(no subject)
so for once, i'm not avoiding so much as killing time.
i'm sitting at mugby with emily listening to my new obsession, as tall as lions. if anyone has their cd let me know.
so this semester is not going well. not at all. i've been through probably the worst bout of depression i've been through in the past week, at one point seriously considering packing up my shit, driving home, and figuring everything out when i get there. but don't worry. i'm not going anywhere. i'm ok now.
i can't drop any classes (even though i'm failing or getting below a C in EVERYTHING) becuase if i do i won't be a full time student and will get kicked out of my apartment. that would suck. so, what i'm going to do is just keep plugging away for the rest of the semester. i'll do what i can and try my best because, as always, that's all i can do. maybe i'll even figure out what i want to do the rest of my life.
if i pass, sweet. it won't be stellar but i'll still be here. i'll get to stay in winona with my friends and my job that i only hate a little and fun coworkers. and i'll have a better chance of making any money when i get out.
if i fail, there are 2 possibilities:
1. i get put on acedemic probation. i still get to stay here but i can't get anything below a C or i get kicked out of school. i've been on it before and it's only a little scary.
2. i'll drop out (at least for a semester) and either go home and work or stay down here and work. i'd like to stay down here but it depends on the parents. i should talk to them about this so i have some idea of what to expect.
i can finally say that i'm ok with either outcome. they both have their pros and cons and, honestly, its too close to call. so i'm just going to go with it. good plan, right?
i'm sitting at mugby with emily listening to my new obsession, as tall as lions. if anyone has their cd let me know.
so this semester is not going well. not at all. i've been through probably the worst bout of depression i've been through in the past week, at one point seriously considering packing up my shit, driving home, and figuring everything out when i get there. but don't worry. i'm not going anywhere. i'm ok now.
i can't drop any classes (even though i'm failing or getting below a C in EVERYTHING) becuase if i do i won't be a full time student and will get kicked out of my apartment. that would suck. so, what i'm going to do is just keep plugging away for the rest of the semester. i'll do what i can and try my best because, as always, that's all i can do. maybe i'll even figure out what i want to do the rest of my life.
if i pass, sweet. it won't be stellar but i'll still be here. i'll get to stay in winona with my friends and my job that i only hate a little and fun coworkers. and i'll have a better chance of making any money when i get out.
if i fail, there are 2 possibilities:
1. i get put on acedemic probation. i still get to stay here but i can't get anything below a C or i get kicked out of school. i've been on it before and it's only a little scary.
2. i'll drop out (at least for a semester) and either go home and work or stay down here and work. i'd like to stay down here but it depends on the parents. i should talk to them about this so i have some idea of what to expect.
i can finally say that i'm ok with either outcome. they both have their pros and cons and, honestly, its too close to call. so i'm just going to go with it. good plan, right?