtired or feeling protective of our home and hearth.
I think this might be an excellent opportunity for some issues to be put on the table and discussed. Apologies might be hard pressed, given the people involved ....ye stubborn lot...but some talking and some listening is important. Listening in particular to what is not being said.
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