Havent a fuckin clue

Jul 08, 2005 23:16


[ How I feel
|Broken

/
[ What's Playin
|Travis Tritt - I dont love you anymore]

You know I've never been one to really truly express myself. I write which keeps me sane, I sing [ even if its not that good ] because amongst other things it calms my nerves and then theres talking. There's only about 4 people I can really truly talk to. One for certain I can cry on [ but i hardly see her :( -] And that's about it. I've done that dangerous kind of thinking today and right now life kinda really sucks, but life is only what you make it to be. Not others but yourself. I have a tendency to make the worst of it because thats what i really think about life. Do you know whats hard?! What just eats at your heart each and every day?! I'll tell you.. Try losing three of your best friends in a years time. You grow apart and eventually stop talking, You do a total 180 and change the person you use to be, Or like my former.. You decide that you are going to push me away because Im too much of a burden for you and while youre in the process of basically removing me from your life you rip my mother fucking heart out AGAIN. Only this time it was different. This time you swore things would change and theyre not. They were for a while. For a while things were beyond greatness but a person makes one fucking mistake [ didnt even go through with it ] and now all of a sudden is kicked to the curb.. I don't know whats worse really. Feeling as if i have nothing or having someone make you feel like you are nothing. It kills me too cause all the while I give you money for gas when YOU HAVE A FUCKIN JOB. half the time i dont even ask you for a ride you just show up at my house, I defend you and I took care of you when you were sick , I even made sure you were okay when the cops came to fucking Derek & Ashley's house and this is what I get... This is what i always fuckin get because I should really know better. You have no idea what it is you want, and I do. That's the only thing i know.. oh that and the fact that right now youre being fucking ridiculous! And I yet again am the stupid bitch that no matter what will take your side in a hearbeat... Behind every beautiful thing there's some kind of pain

Some how I think this time is going to be different... and not because of you.
So you know what go " Straighten your life out " make up another dumb ass excuse to push me further away except this time don't ask me to come back cause im not sure i can feel like this again.



I need a place to escape to
Yet the pain will still follow
Do you know how much I hate you?
The bitterness leaves my heart hollow
Tears cascade down my face
Thoughts of you fill my head
Never been more anxious to leave this place
Feel as though I'm already dead
A part of me died tonight
Your words pierced right through my heart
My timing's never right
Neither were we from the very start
Why do you feel the need to lie
And push me further away
Are you happy you made me cry
Did that brighten up your rainy day?
I trusted you to stick by me
To help me get through rough times in life
Never imagined you'd be standing behind me
Gripping the end of a crimson painted knife
Left my soul gasping for air
My eyes watched as you stood there
In shock of what you'd gone and done
Ruined me for anyone

Comments appreciated! :]



Which Empire Records Character Are You? Find out @ She's Crafty

oh hell yeah! lol
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