Yom Kippur
I'm sorry, for anything I may have done to hurt any of you, physically or emotionally, intentionally or unintentionally, over the past year.
My rabbi said that this holiday isn't about feeling like shit about yourself. It's about reflecting on the past year, and how you've changed, and the world's changed. And it's weird...cuz I was reading my journal the other night, and I found my entries from high holy days 2 years ago (there's no entry from last year, I was bad about journaling then). And in 2004, I was talking about how much I'd changed since 2003. And I had to laugh, considering how strange 2004 seems now, and because I didn't think my rabbi had ever told me to use this time to reflect on change before.
I've changed so much. Grown up, branched out, stopped being afraid to have fun. In 2004 I was laughing at 2003 me for being prude and stupid. But 2004 and even 2005 me were really lame compared to me now (who is still pretty lame). It's just funny, how much you can look back, and be like "what was I thinking?" Especially when you make predictions of the future that are so off base. Like in March 2005, when I said that Adam and I could never be as close as we were in March 2004 (a month before we started dating), but now we're closer. Or maybe we were equally close, but had less to talk about.
We've all grown up so much. And I'm talking about the whole year, not just the last month that we've been in college. Everyone's so different, and our relationships with each other are so different. Not better or worse, just different. This whole year was really weird, because everyone decided that they were going away and didn't need to prove anything to anyone.
Fuck. I'm hungry already.
My rabbi said that this holiday isn't about feeling like shit about yourself. It's about reflecting on the past year, and how you've changed, and the world's changed. And it's weird...cuz I was reading my journal the other night, and I found my entries from high holy days 2 years ago (there's no entry from last year, I was bad about journaling then). And in 2004, I was talking about how much I'd changed since 2003. And I had to laugh, considering how strange 2004 seems now, and because I didn't think my rabbi had ever told me to use this time to reflect on change before.
I've changed so much. Grown up, branched out, stopped being afraid to have fun. In 2004 I was laughing at 2003 me for being prude and stupid. But 2004 and even 2005 me were really lame compared to me now (who is still pretty lame). It's just funny, how much you can look back, and be like "what was I thinking?" Especially when you make predictions of the future that are so off base. Like in March 2005, when I said that Adam and I could never be as close as we were in March 2004 (a month before we started dating), but now we're closer. Or maybe we were equally close, but had less to talk about.
We've all grown up so much. And I'm talking about the whole year, not just the last month that we've been in college. Everyone's so different, and our relationships with each other are so different. Not better or worse, just different. This whole year was really weird, because everyone decided that they were going away and didn't need to prove anything to anyone.
Fuck. I'm hungry already.