Observations..
So a conversation in the early hours of this morning got me in deep thought mode for most of today and pretty much all night upto now where I feel like I need some form of release. I love it when i'm on an endless train of thought that ends up being so deeply complex that I feel as if i'm about to explode or something.
It's so strange how some people are so content with their lives, with living the way that 'normal' people live and doing things in a specific order and just taking what comes their way:
And then there are the people who aren't satisfied, who are always searching for something more, who are always asking questions, who want an explanation, who aren't willing to let their lives pass them by. Whether it's questioning what and who is beyond the clouds or questioning the smallest trivial thing like why Blue is labelled Blue and who states so, for all I know Blue could be Red and thats the way it is. I can't really convey all the questions that I frequently ponder about but I doubt you'd understand why i'd question such things anyway. There are always things that hold us back, that prevent us from really searching and finding all the answers there because well, they don't seem to exist or at least won't exist within our lifetime anyway. Then again... define 'lifetime'.
I'm lingering between the two. Infact alot of things I feel and think seem to be two-way. I've no idea why that is but this is a pure prime example of it.
I have cycles and my life runs its course. Everything in the world touches me on such a deep level that sometimes I can barely stand it. Everything that I admire, I become obsessed with and it becomes my world. Then there's the other days where I just plod on doing and accepting everything for it's face value because thats the 'normal' thing to do.
I'm stopping here or else I will be here all night and I need to get to bed. Most of my day should've been spent doing my FMP but obviously i've been pre-occupied. Which means i'll seriously have to pull my finger out and get some work done tomorrow for Monday.
In Conclusion:
I want answers but I also like the mystery.
I wonder if saying anything about any of this is even wise. Is it worth being misunderstood, just to get the words out of my head, and try and make sense of any of this? To put myself out there to be judged by people I love, people I like and people I don't give a fuck about?
It's so strange how some people are so content with their lives, with living the way that 'normal' people live and doing things in a specific order and just taking what comes their way:
And then there are the people who aren't satisfied, who are always searching for something more, who are always asking questions, who want an explanation, who aren't willing to let their lives pass them by. Whether it's questioning what and who is beyond the clouds or questioning the smallest trivial thing like why Blue is labelled Blue and who states so, for all I know Blue could be Red and thats the way it is. I can't really convey all the questions that I frequently ponder about but I doubt you'd understand why i'd question such things anyway. There are always things that hold us back, that prevent us from really searching and finding all the answers there because well, they don't seem to exist or at least won't exist within our lifetime anyway. Then again... define 'lifetime'.
I'm lingering between the two. Infact alot of things I feel and think seem to be two-way. I've no idea why that is but this is a pure prime example of it.
I have cycles and my life runs its course. Everything in the world touches me on such a deep level that sometimes I can barely stand it. Everything that I admire, I become obsessed with and it becomes my world. Then there's the other days where I just plod on doing and accepting everything for it's face value because thats the 'normal' thing to do.
I'm stopping here or else I will be here all night and I need to get to bed. Most of my day should've been spent doing my FMP but obviously i've been pre-occupied. Which means i'll seriously have to pull my finger out and get some work done tomorrow for Monday.
In Conclusion:
I want answers but I also like the mystery.
I wonder if saying anything about any of this is even wise. Is it worth being misunderstood, just to get the words out of my head, and try and make sense of any of this? To put myself out there to be judged by people I love, people I like and people I don't give a fuck about?