Its tough to be soft in a hard city

[_lauren_]

I've been noticing that I'm not my usual chipper and friendly self towards strangers lately and I think the cause of it is living in this city. Now before anyone objects, I'd like to point out that its very easy to be friendly with a person you like or a stranger who automatically is friendly towards you. I think friendliness begets friendliness, but few people are initiators of it. Lately I haven't been much of an initiator and although my outward actions are polite I've noticed that my inner thoughts have been selfish and impatient.

I've found that my inner state of mind is almost more important than my actions because they reflect what's going on inside and although I can act out things they will never be as full and genuine as actions that are supported by the sincerity of my mind. Living in this city makes the people around me seem so impersonal and tedious when although it really does seem that way its certainly not the case. Its just hard to remember that when everyone around you is pushing by thinking of only their selves and the people closest to them when really the strangers around you deserve the same amount of respect and acknowledgment.

We're all so wrapped up in our lives that its hard to remember this or even realize it if we haven't already.